Chapter 381

Some interesting thought from Bill L.

Some things to think about

I hope they give us two weeks’ notice before sending us back out into the real world. I think we’ll all need the time to become ourselves again. And by “ourselves” I mean lose 10 pounds, cut our hair, and get used to not drinking at 9:00 a.m.

New monthly budget: Gas $0 Entertainment $0 Clothes $0 Groceries $2,799.

Breaking News: Wearing a mask inside your home is now highly recommended. Not so much to stop COVID-19, but to stop eating.

Low maintenance chicks are having their moment right now. We don’t have nails to file and paint, roots to dye, eyelashes to re-mink, and are thrilled not to have to get dressed every day. I have been training for this moment my entire life!

When this quarantine is over, let’s not tell some people.

I stepped on my scale this morning. It said: “Please practice social distancing. Only one person at a time on scale.”

Not to brag, but I haven’t been late to anything in over 6 weeks.

They can open things up next month, I’m staying in until August to see what happens to you all first.

Day 37: The garbage man placed an AA flyer on my recycling bin.

The spread of Covid-19 is based on two things: 1. How dense the population is. 2. How dense the population is.

Appropriate analogy: “The curve is flattening so we can start lifting restrictions now” = “The parachute has slowed our rate of descent, so we can take it off now”.

People keep asking: “Is coronavirus REALLY all that serious?” Listen y’all, the churches and casinos are closed. When heaven and hell agree on the same thing it’s probably pretty serious.

Never in a million years could I have imagined I would go up to a bank teller wearing a mask and ask for money.

Putting a drink in each room of my house today and calling it a pub crawl.

For the second part of this quarantine do we have to stay with the same family or will they relocate us? Asking for myself...

Enjoy your day. You don’t have anything else to do.