Chapter 74

A Short one from Dorsetmike

Daft definitions

Logarithms - sound produced by primitive jungle drums

Some more compliments of Hitemp

DOWN AT THE RETIREMENT CENTER

80-year old Bessie bursts into the rec room at the retirement home. She holds her clenched fist in the air and announces, “Anyone who can guess what’s in my hand can have sex with me tonight!!”

An elderly gentleman in the rear shouts out, “An elephant?”

Bessie thinks a minute and says, “Close enough.”

Queensland Police report finding a man’s body in the Brisbane River at New Farm following his apparent attendance at an after-party for the recent same sex marriage plebiscite. The dead man’s name will not be released until his family has been notified. The victim apparently drowned due to excessive marijuana consumption. He was wearing black fishnet stockings, a red garter belt, a pink G-string, a strap-on dildo, purple lipstick, and a “Shorten for PM” T-shirt. He also had a cucumber in his rectum. The police removed the Shorten T-shirt to spare his family any unnecessary embarrassment. In spite of what we sometimes think, the Police do care.