Jokes and Giggles Part Two
Copyright© 2017 by Jack Spratt
Chapter 483
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Say thanks to Smokeyjoe34 for these!
Things best not said to a police officer.
1. I can’t reach my license unless you hold my beer.
2. Sorry, Officer, I didn’t realize my radar detector wasn’t plugged in.
3. Aren’t you the guy from the Village People?
4. Hey! You must have been doing about 200Kph to keep up with me. Good job.
5. Excuse me. Is ‘stick up’ hyphenated?
6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer!
7. I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.
8. Bad cop! No donut!
9. You’re not going to check the boot are you?
10. Gee! That gut sure doesn’t inspire confidence in the police force.
11. Didn’t I see you getting your butt kicked on the T.V news the other night.
12. Wow! You look just like the guy in the picture on my girlfriend’s nightstand.
13. Is it true that people become cops because they can’t get a job at McDonalds?
14. You know, I pay your salary.
15. So! Uh! You on the take, or what?
16. Gee! Officer, that’s terrific, the last officer only gave me a warning to.
17. Do you know why you pulled me over? O.K. Just so one of us does.
18. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know that there’s no other cars around, that’s how far ahead of me they are.
19. What do you mean, ‘Have I been drinking’? Your the expert, you tell me.
20. Well, when I reached down to pick up my bag of Crack, my gun fell off my lap and lodged between the brake and accelerator pedals forcing me to speed out of control.
21. Hey! Is that a 9mm? That’s nothing compared to this .44 Magnum.
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