Chapter 9: Models

My session with Dee was as close to the opposite of my session with Susan as we could get. We went to Kendra’s room after our last class and she was dancing around like she had to go to the bathroom. I let Kendra get her ready while I had my back turned. Dee had taken off her bra and hid it so I wouldn’t see her underwear. Go figure. Then she’d pulled her t-shirt up over her right shoulder, but kept it pulled down over her left breast so tightly that it was still tucked into her jeans. When I turned around to face her, she was sitting in Kendra’s desk chair with a towel draped over her right shoulder and breast.

“I’m so nervous I might have to pee,” she said. “Can you hurry?”

“I’ll do several drawings,” I said. “I’m trying to get from a technical drawing to an artistic rendering. It takes a few tries. I hope I can get there in one sitting.”

“I might have to do this more than once?”

“It gets easier, honey,” Kendra said. “By the third time I sat for him, I just walked in the room and pulled my shirt off. I didn’t even bother putting it on for breaks. The first time was pretty exciting, though. Here, let me take your towel and just sit there with your hands in your lap. You can ignore Art. That was my problem the first time I sat with him. Well, that was part of the problem. You know I always wear long sleeves and pants, right? It was the first time in a year I’d taken my shirt off in front of anyone, which meant no one had seen my tats.”

“You have tattoos?”

“Yeah. I got carried away when I turned eighteen and got several, including one that kind of circles my right breast. See?” She pulled her shirt up and showed the tat to Dee. Dee was fascinated and seemed to have forgotten about me as I drew one picture after another. Kendra kept pulling articles of clothing aside to show Dee more tats. Dee’s nipple had started off looking painfully hard. I knew quite a lot about stiffening of the nipple and how the sulci stretched to accommodate it and to expose more nerves, but I’d never seen a nipple that truly looked rock hard. As Kendra kept talking and kept Dee distracted, the nipple relaxed a little.

“Of course, the other thing about the first time was the excitement. I mean, in our society, girls don’t just show boys their nipples unless they expect some attention paid to them. What I didn’t realize was that Arthur would pay attention to them, he just wouldn’t touch them,” Kendra said. I saw Dee’s nipples hardening again. “When Arthur’s drawing, he pays more attention to my nipples than I can pay to myself when I’m masturbating.” Dee giggled at Kendra’s words and shifted in her seat. I saw her glance over at me as I shifted to her front and leaned in to sketch from a different angle. “How often does a guy just spend time examining and appreciating a girl’s nipples? And you can tell from his drawing that he is really paying attention. I discovered things about my own nipples that I never knew before.” Dee’s fat nipples were hard again and the left one seemed to strain against the fabric covering it. The word ‘engorged’ flashed across my mind. Kendra just kept talking, sometimes pointing things out to Dee and using her own nipples as an example. “My nipples always stick out a little, you know? I know some girls have nipples that just go completely flat, but mine always stick out.”

“Mine are like that. They’re so sensitive that even putting on a bra makes them hard,” Dee said. “If I touch them, they get like rocks.” Dee seemed to completely forget that I was there as she reached up and pinched her nipple, causing it to bloom even further.

“That’s exactly what I mean!” Kendra said. She pinched her own nipple, too. “And then when you realize that Art is right there watching your nipple get harder, it gets harder still. I don’t know about you, but when my nipples get hard, I get wet, too. So, I’m sitting there with my shirt off, almost more embarrassed about showing my tattoos than my nipples, in front of a boy and—even though he will say he’s not a boy, he’s an artist—I can’t help but look at him and know that this is a male who could do serious things to my libido, and he is seriously studying my right tit. I begin to think that I can actually feel him touching them with his eyes. And the more I imagine what it would be like if he was really touching them, the wetter I’m getting. I glanced down and could see a dark patch on my jeans between my legs where I was leaking. I was so embarrassed that I was sure he could smell me. I had to ask for a break so I could go jill myself off.”

“Yes!” Dee yelled. “I need a break, please.” She pulled her t-shirt down and ran out of the room to the bathrooms. Kendra started laughing.

“Did you get what you need or do you need us to keep going?”

“You are still a scary girl,” I said. “I have all I can take for today.”

“Yeah, I see. You better take that thing home for Annette and Morgan or I’ll be tempted to take care of it myself.” I snatched up my bag in front of me just before Dee came back through the door.

“Are we done?” she asked when she saw the bag held in front of me.

“Yeah,” I said. “Thank you, Dee.”

“Um ... It was no problem. Really. If um ... you want, I could come back for another sitting. You know. If you need more time.”

“Thank you. I’ll look over all the sketches tonight and let you know tomorrow. See you, Kendra!” I headed out.

By class time on Thursday, most of the campus had settled to a normal pace. We’d had two days of snow that left us wading through six inches as we moved from building to building and that always changes the way people move and act. I don’t just mean the occasional snowball fight or guys pulling girls around on big sheets of corrugated cardboard. Something about the blanket of white made things quieter on campus. After I left Dee and Kendra on Wednesday afternoon, I’d paused on the way to meet Annette after her late class to just draw the winter.

That probably sounds dumb. Words! It seems like when I want to use words to describe something, they run and hide from me. I stopped to look at snow drifted between the library and the gallery annex. It was caught between the two buildings and created little ripples until it mounded up against one building or the other. It was like drapery laid across the plaza. In the early evening light, it was a dreamscape.

The class was buzzing when I walked in and Dee was the central focus.

“Kendra just talked to me through the whole thing,” Dee was explaining. “I was so embarrassed that I was going to uncover my breast in front of a boy that I was doing all kinds of crazy things.”

“Like what?” Jim asked.

“Well, instead of taking my shirt off, I managed to get my bra off and then lift my shirt so just my right breast showed. But that wasn’t enough for my modesty. Oh, no! I had to drape a towel over it all until the second Art was in place and then lift it off. That was when Kendra started talking to me about her first experience and then ... showing me why she was more embarrassed than I was. And she talked about ... I’m not going to spoil it for anyone else, but I would do it all again in a second. In fact, I hope Art needs to have another sitting. Or two. Or ten.”

“Wow! You were so nervous yesterday, I didn’t think you’d go through with it,” Rachel said. “In fact, I was sort of hoping you’d chicken out and then I could because it wouldn’t just be me. Now I’m sitting here with my nipples aching instead of my hands shaking.”

“You know I’m going to have that visual image in my mind all day,” Jonathon said.

“Yes, me, too,” Prof Leitner said from the doorway. “Let’s continue our discussion about friendship and you can return to the modeling discussion after class.” We got ourselves turned in our seats and I put my sketchbook in front of me so I could sketch during class. I was a little distracted because my hand kept wanting to sketch snow or drapery around each picture. I noted the topic and started to draw. “Which of you can tell us a little about your first friend? Who was it? How did you become friends? Are you still friends? Who’ll start?”

I raised my hand and the class fell silent.

“Arthur?” Prof Leitner said. I think he was as surprised as I was. “Can you tell us about your first friend?” I nodded.

“Learned a lot about ... uh ... friends this week. Rob. He had the locker next to mine when we were ... seniors. I wasn’t very good at finding ... things ... classrooms. He just walked with me to my first class and was my lab partner. I ... didn’t understand ... friends. Only my sister before that. And our girlfriend. I got jealous ‘cause I thought he was stealing my girlfriend. He was just being a friend. We even ... uh ... double-dated a few times. I miss him.”

The class was quiet. I could see they wanted to ask questions, but I realized how much I missed him, even with the new friends I’d made.

“Where is your friend Rob now?” Prof Leitner asked.

“Followed his girlfriend to college in Timbuktu,” I said. The class laughed and I had a sudden inspiration. Kendra sat between Les and me. I reached over and took her hand and she jerked toward me to see what I wanted. “You are my second friend, Kendra. Ever.”

Dee practically begged me to do another sitting that afternoon. Well, I didn’t really mind. She was a little bigger than any of my other models and her breasts sagged a bit, but her nipples still pointed up. And they’d been very hard the last time we did this.

When we got to Kendra’s room, I expected a repeat of the previous day with Kendra talking and keeping Dee calm. The room was quiet and when I turned around, Dee was sitting in the chair with her shirt off and just her bra covering her breasts. She looked at me and met my eyes, then she shakily reached behind her and released the catch of her bra, letting it slide down her arms and onto her lap. I returned her shy smile.

“That does make it a lot easier on me,” I said. “Could you turn just a bit to your right so I can draw from this side?” She turned and I simply started drawing as I watched her nipple expand and harden as I drew.

“Kendra, I didn’t believe you when you said it was easier the second time,” Dee said. “I can imagine that after three or four times I could just walk in and strip without even thinking about it.” The girls were off and talking and pretty much ignoring me from that point.

It was great that she came back because I noticed things that I’d missed the first time. I’d been so intent on capturing the roundness and expansion of her nipple on Wednesday that I’d ignored other details about her breast. In addition to being bigger than any of the other girls I’d drawn, there were fine hairs scattered over her breast and, when I paused to observe, over her whole torso. They were very light and thin, but evenly spread everywhere right up to the areola. There were no hairs from the point where the color started to change inward. The hair gradually became denser below her navel before it disappeared beneath her belt. I couldn’t help but think she would be nice to pet.

The upper part of her areola wrinkled, but the lower part was smooth and taut. I realized it was the weight of her breast that pulled the bottom of it down, compressing the top back toward her chest. That was why her nipples pointed up. I wished I could lift them to feel the weight so I’d understand it better. Annette and Morgan would get felt up a lot tonight, even though they weren’t as big. And Susan.

Hmm. We were going to meet on Sunday and Zen was going to video me posing her. She said it would take a while to edit the piece together and we might have to repeat some things so she could get better light or angles. But it had been made pretty clear to me that I should be ... physical with Susan while I was posing her. I’d be thinking about how the weight of her breasts compared to the weight of Annette and Morgan’s breasts. Weight was the key to the shape of Dee’s breast.

“How often can you fit me into your schedule to pose?” Dee asked. I looked up at her face for the first time since we started.

“You want to do it again?”

“I’m discovering things about myself,” she said. “Last night, I must have stood in front of the mirror in the bathroom for half an hour looking at my breasts. I kept trying to imagine what you see when you look.” I turned my most recent sketch to face her. It was a view looking across her meridian to the inside of her breast. “Wow. I have to tell you, that’s um ... a lot nicer than what I see when I look in the mirror. I’d like to pose for other body parts if you decide to do more. Just so I can see myself take shape through your eyes.”

I couldn’t draw all weekend. I had homework and reading to do just like everyone else. We were still in the survey portion of the painting class where we were introduced to the differences among watercolor, gouache, pastel, oil, and acrylic. Of course, there are other media, but those are the major ones that they use for the intro painting class. My advantage was that I could do the gouache/watercolor comparison paintings at home instead of in the college studio. Students who weren’t actually into painting didn’t have the materials and used the ones supplied in the college studio. I helped Kendra with her project in my studio and loaned her the materials.

Friday afternoon, when I didn’t have classes, Mavis came over. Kendra and Morgan worked together to do some modeling of the aura in clay. They had some interesting comments.

“Remember Susan was all self-contained in her aura until Zen came over?” Morgan said. “And you, Miss I’m-just-a-friend. The aura around your nipples was trying to get into Art’s mouth.” Kendra blushed.

“It turned me on!”

“It turned Susan on, too. But the thing was that with Mavis, there was a definite connection, but it wasn’t sexual. The—I think I’ve decided to call it the blossom—the blossom of her aura came from her eyes when she looked at Art.”

“Should I do something?” I asked. I was a little panicked. I got turned on as soon as Mavis took her shirt off. I got myself under control as I started focusing on drawing, but that was the first nipple I’d seen other than Annette’s and Morgan’s that I wanted to lean forward and suck.

“You’re doing fine, Pen,” Fay said. “We’re pushing you to expand your repertoire and to draw more models. I can’t imagine any guy, including any artist and possible gay men, too, who wouldn’t have responded to Mavis’s breast. My god! It was perfect. It’s possible that no one has observed the differences in auras before, let alone attempting to document them in 3-D.”

Mavis had left with a schedule to have another sitting next week.

On Saturday, Jim came over for a couple hours. That was something. I didn’t think it was possible for anyone to be more embarrassed about taking off his shirt than Dee had been. I drew about 30 sketches of his right nipple and when he got his shirt on his sigh of relief was audible to all four of us. He didn’t volunteer for another sitting.

Sunday, Zen and Susan came to the studio and we worked the entire afternoon to tape what Zen said would be about ten minutes of video when she was done editing. Yeah, I got to feel up Susan, repeatedly, but we had so much stopping and starting that I never did get to draw anything. Susan tracked Zen with her eyes the entire time I was posing her and I still don’t think she got turned on at all. It took us four hours and Zen wasn’t particularly happy with what she’d captured.