Chapter 2

I looked at him and said, “When you feel up to it, we’ll continue on to the Gardens.”

He looked up slowly and said, “The proper mode of address is “Your Highness.”

I decided to go all in. “Prince Asshole, first, you must be recognizable as human. Until you’ve reached that level, speaking of you as ‘highness’ by me is not going to happen, if it ever will happen.”

Anna giggled and Mason had to cough. Neither looked at Prince Asshole. I turned away from him and looked at the pleasant scenery.

After a few minutes, I heard, “Miss Roberts?”

I turned to look at the Prince. “What is it?”

“Do you really think of me as ‘Prince Asshole?’”

“Yes.”

“I guess I should do something about that.”

“Why don’t you prove me right by calling Mister Anderson and getting me fired or at least removed from this duty?”

“Do you think that is what I do?”

“Why not? It fits your false higher attitude which has earned you your current name.” I paused. Before he could say anything, I said, “How your sister can be such a nice human being when you are such low-life trash is, I admit, beyond me.”

He said, “I guess I have some explaining to do.”

“I’m not interested.”

He looked at me in surprise. I repeated, “I’m not interested. I really don’t care why you’re an asshole. I only care that you are since I’m forced to be in your presence.”

He did blush. Anna giggled. Mason was coughing again.

He said, “Miss Roberts, I didn’t mean to make you angry with me.”

I interrupted. “I wasn’t angry with you. Assholes don’t think. I don’t get angry with non-thinkers. However, you’re in the United States. We don’t have royalty. I now have personal experience in understanding why. Anyone who’s too good to shake someone’s hand is an asshole. That’s you.”

Mason was coughing again. Anna was now laughing at her brother. I looked over at Mason and said, “Either laugh or I will kick your butt so hard that the cough will leave you along with your rectum.” He gave up and laughed.

Prince Asshole was now red-faced but no longer from the hot temperature. He was getting mad. I knew I was intentionally baiting him and his sister’s laughter wasn’t helping him get his emotions under control. I decided that I had little to lose and, therefore, wasn’t about to apologize or back down. That wasn’t my way anyway.

He forced himself to calm down. He said, “Miss Roberts, please let me tell you how I regret my inaction.”

“I’m sure you do, now.” I paused.

“If you’re no longer suffering from the heat, we will continue to walk to the Gardens and tour them.” I looked at Anna and Mason. “Let’s go.”

Prince Asshole stood grabbing his coat. I think he rightly realized that no one was inclined to carry it for him. He took an instant to get his balance. He said, “I’m ready.”

I decided that, while he may be an asshole, he did have a reservoir of guts. We continued walking toward the Gardens. Once there, Mason purchased tickets for all four of us while the Prince made lengthy use of the water fountain. I looked over at him and said, “Slow down. After being that hot, you’ll make yourself sick and be a mess, too.”

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you, Miss Roberts?”

“Actually, no. I don’t wish bad things on people even if they seem to deserve those bad things.”

He said, “I would have thought you would have just let me drink myself sick.”

“No. As I said, I wouldn’t let even an asshole get sick if I could avoid it happening. I was taught basic manners by my parents. In the south, we tend to be kind to those less blessed than average. Our culture is polite even to those who don’t deserve it, bless your heart.”

Anna and Mason heard. Mason was grinning. “In the south, you can say anything about someone if you add ‘bless their heart.’” He laughed and Anna joined him.

Prince Asshole looked at my grinning face. His face got red again. I just chuckled at him. Mason distributed the tickets. Anna and I went in with Mason close behind. Prince Asshole brought up the rear.

We went through the exhibits as it continued to get warmer. Anna rolled up her sleeves as did Mason. Prince Asshole walked with us moving his coat from one arm to the other. He was still sweating. We enjoyed the Gardens and special exhibits. It was lunchtime when Mason called our limo to return for us. After he finished, I quietly suggested the Varsity for lunch.

His eyes shifted toward Prince Asshole. He said, “You’re going to wear his ass out.”

“Either he’ll get worse or will become human. I knew this was crappy duty when I was sent to your father’s office. I’ll either get out of it or it will become tolerable.”

“Remind me to never piss you off, Jar.”

“Don’t piss me off, Mason.” I grinned.

The limo picked us up and conveyed us to the Varsity. The four of us got out with Prince Asshole’s coat and tie being left in the car. I led the group to a counter. Before us was a huge African-American man who saw the Prince and hollered in his face the immortal words, “What’ll you have? What’ll you have?” Prince Asshole stumbled back wordless. I ordered for the two of us and paid with my company card.

Mason ordered for Anna and for himself. Carrying the tray for Prince Asshole and myself, I went into one of the rooms and seated us. I put his food in front of him and mine in front of me. I bowed and silently asked God to bless the food and help me better tolerate Prince Asshole. I knew I shouldn’t enjoy another person’s discomfort so much but he needed a tougher life.