Chapter 226

Say thanks to jadams‎ for this one

Golf is expensive

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cellular phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen.

MAN: “Hello”

WOMAN: “Hi Honey, it’s me. Are you at the club?”

MAN: “Yes.”

WOMAN: “I’m at the shops now and found this beautiful leather coat. It’s only $2,000. Is it OK if I buy it?”

MAN: “Sure, go ahead if you like it that much.”

WOMAN: “I also stopped by the Lexus dealership and saw the new models. I saw one I really liked.”

MAN: “How much?”

WOMAN: “$90,000.”

MAN: “OK, but for that price I want it with all the options.”

WOMAN: “Great! Oh, and one more thing. I was just talking to Janie and found out that the house I wanted last year is back on the market. They’re asking $980,000 for it.”

MAN: “Well, then go ahead and make an offer of $900,000. They’ll probably take it. If not, we can go the extra eighty-thousand if it’s what you really want.”

WOMAN: “OK. I’ll see you later! I love you so much!”

MAN: “Bye! I love you, too.”

The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room are staring at him in astonishment, mouths wide open. He turns and asks, “Anyone know whose phone this is?”

This one is compliments of bobw40 ‎

A Fairy Tale for MEN

Once upon a time, a Prince asked a beautiful Princess, “Will you marry me?”

The Princess immediately said, “No!”

And the Prince lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and dated thin, long-legged, full-breasted women and hunted and fished and went to gun shows and Topless bars and dated ladies half his age and drank whiskey, beer and wine and never heard any bitching and never paid child support or alimony and dated cheerleaders and got to keep his house and guns and ate spam and potato chips and beans and blew enormous farts and had lots of horses and dogs and all his friends and family thought he was cool as hell and had plenty of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up.

The End.