Chapter 542

Joke # 1

Sent for Vetting Sept. 29, 2021

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Another one from Telephoneman:

Cop: You were going way too fast.

Me: I was only trying to keep up with the other traffic.

Cop: There is no traffic.

Me: I know, that’s how far behind I am.

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Alphqwe is at it again!!!

If a tree falls on your ex in the forest and no one hears it, you should get rid of the chainsaw, just in case.

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reader459 sent this one!

This from Fitz in The Sydney Morning Herald:

My car wouldn’t start.

I opened the hood and saw a bat sitting on the engine.

“My you’re a handsome fellow,” said the bat.

I recognized the problem -bat flattery

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I know I shouldn’t have done this, but I am 83 years old, and I was in the McDonald’s drive-through this morning and the young lady behind me leaned on her horn and started mouthing something because I was taking too long to place my order. So, when I got to the first window, I paid for her order along with my own. The cashier must have told her what I’d done, because as we moved up, she leaned out her window and waved to me and mouthed “Thank you.”, obviously embarrassed that I had repaid her rudeness with kindness. When I got to the second window, I showed them both receipts and took her food too. Now she has to go back to the end of the queue and start all over again.

Don’t blow your horn at old people, they have been around a long time.

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