Chapter 187

Moishe went out fishing. He had driven by lake many times before and had seen some other anglers about, so he decided to give his luck a try. On his first day of fishing he had no luck at all but noticed that another fisherman near him was scooping in one fish after another. Moishe had to know the secret.

“Excuse me, would you mind telling me what sort of bait you’re using?” he asked.

The other man looked around a bit embarrassed. “Well, I am a surgeon, and quite by accident I found that human tonsil works very well.”

Moishe couldn’t match that. He thanked the man and left.

Next day, Moishe returned to the lake, tried a different bait but still had no luck. Just as before, there ahead was another man reeling in fish after fish.

“Excuse me,” asked Moishe, “but could you suggest a bait that I could try?”

“Well, I can but I am not sure it will do you any good. I am a doctor and I’m using a bit of human appendix.”

“Hmm,” thought Moishe. “I can’t match that. It seems that the fish in this lake will require a little more effort than normal.”

He left, willing to give the lake one more try.

On the third day, Moishe still had no luck. As usual, there was another man near him bringing in lots of fish. Moishe had to confirm what he already knew.

“Excuse me sir, but are you a doctor?”

“No, I am a mohel.”

Freda and Moshe Levy won 8 million dollars the New York Lottery. They immediately went out to begin a life of living in luxury. They bought a luxurious apartment in Manhattan, surrounded themselves with all the material wealth imaginable and decided to hire a butler. After much searching, they found the perfect one.

One day, they instructed the butler to set up a dinner for four because they were inviting their friends, the Cohens, over for dinner and they will be going out for the day.

When they returned that evening, they found the table set for six. When they asked the butler why six places were set when they specifically instructed him to set the table for four, the butler replied: “The Cohens called and said that they were bringing the Bagels.”

The Navy and the Air Force decided to have a canoe race on the Potomac River. Both teams practiced hard and long to reach their peak performance before the race. On the big day, the Navy won by a mile. Afterwards, the Air Force team became very discouraged and depressed. The officers of the Air Force team decided that the reason for the crushing defeat had to be found.

A “Metrics Team,” made up of senior officers was formed to investigate and recommend appropriate action. Their conclusion was that the Navy had 8 seamen rowing and 1 officer steering, while the Air Force had 1 airman rowing and 8 officers and NCOs steering.

So the senior officers of the Air Force team hired a consulting company and paid them incredible amounts of money. They advised that too many people were steering the boat and not enough people were rowing.