Chapter 3: The Way Forward and Beyond

“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You’re on your own. And you know what you know. You are the guy who’ll decide where to go.” – Dr. Seuss

Turning 18 is a milestone in one’s life, especially for a boy. He suddenly becomes an adult and is allowed to do many things, such as getting a driver’s license. So, to commemorate Danny’s eighteenth birthday, we decided to get him a car. It was a used car, but that didn’t matter to Danny. It had four wheels and could take him places.

One of the places we suggested was the newly opened wellness and recreational spa for nudists, primarily families and married couples, called The Four Seasons. In addition to the car, we gave him a one-year membership to the spa. On the first weekend, we all decided to go together to spend hours in the pool and sauna. Most of Danny’s nudist friends joined within days, too. A few parents went on one-day passes while others were unnecessarily worried about body image and too embarrassed to go. In the meantime, the pool and fitness room down at the annex of our apartment building quickly became a thing of the past.

We thought Danny had forgotten our rule about inviting his female nudist friends over to our home, but he surely didn’t. He was very smart about reminding us and getting our approval. At The Four Seasons, he would present us to a girl’s parents and leave us alone to talk, while he and the girl went somewhere to have fun. There were very few specific requests, such as only weekend visits and no sleep-overs. Danny and the girls whose parents agreed with the arrangements were happy like little kids.

It didn’t take long for our home to look like a social nudist club. Usually, Danny had more girls over than guys. We quickly learned that the girls preferred to be with Danny. However, it was all serious and little play. Most of the time, they spent preparing for some college entrance exam and exchanging ideas about writing essays for their college applications. Danny’s mom recalled when Danny would ask Becky if she wanted a peanut butter-jelly sandwich and now, listening to him talk about meal plans at such-and-such college, sounded almost unreal.

When they weren’t talking about their college plans, they were exchanging stories about their experiences at Naturist resorts and beaches, dancing to music, telling jokes, and even talking about serious things like politics, the latest school gossip, and who was dating who. There were times when our family room looked and sounded more like a harem, teeming with all the feminine charm and chatter.

Danny and Tammy would often talk on the phone to also exchange ideas about their college preferences. Tammy was making plans to attend a college out West to study psychology and specialize in child development. There was a nudist colony nearby the college which was offering weekend employment to students. It was the ideal set up for her.

Danny did extremely well on his first college entrance exam and received early acceptance letters from two universities, including the one from which I graduated. He was interested in majoring in business administration and ended up selecting my alma mater. His decision made me very proud, plus we looked forward to go visit him for homecoming football games. Go Team!

“It is easy to decide on what is wrong to wear to a party, but deciding what is right is much trickier.” – Lemony Snicket

Danny and his nudist male friends adopted a special name for their group, calling themselves the Bare Bums. They toyed with Nude Dudes, which was too obvious, and Dan-D Lions, which sounded gay which they were not.

Their nudist female friends, on the other hand, called themselves Fanny Friends. Danny told us it wasn’t easy to become a member of the Fanny Friends circle, yet had no idea what criteria the girls used. He felt it probably wasn’t any different from the guys’. To this day, however, I still don’t know what it was.

Like high schools all across the country, Danny’s organized their annual Senior Prom for the end of April. Danny had no intention of going. He didn’t know who to ask, nor did he feel comfortable getting all suited up in a tuxedo. Apparently, his Bare Bums friends felt the same way and they all made plans to spend the evening together at the Four Seasons.

Weeks prior to the prom, Danny received an invitation from Monica, one of the Fanny Friends, asking him to go with her to a Morp, which stood for Prom spelled backwards. We later discovered that students in many high schools had been staging a social event as an alternative to their school’s official prom, which generally was not under the control of the school. Morps did not follow any prescribed format. A Morp was a super fun, backwards prom. Instead of dressing super fancy and such, students dressed really crazy and fun, and a lot more casual than for a real prom. It provided students who felt disconnected from prom culture to express their lifestyle preferences. Morp participants not only wanted their evening to be fun and enjoyable, but which also served as an assertion of solidarity and legitimacy of their social difference. Moreover, in keeping with the reversal concept, the girls ask the guys to go with them.

So it was no surprise when some of the other Bare Bums received a similar invitation from a Fanny Friend. The Morp was being organized at the home of one of the girls, Harriet, and all the parents knew each other from their naked encounters at the Four Seasons.

There were four girls, all seniors. Each of these kids were incredible, beautiful and with unique personalities. To be even-handed and on the up and up, Danny’s mom was tasked to describe the boys and I the girls. Fair, right?

Harriet was a frisky girl with a Tom-boy appearance and small breasts who loved yoga. She looked pale because of her dark, Gothic-style hair. She was au naturel with thick eyebrows and very bushy, unruly pubic hair. She shaved her legs and arms, but not her pubes, nor her armpits. Her beau was Andrew, the athlete, witty, good-natured and always ready with a joke. His penis was short, but offset by his bull-like, low hanging balls. He had a nice crop of hair, always combed neatly, yet sparse down below, which was more than compensated by Harriet’s overcrowded forest.

Eva was a dreamy-eyed beauty with a supermodel body. She had slender hips, long legs and perky breasts. She was an avid member of the swim team. She had wavy hazel brown hair and kept her pubic coif neatly trimmed. Her yen was Christopher, a tall, lanky boy enhanced by his huge, long, uncircumcised penis. He had a quiet disposition, rarely smiled and looked too serious for his youth. He preferred an uncombed, wet look hairstyle for his dark hair which gave him a bad-boy appearance.

Grace was a petite Japanese-American from Hawaii. Always smiling, she had a sunny attitude, beautified by her small, perky breasts and small patch of fuzzy pubic hair. She loved to play tennis, which kept her body in good shape, and usually kept her long, silky dark hair tied in a ponytail. She had a crush on Yasuki. He and his family had recently come from Japan and brought their Naturalist traditions with them. He was well tanned with a slender build and, contrary to popular belief, an above average size penis which was never flaccid and steadfastly pointed at an angle to his right.

Then there was Monica, a darling, delightful, doll-faced girl with honey blond hair, dreamy blue eyes and creamy light skin. She had a well-proportioned body with nice curves and hand-full size breasts. Her body was covered with barely noticeable peach fuzz and she was completely bald and smooth down below, making it possible to discern a cute dimple at the top of her slit which matched the ones on her face. Danny didn’t notice, but she was enamored with him for his innocent, boyish looks, charming smile, and dark, thick hair that arched across his forehead. The exercises in the fitness room gave him broad shoulders, strong arms, muscular chest, and a chiseled waist, all culminating with a handsome, thick penis, which surely must have made Monica tingle and wet.

The highlight of the Morp evening was a kind of show-and-tell. Each one had to bring something unusual or special that belonged to each and talk about it.

Harriet had a deck of cards from 1913 which featured the derriere of a naked woman. The cards belonged to a great-aunt called Fanny, hence the name Fanny Friends.

Eva brought two dolls from her collection of over 18, one for each birthday. She received the pair – a boy and a girl – which her parents gave her on her tenth birthday to have “The Talk.” Underneath the clothes of the boy doll was an anatomically correct penis with testicles, while the girl doll, a perfect vagina.

Grace showed a sign she swiped from her favorite nudist resort and hung it on her bedroom door. It read, “Nudist Area – Please Remove All Clothing Before Entering.” Nobody in her family needed a warning.

Monica had a magical flute that her great-grandmother brought over from France. She said that if the right notes were played it would make all the boys’ “snakes” rise. She blew a few notes, but it didn’t have any effect on the boys, except Yasuki. Who knows what he heard?

Andrew showed everyone a trophy for winning first place at a nudist pageant when he was 13. He also had a photo as proof showing a girl with her hand on his shoulder staring down at his most prominent feature which he thought for sure gave him the winning title.

Christopher donned a ceremonial warrior’s hat that he found at a bazaar visiting Mongolia with his parents. It was colorful with real fur around the edge and would have been worn by a groom to his wedding. The girls insisted that the other three boys try it on to see who looked more eligible.

Yasuki brought an actor’s mask that belonged to his grandfather who was an opera singer in the Imperial Japanese Opera. He looked scary when he wore it.

Danny asked Harriet to turn off the lights to show them a brief he got from his Ukrainian friend that was treated to glow in the dark. It lit up the party, but they all told him that he looked “indecent” and insisted he take it off.

Everyone also had to bring along a funny photo of themselves when they were kids. The photos were pinned to a bulletin board and they first had to guess who it was. The person then would explain or describe what was happening at the time the picture was taken.

Harriet was 9 when her sister caught her trying on a bikini bra with a look of discomfort and embarrassment. The bra was way too big for her buds.

Eva was 8 when her dad spotted her climbing onto a huge Moses-like statue at a park. It was somewhere in Europe and nobody cared that she was naked.

Grace’s photo showed her doing a headstand during recess in the fourth grade with her skirt turned upside down covering her head and exposing a bit too much at the other end. She forgot to put on her panties that day.

Monica, 11, was riding piggyback on her 13 year-old cousin Jake, however upside down on his front, doing “knick-knacks paddy whacks” on her bottom, she looking up at his “golden nuggets,” and he down at her “Bermuda triangle” and “pink starfish.”

Andrew was 8 and at a nudist beach when his funny photo was taken. His sister buried him in the warm sand but left two heads sticking out, the one connected to his neck and the other connected to his penis.

Christopher was 12 when he was attacked bending over in the shower by his 6-year-old brother with the toilet plunger. It was a good thing the little guy came at him with the suction-cup which ended up stuck to one of Christopher’s buttocks.

Yasuki was trying on the head piece of his Rudolf-the-Red-Nosed-Reindeer costume for a sixth grade Christmas school play. There was another rosy-red, nose-like button at the end of a stubby erection. He said he used lipstick to improve the color of the Rudolf nose and got carried away.

Danny was 7 visiting his cousins when he lost a bet and had to pay the price by wearing a blond wig. He looked like a cute, flat-chested girl with a penis.

The party lasted all night until five in the morning. They played games in the pool, danced a lot, watched movies, and ate a ton of pizza. It was a smash, one they would never forget, celebrating their achievements, their memories, and their uniqueness.

“The journey doesn’t start at the beginning, it starts at the end.” - Renee Thompson

... and so, the day finally arrived for Danny to graduate from high school. His mother and I were proud and sad at the same time; proud because it marked the start of a new journey for Danny; sad because the journey of boyhood was coming to an end. Eighteen years seem like a long time. To him, those years were timeless and eternal like there was no tomorrow. To us, those wondrous years were all too short; gone in the blink of an eye; a part of yesterday; irredeemable. Nevertheless, with Danny around, we found energy, meaning, expression, and life. That’s why it was so hard to let go.

Although Danny and his Bare Bums and Fanny Friends went to the school’s graduation party, they wanted to do something more memorable since it would be their last time together and have fun in their own special way. They scheduled their party to take place two days after graduation since many of them would be leaving for summer jobs or family vacations.

Danny suggested they spend a whole day with a sleep over at Lake Haven where he was able to get a reduction in the fee for a maximum of 18 people. The idea was met with unanimous approval by everyone including the parents. The party would be in a safe location where everyone had to arrive together by a certain time and could not leave until noon the next day. There would be no drinking since alcohol was not permitted by the camp. Moreover, we parents were confident there would be no undesirable behaviors because our sons and daughters regarded nudism as a lifestyle not as a license for sex, as opposed to others who find it difficult to understand that Naturists can actually hang out naked without jumping on each other.

Eventually, eight Bare Bums and seven Fanny Friends decided to go. Danny and three other friends organized a car pool for all 15. Everyone stayed in one cabin nearest the indoor pool. The other facilities such as the volleyball and tennis courts and the large tent where they could party all night were not far away.

As soon as they arrived at Lake Haven they quickly got undressed and headed straight for the lake. There were some who couldn’t wait and already had their clothes off in the car. Afterwards, some played tennis, volley ball or basketball, while others ping pong or shooting air guns. It was as if everyone regressed to the time they were in middle school having a blast on the playground.

After lunch, a few tried to relax in hammocks or lie down on beach towels under a shady tree, but there were so many other activities and the fun was too contagious to just loaf and lie around. Some tried for the first time to ride a horse, others hitting a golf ball or wandering off to explore the nearby trails.

Everybody looked forward to the dance party that evening when the real excitement would begin. They equally danced to freestyle and slow music, and, after the initial unwilling, spontaneous erections, all the boys were able to control themselves. The girls calmly took it all in stride without teasing them or poking fun at the steadfast ones. They knew that a true nude dude is neither trying to be lewd nor rude. Try saying that real fast!

They too decided to bring pictures of themselves when they were little and everyone had to guess who it was. It was easy to pick out Mary Jo and Dale, the only black kids among them. However, everybody teased Dale not about his big Afro hairstyle, but about what he was trying to hold down between his legs that day when the picture was taken.

It was also easy to guess which one was Adam’s by the fig leave he was holding to cover up his penis, as well as Andrew’s by the athletic cup he was wearing. Among the girls, they got the two blonds – Julia and Monica – right. They also got Harriet right because of her dark eyebrows. Nobody was able to guess Danny’s picture and they all cracked up, especially the girls, when it was the one with the two-year-old sitting on the floor and eating cereal with his penis hanging over the edge of the bowl.

Way past midnight, before everybody turned in for the night, they watched the much talked about movie The Blue Lagoon. Nick’s dad was a film critic and was able to get a DVD months before it was released to the public in 1999. They had heard a lot about the film, but weren’t yet allowed to go see it due to its sexual content. It was natural for them to be curious. Who isn’t at 18? Even a nudist likes to see something original and exciting which celebrates the coming of age and the awakening of two people to their bodies, their feelings and their love.

“The world would be so lonely, in sunny hours or gray, without the gift of friendship, to help us every day.” - Hilda Brett Farr

If seeing your child graduate from high school is a day filled with emotions, dropping your child off at college is anguish. It is one of the biggest milestones of your child’s life and a parent’s day of reckoning having to let your child go. For Danny’s mom, it was like cutting the umbilical cord for the second time. When Danny was a baby, she would fantasize seeing her life as a mother unfold in fast-forward motion, visualizing all the milestones in Danny’s life from his first steps all the way to his wedding day. Now all she wanted to do was press the rewind-stop-play buttons to recapture his growing-up years and live them all over again.

Although we talked with Danny about roommates, campus safety, health, drinking and yes, even sex, it was really all about the tangled emotions we felt, contemplating the changing routines of the house, how time had flown, how old we were, and the hope we had prepared him for life.