Chapter 316

Say thanks to mixerman478 ‎for these:

What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball?
A guy will actually search for a golf ball.

What’s the difference between your boyfriend and a condom?
Condoms have evolved: They’re not so thick and insensitive anymore.

A man goes to a $10 sex worker and contracts crabs.
When he goes back to complain, the sex worker laughs and says, “What do you expect for ten dollars? Lobster?”

What’s the difference between your penis and a bonus check?
Someone’s always willing to blow your bonus.

What’s the difference between hungry and horny?
Where you stick the cucumber.

Why does a mermaid wear seashells?
Because she outgrew her B-shells.

What’s the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping tom?
One snatches your watch. The other watches your snatch.

The story of the well-hung bug.

A family was driving behind a garbage truck when a dildo flies out and thumped against the windshield.

Embarrassed, and to spare her young son’s innocence, the mother turns around and says, “Don’t worry, dear. That was just an insect.”

“Wow,” the boy replies. “I’m surprised it could get off the ground with a cock like that!”