Chapter 16: Leliana

When she finally pulled away, panting, Leliana’s lips were tender and swollen from kissing, and she buried her face in the crook of his neck as he adjusted his position and wrapped both arms around her again. She was surprisingly comfortable, his strong arms cradling her against his chest and sharing his warmth. She was still cold, not that she’d paid any attention to that recently, and he shuddered as her cold nose pressed against his skin.

He was an incredible kisser, she had to admit – clearly those Free Marches girls had given him some lessons – and she’d lost herself entirely to the simple pleasure of just kissing. Now that she could breathe again and her head had stopped reeling, the worries she’d been suppressing came back into focus.

He was Fereldan. She was Orlesian. He was a nobleman, she a commoner. He was a straight-forward, honest type with an Arling to run and roots already put down; her likely future was as a spy, and she wasn’t going to be able to stay in the same place for any length of time.

They were doomed – before they even got started.

And yet, though she knew she should stop it there before things went any further, the thought of telling him that made her feel ill. She wanted his kisses, needed them; she wanted to taste him and feel his hands in her hair and, and ... more, and even though she knew he was going to break her heart, she knew she wouldn’t walk away.

I’ll just take whatever I can get – and learn to live with the loss later.

“Leliana?” His voice was rough in a way that made her smile against his neck.

“Yes?”

He shifted her a little so he could look down into her face. “How are you feeling?” He smiled at her, a small crooked thing that made her heart pound far faster than any big, charming grin ever had, and she cherished it.

“Still cold, but tolerable, thank you.”

“Don’t thank me – I’d be dead if it weren’t for you. The least I can do is be a human...” He paused, seeming lost for words.

“Human bed warmer?” She giggled, and he smirked. Her giggle was interrupted by a huge yawn, and she pressed her face into his shoulder. “I wonder how late it is?”

“Late enough.” He squeezed her lightly. “You should get some sleep. I don’t think any wildlife will bother us with that fire outside, but I’ll keep watch for a while.”

She shook her head, but he pressed one finger to her lips before she could say anything. “I slept all afternoon while you took care of me, and I’m not the one who almost froze to death. Sleep.”

She grinned wickedly at him and moved, quick like a snake, to gently bite the finger he’d left extended. He gasped and laughed and groaned all at the same time, his dark eyes all but invisible in the dim firelight – but she knew if she could see him clearly, his expression would be priceless, torn between exasperation and arousal. Satisfied, she crawled out of his lap to help him add wood to the fire, then settled down again in his arms and dozed off.

Her dreams were filled with dark figures in the distance – always slipping away from her, and she could never catch up, no matter how hard she tried.