Chapter 33: Wednesday, Mischa

Editor’s Note:
The next page is another extract from the journal of Mischa Doeple, dated Wednesday December 8th.

Bec had a really bad dream last night. The way I know that is because she suddenly sat up and started gasping for breath. She didn’t scream or anything but she was totally panicking. Bec sitting up woke me because when she pushed herself upright, one of her hands pushed down on my chest. I was sleeping when that happened. Having someone suddenly push down on your chest like that would probably wake up most people.

Once I got my head around what was going on, I sat up and put my arms around Bec and hugged myself to her back. My chest was against her back and my arms were around her ribs and I could feel her heart thundering at full pace from both directions. She kept gasping and shaking her head. Then she stopped gasping and started crying. I rocked her back and forth and told her everything was okay.

Eventually she seemed to stop crying and we were sitting there in the bed and I wondered what would happen now. So I said, “Is there anything I can do?”

She didn’t say anything but she reached over and grabbed her drawing pad and pencil. I pressed the light switch beside the bed and blinked against the sudden light. She drew for maybe 2 minutes and then handed me the page. I could see a cartoon drawing of a little cat with big wide eyes and a thought bubble over its head full of jagged lines, then the shrink’s head with little arms and legs. Next to it were 2 little discs and then the same little cat lying down and it seemed to be sleeping.

Bec pointed at the cartoon shrink and used her hand to mime talking. So I said, “You want to talk to the shrink.” And she nodded.

Then she pointed at the discs and pointed into her open mouth and then mimed sleeping. So I said, “You want some pills so you can sleep?” And she nodded.

I said “Okay.” Then I levered myself out of bed and padded out to talk to the nurses on night duty.

One of the nurses was sitting at the desk. She said, “What’s the problem, sugar?” So I showed her Bec’s drawing and I said, “Bec is having bad dreams. She wants to talk to the shrink and she wants to have some pills to help her sleep.”

The nurse looked doubtfully at the drawing so I pointed at each bit in turn and I said, “Look, dreams, shrink, pills, sleep. It’s not complicated.”

She looked at me and she said, “Bec drew this?”

So I said, “Yes.”

The nurse looked at the pictures again and laughed. Then she stuck the pictures up on her little noticeboard and looked up something on the computer. Then she put a pill in a little cup and half-filled a plastic cup with water. She walked over to our room with me trailing behind her and sat down on the edge of the bed next to Bec.

The nurse said, “What’s the matter, sugar? Are you having trouble sleeping?”

Bec looked a mess with her hair straggling all over her face. She nodded and set her hair swaying.

The nurse said, “Doctor Koehler is off duty at the moment. He’ll be back in the morning. There is a doctor on night duty that we can call if we need to. Would you like to talk to her?” Bec shook her head.

Then the nurse said, “Doctor Koehler approved tablets for you if you asked for them. This one will help you sleep through until morning. Is that what you want?”

Bec nodded so the nurse handed Bec the pill which she swallowed with a mouthful of water. Then Bec lay down again and turned away from us. The nurse lifted the sheet and turned to me. She said, “In you hop, sugar. Or do you want to sleep over in your own bed tonight?”

So I crawled in next to Bec and the nurse tucked the sheets down around us. The nurse turned the light off and left and soon after that I went back to sleep.

Wednesday morning went pretty much the same as it had the last few days. Toilet and shower with Bec then breakfast with Bec and Alice. Bec was doped but aware of what was going on around her but she didn’t talk much. She did give the occasional one word answers to questions so she could talk. She just didn’t want to talk so Alice and I did most of the talking at breakfast.

Then the shrink came and took Bec away and I did my exercises under the careful eye of my physical therapist.

Editor’s Note:
The next pages are notes taken by Dr Koehler, dated Wednesday, December 8th.

Notes of meeting, Nurse Cassandra, Wednesday, 12/8, 9:02am

NC: Good morning, Dr Koehler

Dr K: Hello, Cassandra. What do you have for me today?

NC: Let’s start with Bec. Apparently she had a rough night. She sent Mischa out with a message for you. It gave the night staff a few laughs.

Dr K: Why? I don’t understand.

NC: Here’s the message. As you can see, the message is clearly for you. The staff suggests this drawing could replace your photo in the computer system. It’s a very good likeness.

Dr K: Very amusing. Somehow, I don’t see the hospital administration approving the use of cartoon images but you’re welcome to ask. I’m sure Bec would be happy to draw entertaining cartoons of you and the other nurses as well. Would you like me to ask her?

NC: Ah, yes, well. Perhaps the hospital isn’t ready for cartoons in place of photos in our files.

Dr K: If you insist. Now this message is clearly asking for pills. Was Bec supplied with pills?

NC: You had pre-approved medication in case she asked for it so that was administered. It’s all in the file. And the cartoon of you was a request to talk to you so she was told you would see her this morning.

Dr K: I’ll put her session first in my schedule. What else do we have?

((notes re other patients deleted))

Transcript of Patient Interview, Rebecca Freeman, Wednesday, 12/8, 9:14am

Dr K: Good morning, Bec. I believe you asked to talk to me.

Bec: (nod)

Dr K: How can I help you?

Bec: I seem to be having a problem.

Dr K: What sort of problem?

Bec: I’m having a problem with zombies. I’m seeing them everywhere.

Dr K: That’s interesting.

Bec: I tell you I’m seeing zombies and that’s all you say?

Dr K: Are they hallucinations?

Bec: I certainly hope so. If the zombies I’m seeing aren’t hallucinations, then this hospital has a serious problem. Not to mention America. This could be the start of the zombie apocalypse.

Comment: She looked at me and grinned, then shrugged.

Bec: Or I could be hallucinating.

Dr K: Can you give me an example of when you are seeing zombies?

Bec: Okay. One example was yesterday afternoon. I was playing Uno with Mischa and Dan and Pearl and Tara. I looked down at my cards because it was my turn and I looked up and saw that I was playing cards with a group of zombies.

Dr K: Interesting. What did you do?

Bec: I didn’t hesitate. I’m a girl of action. I played to make the zombie on my left skip a turn and pick up 2 cards.

Dr K: Of course you did. And did that defeat the zombie?

Bec: Well, no. But I did stop it from winning the game so that counts, doesn’t it?

Dr K: How often have you seen these zombies?

Bec: Once yesterday afternoon, then again yesterday evening. And then last night they attacked me when I was in the supermarket buying milk.

Dr K: What supermarket? You were buying milk?

Bec: We were in the supermarket because we were making pancakes and we ran out of milk – Tara and Angie and me. Then all the customers turned into zombies and started chasing us. The zombies caught Tara and Angie but when I tried to go back to help them I couldn’t do it. It was like I was frozen in place and all I could do was watch while the zombies attacked Angie and Tara.

Dr K: That doesn’t sound very good.

Bec: That time might have been a dream.

Dr K: Might have been a dream?

Bec: It’s sometimes hard to tell if I’m dreaming or not. But given that we were in a supermarket and then we got attacked by zombies and then I woke up sitting in my bed, I figured that there was a good chance it was a dream.

Dr K: That sounds like reasonable logic.

Bec: Of course, I only figured that out after I woke up. At the time it seemed very real. But don’t worry about the dream, I’ve been having dreams like that all my life.

Bec: I’m worried about the zombies hanging around me during the day. Can you help me get rid of the zombies?

Dr K: I’m told that chopping off their heads usually works.

Bec: Very funny. Given that I’m seeing zombies instead of my friends and family, I’m going to pass on that option.

Dr K: I don’t have a magic wand that I can wave and have the zombies vanish.

Bec: That’s a pity. A magic wand would be really useful right now.

Dr K: Your brain is very complicated. This is clearly a manifestation of what you experienced last Monday.

Bec: Wow Dr K. I can’t imagine why I didn’t think of that.

Dr K: Are you telling me that I was stating the obvious?

Bec: Yes. Even a blind monkey could have a figured that one out. I think you rate a bit above blind monkey standard.

Dr K: Thank you. It’s good to hear that you consider me better than a blind monkey. In the example you gave, you saw zombies where there were actual people and they were doing what the actual people were doing. Has that been the case each time you had these hallucinations?

Bec: Yes. Unless you count the dream.

Dr K: We could try drugs, but you don’t like taking drugs. Or, we could try hypnotism. It may take several sessions with no real guarantee of success. Or, we could try something a little more radical.

Bec: I’m listening.

Dr K: You have a highly developed visual memory and the ability to sketch quickly and accurately. Why don’t you try this? Next time you see zombies, pull out your pad and sketch the real people who were there and sketch them doing what you know they were doing.

Bec: You think that I can force my brain to see the real people instead of the zombies. You want me to use my visual memory of what I should be seeing to overwhelm the hallucinations. That’s an interesting idea.

Dr K: It’s a theory. Let’s call it an experiment. If the experiment doesn’t work, we could always try hypnotism – or drugs – or something else.

Bec: Fair enough. I’ll give it a try.

Dr K: Now perhaps we should talk about why you think the zombies are there.

Bec: I’ve already figured that one out. I was worried about the grandfather coming back to life and attacking me. Dead people who come back to life sounds like the definition of zombies to me.

Dr K: Are you still worried about your grandfather coming back to life?

Bec: No. That was when I was half crazed because of the situation I was in the middle of.

Dr K: So do you have a theory about why you’re seeing them now?

Bec: Given that it’s such a short time since I actually remembered that experience, I think my brain is reacting as if it’s just happened.

Dr K: I’m surprised you aren’t more focused on other images.

Bec: The zombies are the last thing I remembered. I’ve had longer to get used to the other stuff. Not much longer, I admit, but I drew the zombies last. Everything else makes sense but they don’t. My brain can’t extinguish that memory of zombies moving around me because I don’t understand them. I think it’s because I don’t understand what was really happening around me when I thought I was seeing zombies.

Dr K: I do have an email from Liz that I never showed you. In the email, she describes her experiences on that Monday evening. Has she spoken to you about that day?”

Bec: No. You told them all not to talk about that.

Dr K: Okay then. I’m fairly sure that she arrived at your house at about the same time you started seeing zombies. I’ll print out the whole email for you. If you read that it should give you a better understanding of what happened after you started losing touch with reality. Now that you’ve been through your interview with the detective, your statement won’t be corrupted so there’s no longer that concern. And nothing in the email from Liz should cause the problems we discussed to do with corrupting your memory since we already know that you were hallucinating.

Bec: Okay, that would be good. So I’ll read the email and I’ll try your idea about sketching the reality to drive away the zombies. Between those two things, hopefully I can get rid of those pesky things.

Dr K: You’ve been talking to me in a fairly bright and energetic way but overall I sense that you are a little down today compared to normal.

Bec: Yes. I don’t know why but I’m feeling low today. It’s nothing to do with the zombies. It’s just me being moody as far as I can tell. If I knew why I was depressed I could do something about it.

Dr K: I see. Well, try not to withdraw into yourself. Stay in touch with what is going on around you. If you figure out why you are depressed, then we can talk about it and work through it together.

End of Session

Editor’s Note:
The next page is another extract from the journal of Mischa Doeple, dated Wednesday December 8th.

The shrink brought Bec back and took me away for a session. We didn’t talk about food at all. The whole session was about my uncle and my cousins and all of that stuff. It was pretty draining and there’s no point writing it out here since the shrink already knows exactly what we talked about.

When I got out of my session with the shrink, Bec’s mother and grandmother were sitting on a sofa. Bec was curled up with her head on her mother’s lap and her mother was quietly playing with her hair. Angie was in front of the sofa singing some sort of song which had lots of actions and jumping around to go with the words. I sat down facing them and watched Angie do her dance.