Chapter 31

Bill’s turn:

Guys, as a general rule, don’t get much out of weddings. This one’s slightly different than a lot of them. First off, no ‘princess for a day’ trying to emulate the nuptials of British royalty. Second, it’s got this age disparity. No, I’m not denigrating that. I have one of those myself and I’m standing next to Dan Richards, who married a fourteen year old. I might’ve been sleeping with a fourteen year old, but we married when she turned sixteen.

Now I’m sleeping with another one. Well, Deena’s fifteen now, but there we were...

“They’ll last,” Dan opined. “They have that look...”

“Look at the crowd, bud,” I said. “Examples out the kazoo.”

“Yeah ... I remember some of those that the groom was still hung over from his bachelor party and had a posse of turds and thugs egging him on and she was still leaking from her bachelorette party, sporting a new tattoo.”

“Yeah ... One of Haley’s contemporaries. Well, two years older. Fresh high school diploma, for what that’s worth today,” I stated. “Haley got invited because the girl basically graduated due to Haley’s math tutoring.”

“And you went?” he asked, somewhat incredulously.

“Oh, yeah ... Put my suit on, let Haley and Deena get a chance to wear dresses. I don’t want ‘em too insulated. Let ‘em see the other side of the coin. And this girl’s family was the other side of a pretty good coin. Upscale neighborhood. Both parents employed, McMansion. Her own car...”

“And here we are watching this couple get married and SHE has a seven figure bank account...”

“And,” I said, “she’s crazy over him and he’s crazy over her ... She and Haley and Deena talk a lot.” I chuckled. “She’s beautiful, but I’m willing to bet my left foot that she wears a dress about three times a year...”

“Oh, more than that,” he laughed. “We all go to church pretty often and she wears a dress for that.”

“Oh, okay ... Missed that angle.”

“Yeah,” he said. “and for quite a while back, she’s been showing up at church with HIM. I guess that’s one reason that the preacher didn’t call down fire and brimstone about the fourteen year old getting married.”

“They walk the walk,” I said.

“Yep. If Cindy’s right...” he started.

“And I’ve been told that Cindy’s ALWAYS right...” I laughed.

“Yeah, that’s the safe way to bet. She says they’ve not gotten past vigorous hugs and kisses. She’s a virgin. He’s had his period of chasing and catching, but when Terri hit ‘im, he shut that down. Most patient guy on the planet. And several girls tried...”

“I know what it’s like to want that apple at the top of the tree,” I said.

“Myself,” he replied. “Well actually, I had little idea of what Cindy was, intellectually, when she targeted me. I knew ‘smart’, but I had no idea HOW smart...”

“Yeah, Haley’s been blossoming ever since I met ‘er. Now she’s got Deena running alongside.”

Dan kind of turned to me. “Yeah. Deena. What’re you gonna do when THAT one comes through the door and ‘Daddy, this is Snerdly. We wanna get married’?”

A whole lot of dominoes tumbled in my brain. “I’d hope I could be as well-adjusted as Alan,” I said.

“Oh, boy,” he laughed. “Alan got adjusted by Tina and Terri and every other female in the Community.”

“I bet,” I said. “I see too many smiling faces...”

“‘S what Cindy said. How’re you gonna tell Terri ‘no’ when she sees Cindy, Dana, Nikki? I couldn’t offer an argument, for damned sure.”

“I know the feeling. When conversation goes in that direction, I tend to clam up. Still, they’re a good-looking couple.”

“Yep,” Dan said. “They’re part of the Community now. You guys are building the same thing over there, I believe.”

“Yeah ... Looks like it. Seems to be driven by the females...”

“That’s the observation I made. I mean, Cindy and I flew off to see a Bach concert and ran into Alan and Tina. Alan and I worked a job together, but headed off in different directions. Our wives, though ... instant connection, and they MADE this happen.”

In the musical aftermath, I danced with Haley and with Deena. Deena swept a circuit around the floor with Derek. He’s her age. I noted that while Deena and Derek were dancing, Rachel was just a bit short of overtly murderous. I think she regards Derek as personal property. I poked Haley. “I’m gonna try and dance with Rachel,” I said.

“Please do,” she snickered. “Before she punches Deena.”

I asked. Rachel looked shocked. “Just a dance, Rachel. I’m not proposing marriage.”

“Uh ... okay...”

“Derek’s dancing with Deena.”

She looked hard at me. “And I’m supposed to be okay with it, right?”

“Yep. Just dancing. Social. Friendly. And I’ll bet that he comes straight back and gets you...”

She smiled as he and Deena made their way next to us. “Swap!” Deena commanded.

“Don’t wanna. Rachel’s a cutie,” I said.

“Daaa-aaddd!”

We swapped partners. “You dance better anyway,” Deena said. “He was nervous as a cat.”

“Young love,” I said.

“Yeah. And one day it’ll be old love. But that’s love at work there.” She smiled. “And I’ve found MINE, too...”

“That’s good to know ... he’s a lucky guy...”

“Uh-huh. Next dance, you get Haley.”

Haley was over across the floor with a college guy who was part of the robotics lab.

The next song was a waltz and I do pretty good and I can sweep my diminutive Haley around in my arms in fine fashion. Proprieties must be observed.

Terri and Jerry left the reception. We partied on for another hour before we complied with the announced plan – go change into comfortable clothes and return. Food and music are the standard thing on Saturday night.

I gathered my girls and headed to the hotel. In the car, there was happy talk about the event and about the idea that Terri and Jerry were off for a week away.

“Whatever do you think they’ll do?” Deena tittered.

“I just can’t picture Terri as that ‘scared virgin’ stereotype,” Haley said. “Our sister’s got it together...”

By eleven PM I’m completely drained. Ministrations to my spent member by either or both my mates causes only the slightest of stirrings.

Deena giggled. “Cindy said that in the aftermath of a marriage it is quite common and proper for couples to re-establish their mating.”

“And we’re a couple and a half,” Haley grinned, “so we had to do extra, just to make sure.”

“We love you,” Deena said.

“We do,” reinforced Haley. “We saw dozens of decent guys, Bill. You’re the only one that does it for me.”

“And me,” Deena giggled. “Boy, Rachel watched me CLOSE when I danced with Derek, though...”

“Yeah, I saw that. I don’t think she was worried so much about Derek as she was about you. She doesn’t know you that well.”

“Yeah. I think they belong together,” Deena said. “‘Sides, I GOT mine.”

She reached down just a little bit, beating Haley’s hand to a totally depleted bit of me.

“Even if you have to share,” Haley giggled.

The next morning we all convoyed to the community pavilion for Sunday breakfast. It’s well attended. After that, though, we’re already right near the airfield for the flight home.

Cindy’s gonna be our pilot, naturally. That’s one Pilatus. Johanna’s got the other one out, she’s bringing Judge Charlie and Aunt Helen home. That’s a short hop, but they wanted to make his trip up here as easy on him as possible.

We start loading our plane.

“Okay,” Cindy said. “Co-pilot slot’s open. Who...”

“Me!” Haley squeaked. “Can I have half?”

“Objections?” Cindy asked. “No? Sandy? Brindy? Lita? Anybody?”

Sandy spoke up. “Uh, what about Mandy?”

Mandy smiled. “Oh, I get the whole return trip. Y’all go ahead.”

“Then I got the landing,” Sandy said.

“Gosh, Sandy,” Nina spouted.

“Oh, if you want it...”

“Uh, no, you get it. I’ll fit somewhere in the middle.”

“We got that Cessna back home. You can fly that one for real,” I said.

“This ‘un’s for real too,” Cindy giggled.

“No, it ain’t,” I said. “Cindy, you and this whole thing is a fevered dream.”

Haley’s turn:

I’m a little bit envious of Terri’s wedding – it involved a whole lot more people than mine and Bill’s. Of course, when Bill and I got married, our ‘community’ was small and we were concerned about how a marriage between sixteen-year-old me and forty-something him would be viewed, so it was basically us, Mom and Steve and little Stevie and Deena.

Solidly married, though. No doubt. I asked around and I actually had a BIGGER wedding than either Cindy or Nikki or Tina or Dana, for what it’s worth. Seems like it took root for them too.

Okay, I can push the envy away for a bit. I’m sitting in the right seat of this beautiful new airplane, following along on the checklists as Cindy’s co-pilot. Man, it’s nice. Glass cockpit. Such a change from the old analog instruments of the little Cessna we’re using as a trainer. ‘Steam gauges’ Bill calls them. This, though ... All the information from those round instruments and then a whole lot more.

It’s exciting, but after we’ve leveled off at cruising altitude, I give up the seat to ... Carlita.

“I am giving in,” she said. “It appears to be inevitable.”

Cindy’s smiling. “Just a little taste, that’s all it takes...”

And we’re finally home. I make a point of walking over to say hi to Mom and Steve and little Stevie. He’s growing. First grader.

Afterward, I get back to our house and walk in on Bill and Deena putting stuff away.

“Not the way I would’ve done it,” I said, smirking.

“And exactly what would YOU have done?” Deena queried. I know she KNOWS the answer.