Jokes and Giggles Part Two
Copyright© 2017 by Jack Spratt
Chapter 184
The race car driver picked up a girl after a race went home with her and took her to bed. He fell asleep only to be awakened suddenly when she smacked him in the face.
“What’s the matter?!? Didn’t I satisfy you when we screwed?” he asked.
“It was after you fell asleep that got you into trouble,” said the angry woman. “In your sleep, you felt my tits and mumbled, ‘What perfect headlights.’ Then you felt my thighs and murmured, ‘what a smooth finish.’”
“What’s wrong with that?” asked the driver.
“Nothing, but then you felt my pussy and yelled, ‘who the hell left the garage door open?’”
Little Johnny is sitting in class one day the teacher says, “I’m going to give you a letter of the alphabet and you need to give me a word that starts with that letter and use it in a sentence. OK, Let’s start with A”
Little Johnny raises his hand and shouts, “Teacher! Pick me! Pick me!”
The teacher thinks to herself, “I know what he’s going to say.” So she calls on another student.
Next, the teacher asks for the letters B, C, and D. and each time Little Johnny raises his hand the teacher ignores him and calls on other students. This continues until she reaches the letter U. By this time Little Johnny is almost jumping out of his seat. The teacher can’t really think of a bad word that starts with that letter. So she calls on him.
“U-R-I-N-A-T-E, urinate.”
The teacher rolls her eyes and says, “OK, now use it in a sentence.”
Little Johnny responds, “Urinate, but if you had bigger tits you would be a ten.”
Can’t sleep < SlappyYou >
Don’t you hate it when you can’t sleep because you are reminded of a mistake you made 2 years ago?
I hate it when my kid cries in the middle of the night!
Limerick An accident really uncanny Befell a respectable granny; She sat down in a chair While her false teeth were there And bit herself right in the fanny.
What did Fap say when he saw a dog licking his balls?...
Thanks.
Why does a dog lick his own balls?
Because he can.
To read the complete story you need to be logged in:
Log In or
Register for a Free account
(Why register?)
* Allows you 3 stories to read in 24 hours.