The Dolphin

I am not sure why I continue to speak with these strange human creatures.

Kitik says it is stupid. He says their talk is shadow-talk. I know that he cares much for the human Jason, I see them in the water when Kitik plays with Jason, but it is not the same. I do not care for Maggie in the same way that Kitik does for Jason, but there is a feeling in me of sameness, as if she and I are alike in some way.

If that one wishes talk why does she not speak our speech, Kitik asks. I tell him she cannot say our speech, she does not even say our names right, only a little close. I try to say to her some of our speech, but she cannot say good. She does not understand how we speak all in small sounds. She does not even understand how it is different between the sounds we make for speaking and the sounds we make for hearing them back and knowing what is before us and around us. Because I can make her speech by playing with my breathing and using their way of making speech in small parts and putting the parts together, that is how I must speak to her.

But Kitik does not care about such things. He tells me there is a right way to speak and this one does not speak that way, this one does not speak in the now.

At first Kitik attends our talk. He wishes to go with me to where I travel in the mind, and I wish him to go with me as well. He tells me he hears the humans make these sounds when they care for him at the place where he is taken, the hos-pit-tall, but he does not understand the sense.

I think Kitik does not care to know the sense. I wish it were not so, but I know that it is. Kitik stays with me long as I speak with Maggie and the one she brings with her, but in time he wearies and goes to himself. If he is gone away long I go to him and tell him that I will be with him and not the humans. Sometimes he goes back to be with me as I speak to the humans. Sometimes he says to me to go back and he will rest, or he will play with Jason.

The one that Maggie brings is foolish like the other one to begin, and I tell that I will not speak foolish and go away. But Maggie asks me come back, and then that one begins to speak sense with me. I think this one is male, his voice is lower like Jason’s voice and I think that is a way of knowing. His name also has two sounds, but I learn that humans do not know the way of names so I must use other kinds of knowing.

It would be easier to know except the humans cover their bodies with things. I will ask Maggie why they do this.

I begin to speak with Maggie only to know about Kitik. Then I continue to speak with her to learn more about humans, whether they may wish us harm. Maggie says the one who hurt Kitik does that because its mind is in shadow, but I think that the minds of all humans are often in shadow.

But it is not the shadow of Acou where there is pain for him and he must strike at others. That one wishes hurt for Kitik because of the pain of its shadow, but Maggie and Jason and I think also the new one Jerry do not wish hurt for us, they are in another shadow that does not seem to make pain for them.

Kitik asks why do I go in shadow. I tell him that shadow is a part of how I come to find him and to be with him. He says it is good that shadow helps bring us together again, but now we are together and it is time to leave shadow.

But I live always in a part of shadow. I am in the now and it is good, but the now is not enough for me as it is for Kitik and for most. When it is slow and dull my mind drifts to shadow. Perhaps some part of this I take from my father, from Acou, but his shadow is different. Mine does not make pain in me.

The shadow of the humans’ speech is another different. I do not know if it is good or it is bad. I think maybe it is neither by itself. But I will learn more of this shadow, and then I may know better.