Jokes and Giggles Part Two - Cover

Jokes and Giggles Part Two

Copyright© 2017 by Jack Spratt

Chapter 204

What’s the worst thing that can happen to a man?
Running into a wall while erect and breaking your nose.
✧ ✧ ✧

What employee evaluations really mean:

Character above reproach ... One step ahead of the law.
Exceptionally good judgement ... Lucky.
Great presentation skills ... Bullshitter.
Independent worker ... Nobody knows what he/she does.
Experienced problem solver ... Screws up often.
Relaxed attitude ... Sleeps at desk.
Career minded ... Back Stabber.
Quick thinking ... Offers plausible excuses for mistakes.
Zealous attitude ... Opinionated.
Meticulous attention to detail ... Nit picker.
Shows leadership qualities ... Big mouth.

✧ ✧ ✧

My answering machine message

My wife and I are busy right now.
I like going up-and-down.
My wife likes going side to side.
Leave a message and we’ll call you back when we get done brushing ourr teeth.

✧ ✧ ✧

Hillbilly Father takes his 16-year-old daughter to a doctor.
Doctor says. “What seems to be the problem?”
“Give this girl some of them birth control pills,” says the hillbilly dad.
“She’s only 16, is she sexually active?” asks the doc.
“Nah, she just lays there like her mama.”

 
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