I sat at my desk in second period History class and watched Theo Collins working on the test my students were taking. He always caught my eye when I saw him. He was different from the other boys in the class, never with friends. He was a good looking and intelligent boy. He should be popular with the girls and other boys but he seemed to be a loner, always keeping to himself.
He intrigued me. I knew he would score a B+ or an A on the test. Forty minutes later I called time and collected their papers. When he handed me his test paper his fingers touched mine and I felt a tingle in my fingertips. His fingers lingered as he smiled up at me.
I don’t know why I felt disappointment when I took his paper and had to break contact with his fingers. I finished collecting all of the papers just as the class was over. I could not take my eyes off of him as he walk out of the classroom.
I did not know what was wrong with me. Every time he is in my class or I see him in the halls I get a tingling warmth in my chest. A 14 year old boy should not invoke such feelings in a 31 year old woman. Especially Miss Emma White, who at the present is admittedly without a live-in girlfriend.
I came out to my family eleven years ago when I brought home my lover Lisa Daley. It was during summer break in my second year of college. I insisted that we would sleep together. My father and brother just shrugged and said it was about time I admitted my orientation. My mother was in shock for two days. But Lisa soon had my mother wrapped around her finger and all was forgiven. Four years ago a freak car accident took Lisa from me. My mother was heartbroken and could not stop crying at Lisa’s funeral. My mother missed her almost as much as I do. I have not been able to form a permanent relationship with another woman since then. No one could replace the love of my life.
So why was this 14 year old boy giving me the same feeling that Lisa did when she teased and threatened to ravage my body?
I had just finished grading papers and retrieved my umbrella from under the desk. I walked out of my classroom and down the now empty hall. When I got to the main exit I saw Theo sitting on the floor reading. It was unusual for any student to be in the building after three o’clock. This place empties out in ten minutes except for teachers and staff, and it was already a little after four o’clock.
He was deep in concentration. I had to tap him on his shoulder to get his attention and once again my fingers tingled. He looked up and smiled.
“Hey Theo, how come you’re still here? You can’t tell me you like it here that much.”
“I was going to walk home but with the rain I thought it would be better if I waited for my mom to get out of work and pick me up.” he replied.
“What time does your mother get out of work?”
“That’s kind of late. Where do you live?”
“East Thompson Street.”
“I go right by there. Call your mom and tell her you have a ride home. There is no need for you to sit here for another hour.”
Theo took out his cell phone and called his mother. “Hey Mom. Miss White, my history teacher, said she can give me a ride home ... Is it okay with you? ... Yeah I know Mom. I’ll be careful.”
“My Mom said it’s okay.”
“Well okay then.” I opened my umbrella and held it over us as we left the building and walked to my car in the parking lot. I unlocked the car doors and held the passenger side door open for Theo to get in. I went around and got in the driver seat, folded up my umbrella and put it in the back and shut the car door.
I put on my seat belt. “Buckle up Theo.” It was only a couple of miles to East Thompson Street so it did not take long. We drove down the street until he pointed out his house. I pulled into the driveway of the white cape. He unbuckled his seat belt and had the car door partially open when he turned to me and smiled. “Hey, I don’t know how to thank you for the ride.”
I blurted out, “How about a little kiss? That would be a nice thank you.”
He shut the door and move over toward me. I put my hands on his shoulders and leaned in and our lips met. The kiss was long and sensual. Not the peck on the cheek I had expected. I knew it was not all his doing. I did not turn or have the desire to turn my cheek before his lips met mine. I am not sure if I would have stopped kissing him if he had not pulled away.
“Thank you Miss. White. I will see you again.” Then he was out of the car running up the walk to his front door. I watched until he opened the door and disappeared inside.
My heart was racing and I was at a loss as to why I had done such a thing with a student. I pulled down the sun visor and opened the vanity mirror. I reached in my purse and took out my lipstick and put on a fresh coat. Something I did when I was nervous or when I anticipated having sex with Lisa. I glanced back at the white cape and wondered what he was thinking. It must have been another five minutes before I pulled myself out of my stupor and drove home.
Monday morning I received an e-mail from the principal requesting my availability to have a teacher parent conference with Mrs. Mary Collins. I could not think of any academic reason for Mrs. Collins to need to meet with me. I bit my lip as I read the message. One innocent kiss. A weak moment and my career could be over. Why was I so stupid as to let something like that happen? There was no way I could avoid this meeting. I responded hoping that the inappropriate kiss was not going to be the subject of the meeting.
Two days later at exactly 3:15 pm a handsome woman walked into my classroom and introduced herself as Mrs. Mary Collins. Her five foot seven figure immediately catching my attention. I took in her pleasant face and the delicate scent of her perfume as I greeted her.
“Have a seat Mrs. Collins. I have Theo’s academic records right here.” Mrs. Collins held up her hand and stopped me from proceeding.
“I will get right to the point Miss. White. You are about to have an affair with my son. It is inevitable and I need your assurance that you will take the necessary precautions to prevent a pregnancy. My son is far too young to take on such a responsibility.”
I sat shocked and had no response to what she suggested. Her accusation spun around in my brain looking for a reply that was not there.
“I can see you don’t believe me. But it is true. Over the last six months three other women in my neighborhood have come under his spell and have had affairs with him. I cannot stop you and you will not be able to stop yourself. I will not and cannot condemn you for it. I feel the attraction myself but have so far been able to resist succumbing to his will.”
I finally found my voice. “I must apologize for what I did. I admit I kissed him. I’m not sure why I did it except that I see he is always alone in school and maybe I just felt sorry for him. It won’t ever happen again. And what you are suggesting cannot possibly happen. You see Mrs. Collins, I am gay.”
“It won’t matter Miss White.” Mrs. Collins stood up and offered her hand. I reached out and shook it and felt a tingle go up my arm as she reiterated her warning. “Remember Miss White, take precautions.” With that last statement hanging in the air she turned and left my classroom and shut the door behind her.
I sat unable to move. My hands started to tremble. What was happening to me? I have men friends but I was not attracted to them sexually. There were a couple of senior girls that I found stimulating and I might have had a fantasy or two about. But I would never think to approach them. None of the other boys stirred any feeling in me. If I wanted company all I had to do was make a phone call to one of the other unattached woman in my circle of friends or go to one of the bars that catered to woman of my persuasion.
I took out my phone and dialed. I needed to get Theo and his mother’s words off my mind. “Hey Diane ... Yeah me too. Would you like to come over for a glass of wine or two? ... Sure, is about eight good for you? ... Okay see ya.”
I woke up next to a sleeping Diane. I got up and went to take a shower. Apparently Diane was just the distraction that I needed. I had not thought about Theo once while she was here. We shared a bottle of wine. Caught up on who was seeing who. Had an interesting conversation concerning the pros and cons of gay marriage. And had a great time in bed having sex.
Why was Theo the first thing I thought of when I left the bedroom and got in the shower?
I closed my eyes and put my hand between my legs and tried to think of Diane’s warm kisses and the way her lips explored my body. I leaned against the tile wall and masturbated. “Yes Theo kiss me.”
The shower door opened. “Started without me honey?” Diane teased.
“Sorry I thought you were still sleeping.”
“Well I’m not now. Here, let me help.” Diane kissed me and pushed my hand away from my pussy. She put a leg between mine and we rubbed our pussy on each other’s thighs as we kissed and pulled and twisted each other’s nipples. Her tongue invaded my mouth. I dueled with it and squeezed her boobs.
“I am almost there Diane.”
“Okay sweetie. Do you want to do it or do you want me to?”
“I’ll do it.” We moved a bit apart but still kissed. We each stuck our fingers between our legs and masturbated. I got myself off in about two minutes and Diane had her orgasm a minute later. We stood smiling and holding onto each other as the warm water started to turn cool. We quickly washed and got out of the shower.
As we were drying off Diane asked “Who’s Theo?”
“Theo? What Theo?”
“The gal you were begging to kiss you in the shower. Do I know her?”
“Oh that Theo. Just someone I met when I went home to visit my parents in Maryland. Nothing serious. A one-timer. But she was awfully cute.”
Thankfully Theo did not have History until Tuesday of next week. I didn’t even see him in the halls. Although I shamefully looked for him for no other reason than to convince myself that I was in control. At least that’s what I told myself.
I got through the weekend without thinking about him too much. I had invited Diane to spend the weekend with me on Cape Cod. The two big S’s, Shopping and Sex always helped when I was upset.
I was back at my desk Monday morning feeling refreshed and thinking Mrs. Collins was some kind of delusional Gypsy nutcase. Thinking I would believe he had already seduced three women. How could she possibly think that her fourteen year old son could seduce a dyed-in-the-wool lesbian? Okay so I kissed him. It wasn’t like I kissed his penis. Just the thought of kissing a man’s penis is repulsive to me.
I have only seen two penises in my whole life. My brother’s because he was careless about shutting his bedroom door and that one time in college when I agreed to spend the night with a guy to see what it was like. We had intercourse twice and I only had one orgasm and that was self-induced while he slept. Where my sexual preference lay after that night was never again in question.
By the end of Monday I was feeling pretty good. Nothing had come of my momentary indiscretion with Theo and his mother I could dismiss as a crackpot. As I walked toward the exit I saw Theo standing and looking out as if waiting for someone. He turned and spotted me.
“Hi Miss White.”
“Hello Theo. Waiting for your mother?”
“No I am going to walk.” Then he touched my arm. “Thanks again for the ride last week.”
I told myself to just keep walking out the door but I didn’t. I looked at his handsome face. “I could give you a ride if you want.”
We rode the two miles to his house in silence. He started to get out of the car. I smiled in what I hoped was just a friendly gesture and the words spilled out of my mouth. “Don’t I get a thank you today?” I knew it was the wrong thing to say but I could not help myself. I needed him to kiss me.
He turned back to me and smiled that irresistible smile. We leaned over the center console and we put our arms around each other and our lips met. He licked under my upper lip and electricity shot up my spine. I pushed my tongue against his teeth and he opened his mouth. My tongue met his. I pulled back alarmed at what I was doing. I was in my car making out with a fourteen year old student in broad daylight right in front of his house. I took a deep breath to try and calm myself.
“You better go Theo. It’s getting late.” My heart was racing and my thighs were tingling.
He opened the car door and looked back at me. “Maybe you can give me a ride tomorrow?”
“Maybe. We’ll see. Good-bye Theo.”
He got out and walked up his walk to the front door. Coming to my senses I backed out of the driveway and headed home as fast as the speed limit would allow. I had a feeling of dread and that his mother may not be such crackpot after all. This could not be happening to me. He is a boy. If it were a girl I could almost understand my attraction, although I never had any intention or desire to molest an underage girl.
I parked in my driveway and ran into the house. I needed a distraction. I dialed Diane’s number and she picked up after three rings. She had a date and could not come over. I dialed Peggy and it went to voice mail. I tried Gail and she said Diane was coming over and she could not make it. But maybe we could get together some other time. I was just about to invite myself over when I remembered Gail was not into group sex. It was not my preference either but I was desperate.
I masturbated twice that night. Once in the shower after I had called my friends and again when I went to bed.
I tried to remain focused throughout Tuesday. Trying not to think about yesterday. Would Theo be expecting a ride home? Would I have the strength to refuse? I kept telling myself he is young. He can walk two miles.
I avoided going into the hallways between classes. I ate lunch at my desk and didn’t take a walk after. Except for History class I managed to avoid seeing Theo throughout the entire day. At a little past three o’clock I headed for the exit. There are multiple exits from the building and I could have easily gone out one that I normally do not use. But I needed to end this foolishness. I needed to find the strength to tell him no if he was waiting and expecting another ride home. I had started to believe he did have some power over me but I needed to face it and defeat it or I would be forever lost. I needed to show him I could say no.
He was waiting at the exit. He smiled and waved as I came toward him. “Hey Miss. White. How about a ride?”
I started to say no but I changed my mind. It was the kiss I had to say no to, not the ride. That was it. Beat him at his own game. Show him I could say no at my most vulnerable moment.
I tried to sound upbeat and casual although I was nervous. “Of course, Come on, let’s go.”
I drove tight lipped with white knuckles. I kept telling myself I could do this. The feelings I was having were not sexual, just nervousness. I kept repeating to myself. ‘I can do this. I can do this.’
I pulled into his driveway and parked. I turned to him to say good-bye. He leaned forward and kissed me before I could stop him. “Thank you Miss White.” I don’t know why but my arms went around him and pulled him to me as I returned the kiss.
Buttons on my blouse were being undone and I didn’t care. My blouse was pulled from the waistband of my skirt and the last two buttons came loose. He reached behind me and expertly unhooked my bra. I felt my breasts being freed and somewhere in my mind I knew this was wrong but I didn’t care. Soft, warm and gentle hands cupped my breasts. I wanted nothing more in the world than to be touched there.
He stopped kissing me and moved lower. My thoughts willed him to do my bidding. Oh yes, god yes, do that, lick my boobs. Yes Theo suckle on them.
And suckle them he did. He pushed my breasts together and took turns licking and sucking my nipples. I had my arms around him encouraging him. “Yes baby suck them. That feels so wonderful. Don’t you dare stop. Oh god, oh god I think I am going to cum.”
Theo sucked and licked through my entire orgasm. My body twitched and my head bobbed as I entered that special place that made my body feel so alive. So content to be a woman.
I sat exhausted and very satisfied. I wondered what he would want me to do now. I was willing to do anything for this boy. Yes he is a male but after what he just did for me it only seemed fair. Maybe just this one time. What could it hurt?
I was about to ask the question when he opened the car door. Just before he got out he told me, “You ‘will’ give me a ride home tomorrow.”
“Yes of course.” I hastily answered.
“Good evening Miss White.”
“Good evening Theo.” He shut the car door and walked away.
I felt a sense of loss and abandonment as I sat disheveled. My blouse wide open, my bra askew, my right breast totally exposed. I took out my lipstick and pulled down the vanity mirror and nervously applied a new coat. I raked my fingers through my hair. I didn’t even bother to hook my bra back on. I buttoned two buttons on my blouse and backed out of the driveway and drove home wondering how I had let that happen.
On Wednesday I could not wait for the day to end. I had agreed to give Theo a ride home. All I could think about was what we had done the day before and how I wanted that feeling again.
He was waiting and smiling when I got to the exit. “Hi Miss White. Today should be fun.”
I smiled, “Then I think we should get going.” I felt the heat rise in my neck when I thought about what he was alluding too. Yes Theo I want your lips and hands on me. I walked faster to my car than I usually do. I had the car started and was backing out of my parking space before he had his seat belt on. I didn’t bother with mine.
I drove to his house and parked in the driveway. I didn’t wait for him to kiss me. I leaned toward him as soon as he had his seat belt off and kissed him. We held the kiss for a full minute. His hand sought my breasts. I sat up and started to unbutton my blouse.
“Maybe you would like to come in Miss White? My Mom won’t be home for a couple of hours.”
There was no mistaking his intension to continue what we had started behind closed doors. Yes, that was the smart thing to do. What if someone noticed I was doing more than giving him a ride home? Yes, yes that’s what I needed to do. I needed to go in the house with him.
We got out of the car and I followed him up to the front door. He opened the door and he held it for me to enter. I stood inside and waited anxiously for him to close and lock the door.
He took my hand and led me up the stairs to what was obviously his bedroom. Star Wars posters on the wall. An unmade double bed. Action figures and video games strewn about the room.
Theo sat on the edge of the bed with his hands folded in his lap and smiled. I unbuttoned my blouse as I looked at that handsome face. The unkempt dirty blond hair with the cute cowlick. I set my blouse aside and took off my bra. No words were spoken but my mind was reeling with anticipation. Here they are Theo. Here are my breasts. I need you to do what you did yesterday.