Chapter 41

Three male bodies arrive at the morgue with big smiles frozen on their lifeless faces. The detective calls the coroner to ask what happened to the men.

“First body: French. 60. Died of Congestive Heart Failure while making love to his mistress. Hence the enormous smile, Detective”, said the Coroner.

“Second body: Scottish. 25. Won one thousand dollars on the slot machines, spent it all on Old Single Malt Scotch Whisky. Died of acute alcohol poisoning. Hence going out with a smile.”

The Detective asked, “What about the third body?”

“Ah,” said the coroner, “This is the most unusual one: Justin Trudeau, Prime Minister of Canada, 45. Struck by lightning.”

“Why is he smiling then?” asked the Detective.

“He thought someone was taking his picture.”

These are compliments of dave7692‎

A client brought a litter of golden retriever puppies to a veterinary clinic for inoculations and worming. As the look-alike pups squirmed over and under one another in their box, the vet realized it would be difficult to tell the treated ones from the rest. So, the vet turned on the water faucet, wet his fingers, and moistened each dog’s head when he had finished.

After the fourth puppy, the vet noticed the talkative client had grown silent. As the vet sprinkled the last pup’s head, the woman leaned forward and whispered, “I didn’t know they had to be baptized, too.”

Two tigers are walking along a jungle trail in single file.

The rearmost tiger wanders off the trail for a few minutes, then reappears shortly thereafter. A few moments later, the front tiger feels what seems to be the other tiger’s tongue, applied just below his tail. The tiger disapproves of this action, but doesn’t want to start anything by bringing it up. Then, the tiger again feels the tongue, again in the same place.

He decides to confront the after tiger, and asks him, “Did you just lick me twice in the butt?”

The other tiger replied, “Yeah, sorry about that. I just ate a lawyer and I was trying to get the taste out of my mouth.”