Chapter 229

Say thanks to Dramoth1964‎ for this one:

A woman from New York was driving through a remote part of Arizona when her car broke down. An American Indian on horseback came along and offered her a ride to a nearby town.

She climbed up behind him on the horse and they rode off. The ride was uneventful, except that every few minutes the Indian would let out a Ye-e-e-e-h-a-a-a-a!’ so loud that it echoed from the surrounding hills and canyon walls.

When they arrived in town, he let her off at the local service station, yelled one final ‘Ye-e-e-e-h-a-a-a-a!’ and rode off.

“What did you do to get that Indian so excited?” asked the service-station attendant.

“Nothing,” the woman answered “I merely sat behind him on the horse, put my arms around his waist, and held onto the saddle horn so I wouldn’t fall off.”

“Lady,” the attendant said, “Indians don’t use saddles.”

zonedoc‎ gets right to the point:

As requested a “new” joke.
The punchline:
Donald Trump

These are compliments of Joe Smart...

A priest, a doctor, and an engineer were playing a round of golf but were delayed by the slow-playing foursome ahead of them. When they flagged down the marshal to complain, he explained that the foursome was blind, but the club let them play regularly as part of the community outreach program.

The priest said, “You know, that is very charitable of the club. I think it is a fine thing!”

The doctor said, “Not only is a fine thing on your part, it is healthy for them to get out and enjoy the fresh air. It is a good thing you do!”

And the engineer said, “Yeah, but couldn’t they play at night?”

A golfer went to confession and told the priest, “Father, I have sinned. I was playing golf and I said the F word!”

The priest replied, “That is not uncommon, why don’t you tell me what happened.”

“Well,” said the golfer, “On the long par-5 I sliced right into the dense woods!”

“Yes, I can see how that might cause you to say the F word,” murmured the priest.

“Oh no, that wasn’t the cause! Even before the ball stopped rolling, an eagle swooped in, grabbed the ball in its talons, and flew off!

“Oh my! I can see that would almost certainly cause you to say the F word,” cried the priest.

“Oh no, that wasn’t the cause either! The eagle flew toward the green and dropped the ball right in the crack of an oak tree guarding the green!”

“Goodness gracious, anyone would say the F word if that happened!” the priest proclaimed loudly.

“But that wasn’t it, either, because a squirrel picked up the ball, ran with it onto the green, and dropped it just six inches from the hole!”

“Holy crap!” yelled the priest. “Don’t tell me you missed the fucking putt!”