Jokes and Giggles Part Two
Copyright© 2017 by Jack Spratt
Chapter 415
Tax Category
A young woman walks into a Chartered accountant’s office and tells him that she needs to file her tax Returns.
The accountant says, “Before we begin, I’ll need to ask you a few questions.” He gets her name, address etc. and then asks, “What’s your occupation?”
“I’m a prostitute,” she says.
The accountant is taken aback and says, “That’s too gross. Let’s try to re-phrase that.”
The woman says, “OK, I’m a high-end call girl.”
“No, that still won’t work. Need something more acceptable.”
They both think for a minute; then the woman says, “I’m an elite poultry farmer.”
The accountant asks, “What does poultry farming have to do, with being a prostitute?”
“Well, I raised a thousand cocks last year.”
Chartered Acct : “Brilliant!! ‘Poultry Farmer’ it is! and Agricultural Income is tax-free.”
Twelve of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres ever aired on British TV and radio:
1. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator - “This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother.”
2. New Zealand Rugby Commentator - “Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him.”
3. Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator - “And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!”
4. Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race 1977 - “Ah, isn’t that nice. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew.”
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