Chapter 490

Alphqwe, provides another helpful hint for the future!

My wife saw me sucking in my gut while standing on the bathroom weight scale.

“That’s not going to help!” she said laughing.

“Yes, it is,” I replied, “I can see the numbers!”

Alphqwe, provides another surprise from his kids!

The young boy asked his father “What between the legs of a woman?”

His father replied, “The Gates of Heaven.”

“Then what’s between the legs of a man?”

“The Key to unlock the Gate.”

The boy thought for a moment then said, “You need to change the lock on Moms Gate because our neighbor has a spare key.”

Modern Day Relationship

Dearest Dad,

I am coming home to get married soon, so get your check book out. I’m in love with a boy who is far away from me. As you know, I am presently living in Australia ... and he lives in Scotland. We met on a dating website, became friends on Facebook, had long chats on Whatsapp. He proposed to me on Skype, and now we’ve had two months of a relationship through Viber. My beloved and favorite Dad, I need your blessing, good wishes, and a really big wedding.

Lots of love and thanks.

Your favourite daughter, Lilly

DAD’S RESPONSE:

My Dearest Lilly,

Like Wow! Really? Cool!

I suggest you two get married on Twitter, have a honeymoon on Tango, buy your kids on Amazon, and pay for it all through PayPal. And when you get fed up with this new husband, sell him on eBay...

Love, Your Dad