Chapter 139

Headlines

>From The Year 2030 -

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the second-largest country in the world, New India, formerly known as Canada...

- White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Canada’s third language...

- Children from 2-parent heterosexual families bullied in schools for being ‘different’ -- tolerance urged.

- Calgary schoolgirl expelled for not wearing burqa -- being Christian is no excuse, says school: Sharia law must be enforced...

- Japan announces it will no longer consume whale meat as whales are now extinct and the scientific research fleet is unemployed.

- Canada now has 10 universities of political correctness. Professor Goldman of ACLU says there is still a long way to go in the fight to stop people saying what they think...

- Canadian deficit $10 trillion and rising; Govt declares return to surplus in 100 years -- 300 years ahead of schedule. PM Mohammed Yousuf claims increased growth through more immigration is the secret to success...

- Wall Street banks merge to form new super bank, Goldman Rothschild Ebeneezer Epstein Drescher (GREED): Huge bonuses paid to executives to celebrate launch...

- The Leafs have finally given up hockey and are now taken up cricket and are importing players from India and Pakistan complete with families and friends.

- Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped...

- France pleads for global help after being taken over by Islamic countries -- no nation steps forward.

- Castro dies aged 104; Cuban cigars can now be imported to US legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned smoking...

- Canada Post raises price of stamps to $18 and cuts deliveries to Wednesdays only ... and yes they will be paid standby for rest of week. They are contemplating another strike for more perks.

- Global cooling blamed for wheat crop failure for third consecutive year in New India (Canada). They have been told that rice will not work here. Squatters could be part of the problem too?

- Supreme Court rules punishing criminals violates their civil rights: victims to share responsibility for crime...

- New law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers be registered by January 2035 as lethal weapons...

- Canadian Tax Office cuts tax rate to 85 per cent -- lowest in decades...

A pleasant thought from amandaserve‎18‎

From the Chapter Title to my story “My Name Was Joanne Swift”

Q: What does mom’s bathing suit have in common with Donald’s Trump hair?
A: They both barely cover the asshole.

Here is a short & nasty one ... From DaveA ‎

Three couples took a holiday together over a long weekend to put a bit of romance back into their lives.

At breakfast the first morning, they were all having breakfast when one guy said to his wife:

“Would you pass the honey honey”

Not to be outdone, the next guy said:
“Would you pass the sugar sugar”

And finally, the last guy said:
“Would you pass the tea bag”