Chapter 29

Bobby came to me ... can you believe that? He came to me. I was fixing to tell him the bad news. Bobby, I’m going to be gone during Spring Break

“Karen,” he said.

“Bobby,” I said.

“The band has an offer,” he said.

“I’m going to be gone...” I said.

“What?” Twins.

“You go first,” I said ... be gracious ... give him that.

“Ladies first,” he said.

“Nope ... you started this. Finish it.”

“You know the old guy we met at the Paradise Ranch three weeks ago?”

“We meet lots of old guys when we play.”

“The really good shape tall one ... you were impressed.”

“Him? Yeah ... what about it?”

“He’ll put us up, feed us, pay us three grand a night, half the cover and 25% of the drinks if we’ll play his bar Spring Break.”

“Jees, Bobby ... I was just going to tell you I’d be busy Spring Break ... I wanna go south. I’m cold to the bone.”

“Where were you going to go?” Bobby asked.

“Fort Lauderdale.”

“Perfect!”

“Perfect?”

“Yeah, he owns The Laudermist ... on the beach ... Fort Lauderdale.”

“Fuck yeah?”

“Fuckin’ A.”

“I’m bringing friends with,” I said. “There’ll be three of us.”

“Who?”

“Hilda Gill...”

“Hilda ... Hilda of the bounteous boobs?” Bobby said, “You wouldn’t shit me? I been in lust with her since she was 12.”

“She’s too tall for you, Bobby.”

“Yeah, yeah yeah ... everybody says that. Who else?”

“Bethanne Mock.”

Bobby did the nose and milk thing.

When things cleared up and he cleared his sinuses, he said, “Excuse me ... you said Bethanne Mock?”

I nodded.

“Oh Fuck Oh Dear ... We went to different schools together. Bethanne Mock ... Really?”

“She’s making arrangements as we speak.”

“How do you know her? She never goes anywhere.”

“I bought her gold gear.”

“I been meaning to ask ... how is that going?”

“The architectural rock business is going good.”

“I mean the gold.”

“I recently sold fifty grand worth of Quartzite boulders, yellows and pinks, to a firm in Pontiac.”

“Karen...” he whined.

“They are going to use them as part of a cascade and Koi pond.”

“Karen?”

“Their client said the colors are perfect.”

“Karen ... you’re not going to tell me?”

“Tell you what?”

“Never mind.” He picked up the phone. “Here ... fill these orders.”

So I cooked eggs, hash browns, B&G, ham steaks, omelets, and a couple burgers while he talked on the phone.

“Gimme my spatula back, we’re set, he said.

“Somebody else will have to drive ... me an’ the girls are flying down.”

“NOW I’m jealous!”

I stopped at Albertson’s and picked up a magazine I had looked to but never bought. It was in a sealed black plastic wrapper. I drove home ... I had an idea.

Ripping off the cover I held my first ever Unique Homes magazine.

I started flipping pages. “Florida ... Florida ... Florida! Fort Lauderdale.” First house ... it was a doozy.

Gated Intracoastal point lot in exclusive XXX Beach. 400’ deep water dockage in no wake zone. Exquisite estate boasting 7 bedrooms, including separate guest house/staff quarters. Separate boat garage & storage. State of the art home theater, amazing walk-in wine cellar, 2 offices, steam shower, sauna, spa, commercial level gym, elevator. Vast covered outdoor living/dining/kitchen w/fireplace & sliding glass that brings the outside in. Custom resort-style pool. Stunning views.

Of course I called.

“Caldwell Banker?”

“I’d like to speak to any female agent, please.”

“Nancy Caruthers. May I help you?”

“My name is Karen Post. My bank information is ... xxxx ... xx ... xxxx Ranchester State Bank ... Please give them a call ... I’m interested in a listing, but it would help if you knew I was serious and had the necessary funds. Call me back as soon as you have verified me.”

I repeated my bank information and hung up.

Ring

“Hello, Karen Post speaking.”

“Colossal, huh.”

“The first Ft. Lauderdale listing in the September 1979 issue of Unique Homes. It’s an old issue ... but it’s what I have.”