Chapter 146

From a friend of J & G.

A husband and wife were driving down a country lane on their way to visit some friends.

They came to a muddy patch in the road and the car became bogged.

After a few minutes of trying to get the car out by themselves, they saw a young farmer coming down the lane, driving some oxen before him.

The farmer stopped when he saw the couple in trouble and offered to pull the car out of the mud for $50.

The husband accepted and minutes later the car was free.

The farmer turned to the husband and said “You know, you’re the tenth car I’ve helped out of the mud today”.

The husband looks around at the fields incredulously and asks the farmer “When do you have time to plough your land? At night?”

No” the young farmer replied seriously “Night is when I put the water in the hole”.

A local charity realised that it had never received a donation from the town’s most successful lawyer. The volunteer in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to contribute.

“Our research shows that out of a yearly income of more than $600,000 you give not a penny to charity. Wouldn’t you like to give back to the community in some way?” The lawyer mulled this over for a moment and replied “First, did your research also show that my mother is dying after a long illness, and has medical bills that are several times her annual income?” Embarrassed, the charity rep mumbled “Um ... No”.

“Second, that my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair?” The stricken rep began to stammer out an apology but was put off.

“Third, that my sister’s husband died in a traffic accident” the lawyer’s voice rising in indignation “Leaving her penniless with three children?”

The humiliated rep, completely beaten, said simply “I had no idea...”

On a roll, the lawyer cut him off once again” ... and I don’t give any money to them, so why should I give any to you?!”