Jokes and Giggles Part Two
Copyright© 2017 by Jack Spratt
Chapter 268
Compliment of DomAbrazo
A US Marine enters the Catholic Church confessional booth in Hendersonville, NC.
He tells the priest, “Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. Last night, I beat the ever-living crap out of a flag burning, Cop hating, Jihadist.”
The priest says, “My son, I am here to forgive your sins, not to discuss your community service.”
✧ ✧ ✧
Compliments of a Friend of J & G.
Vive la difference
Bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman – “Which book has helped you most in your life?” The woman replied, “My husband’s checkbook!!”
A prospective husband in a book store “Do you have a book called ‘Husband – the Master of the House?’” Sales girl: “Sir, fiction and comics are on the 1st floor!”
Someone asked an old man: “Even after 70 years, you still call your wife – Darling, Honey, Luv. What’s the secret?” Old man: “I forgot her name and I’m scared to ask her.”
Pharmacist to customer: “Sir, please understand, to buy an anti-depression pill you need a proper prescription ... Simply showing marriage certificate and your wife’s picture is not enough!
For MEN and WOMEN with a bit of humor?? A man was granted two wishes by God. He asked for the best drink & the best woman ever. Next moment he got mineral water & Mother Teresa.
There are 3 kinds of men in this world. Some remain single and make wonders happen. Some have girlfriends and see wonders happen. Rest get married and wonder what happened!
Wives are magicians. They can change anything into an argument.
Why do women live a Better, Longer & Peaceful Life, compared to men? A very INTELLIGENT student replied: “Because women don’t have a wife!”
COOL MESSAGE BY A WIFE: Dear Mother-in-law, don’t teach me how to handle my children. I am living with one of yours and he needs a lot of improvement!?
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