Chapter 284

A gynecologist had become fed up with malpractice insurance and HMO paperwork and was burned out. Hoping to try another career where skillful hands would be beneficial, he decided to become a mechanic.

He went to the local technical college, signed up for evening classes, attended diligently and learned all he could.

When the time of the practical exam approached, the gynecologist prepared carefully for weeks and was able to complete the exam with tremendous skill.

When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had obtained a score of 150%! Fearing an error, he called the instructor saying, “I don’t want to appear ungrateful for such an outstanding result, but I wonder if there is an error in the grade?” The instructor said, “During the exam you took the engine apart perfectly which was worth 50% of the total mark.

You put the engine back together again perfectly, which was also worth 50% of the mark.”

After a pause, the instructor added, “I gave you an extra 50% because you did it all through the muffler which I’ve never seen done before in my entire career!”

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Some Sound advice from gnostic ‎

When buying a gift use the alphabet method.

To buy gifts for a woman just remember your ABCs Aromatics - things that smell nice such as perfume, scented candles, potpourri, fancy soap Bling - shiny sparkly things like rings, necklaces, bracelets Confectionary - sweet things like chocolate, candies, pastries

To buy gifts for men, buy things related to the next three letters, DEF.

Drinking Eating Fucking