Chapter 199

This one is compliments of icastu‎

Three men died in a common disaster and were just in past the pearly gates. As they were being processed in, they went to the transportation department.

The clerk at the department asked the first man, “What transportation do you need?”

“May I have a car?”

The clerk checked his computer screen and then said, “Well, you had pre-marital sex, several affairs, and barely made it in. I can give you a seven year old Dodge Dart.”

The second man asked for a car.

The clerk checked his screen and said, “Pre-marital sex, but only one affair. I’ll get you a Ford Taurus.”

The third man made the same request. The clerk looked at his screen and said, “Very good. No premarital sex and no affairs. I’m getting you Ferrari.”

Several days later, the other saw the man standing beside his Ferrari crying.

“What’s the matter? You have a dream car.”

“Oh, I know, but I just saw my wife go by on roller skates.”

Say thanks to Krista Torres for this one!

A woman goes to a psychiatrist and says; “Doctor, I feel like a failure as a parent! All 4 of my boys told me that they want nothing more out of life than to be valets!” The doctor pauses a moment and answers; “That’s the worst case of parking-sons I have ever heard of!”