Chapter 9

I woke the next morning and smiled in the darkened room. I could hear Emma breathing, but more than that, I could feel her curled against me. I felt like I was on top of the world. Even the horrific events of last night couldn’t ruin my mood. I twisted my head to look at the clock and saw we had about another 20 minutes. I relaxed and let myself wake up slowly, breathing deeply and feeling more contented and at peace than I’d felt since the girls had left.

I examined it and thought that I was actually happier here with this one woman than I’d been with four before. This past month had given me an appreciation for the simple acceptance that she’d shown to me in the wake of Miranda. I silently wondered how long her death would stain my life.

Then I realized I didn’t feel guilty any more. I’d paid for her death with the life I’d built in its wake. The money meant so little now with most everything paid for by the grant, that I could only use very small amounts. I’d lost the girl I grew up loving, lost my best friend, lost my sister, lost my mother, lost Collie who’d walked away from me in disgust even though she couldn’t function independently and lost Tabby who had dragged the worst of my darkness out into the light of day and had bared her own to me. Six bonds I would have bet anything couldn’t have been broken and yet they were all shattered. Through it all, this one woman had forged a new one with me, drawing me to her even as others pushed me away, revolted by me.

I was grateful for her. My recent experiences had taught me that nothing is forever and I hoped she’d stay, but if she went, I wanted to have as many happy memories with her as I could get and I hoped to God that if we couldn’t make it work, we could part fondly and not taint those memories.

I smiled and put thoughts of losing her out of my head. Instead, I wrapped myself in a momentary imagining of how she’d look on our wedding day. I felt a shiver run through me as I pictured her in a shimmering white gown, smiling at me on her way down the aisle. It was a good way to start the day.

When the alarm went off, she raised her head sleepily and I kissed her. “Morning Love,” I said softly.

“Coffee...” she slurred and slumped back to bed.

I grinned and reached for her sides, tickling her softly, making her shriek and jump, slapping me on the chest. “Shower and pants. Then coffee and breakfast,” I promised.

I kissed her deeply and then got up to turn on the lights. That made her squawk in protest and shade her eyes as she adjusted. She was breathtaking. She was bare except for the panties and my mouth watered for her. I took her hand and led her to the bathroom, still blinking and moaning about more sleep. She delayed long enough to grab her bathroom kit from her bag. I started the shower and she looked at it with interest. “That’s handy for entertaining,” she said with a laugh and then looked shocked when I grinned at her.

“What?” I asked. Instead of answering me, she took my shoulders and stood me in front of the mirror. I’d bruised through the night and I’d clearly been in a fight of some kind. “I bet that hurts,” I commented, looking in the mirror. Finally I shrugged. “Not much I can do about it. Unless I invest in make-up. I don’t think I’m quite ready to do that though.”

I stripped off my shorts and got into the shower, standing under the warm spray. A moment later, I felt her arms around me and I turned to face her. I kissed her deeply and started washing her hair, making note of what shampoo she used. I’d had plenty of practice in washing a girl’s hair this summer. She groaned in pleasure as I gently massaged her scalp and then rinsed the lather from her hair before conditioning. She was in heaven when I repeated. I washed her body lovingly, using her body wash to lather her skin, smiling at her as I worked my way down her body and legs until I had her sit and washed her feet completely.

When she stood up, I bent my head and gave her nipple a quick swipe with my tongue, making her gasp. “You are so getting paid back on Saturday, Mister,” she promised, but took the opportunity now to return the favor, using her shampoo to wash my hair, whispering that she wanted me to smell like her all day. Then she did the same with her body wash and ran her hands all over my body. She admittedly took her time and made certain parts of my anatomy extra clean and left me practically trembling as payback for a simple lick. Well two could play at that game. Saturday might be more than she bargained for.

I turned off the hot water and she screamed in surprise. “Sorry. Suddenly I need a cold shower,” I told her and stood under the freezing spray until I didn’t feel quite so turned on.

She laughed and ran out of the shower, grabbing a towel and drying off quickly. I followed her, shivering and got myself dried off enough to go get dressed. I picked up the shirt she’d left for me last night and smirked when I read the word PORNSTAR in bold, sparkling letters. I shrugged and put it on. I figured it was appropriate given the production Beck and Lana had made of our first time. We dressed hurriedly and then she slung her bag over her shoulder before we climbed the stairs. She turned toward the kitchen, but I pulled her in the direction of the door. Lilly’s shoes were gone, so she was clearly next door.

We got ready to go and I led her over to my second home, opening the door to find everyone at the table already.

“We were trying to decide if we should wake you or let you skip the morning,” Patty teased when she heard the door open.

Lana gasped when she saw my face. “Oh my God!” she blurted out.

Patty turned and winced, but she’d seen Charlotte swinging wildly. She wasn’t surprised. “You feel okay, Champ?” she asked.

I shrugged. “Better than after surgery,” I said dryly and dropped into a chair easily. I actually felt sensational, but I wasn’t going to rub the girls’ faces in that.

Beck shot that duck though when she looked at me with elaborate casualness and commented that she didn’t remember that shirt being in my wardrobe.

I looked down and then looked at her innocently. “I don’t remember it either, but when I went looking for a shirt this morning, it presented itself like a lost puppy and I just couldn’t say no. After all, I AM a pornstar. ‘No’ isn’t in our vocabulary.” That made Dan choke on his coffee a little, but the rest of us laughed about it lightly. Beck and Lana gave me a look that said they still remembered the night we’d used the video cameras to record our first time. They smiled at me a little. It almost felt like old times.

We had a pleasant breakfast with some light teasing to try to downplay last night’s upset. Emma seemed to fit right in, comfortable with the banter, especially when it was at my expense. We got up to go and I kissed Emma goodbye softly. “Hey, I just remembered, how’s your roommate getting measured for her costume? She wasn’t with us the other day.”

“I had all her measurements,” she said lightly. “I know how to do a lot of that work from working with Daddy. I can’t exactly take my own measurements though. So I just read off the numbers to Char. I’m keeping the two of you separated for now. If you see her, you’ll guess her costume. You’ll have to wait for Saturday, but I promise, it’ll be worth the wait.” She gave me another kiss and then got in her car and took off for Harvard.

I rode in with Lana and Beck. I got in the back seat and they bombarded me with questions about Emma. They seemed remarkably different from the somber, subdued girls I’d seen yesterday and I told them I was glad that they were in better moods, even if it was at my expense.

Lana had parked in the student lot and turned to me. “I’m still really ashamed and last night was kind of scary, but I’m glad you and Emma are working. After everything that happened and finding out how bad you were suffering, not just at school, but when you tried to sleep, it’s good to see you happy. Without seeing you like that, I don’t think I could ever feel comfortable forgiving myself. Until I know you’re okay, I can’t be.”

Beck nodded. “Yeah. I couldn’t let it all go if you were still miserable.”

“Maybe that’s why Mom snapped. Putting us all back together was the only way she could think of to get us happy and when it didn’t work, she blew up,” I mused and shrugged. “Anyway, I have to go to the office to see Mr. Peterson. I’ll see you at lunch,” I promised.

We got out and I went to my locker quickly before running to the office so I’d have time to double back and find Tricia before class.

I got in to see Mr. Peterson and he looked at my face. “Sit down and tell me who did it, son,” he said, assuming I was there to report being beat-up.

“Actually sir, this happened off school grounds and it wasn’t done by a student here. I actually came to let you know my mother won’t be able to come to work for the next few days at least. She’s in the hospital. I’m sorry I wasn’t able to call you to let you know in the correct time-frame, but I don’t know the lock code for her phone and she wasn’t able to talk to me before she was taken in last night.”

He looked concerned. “Is it serious?” he asked gently.

I frowned. “We don’t know yet,” I admitted. “I’ll be talking to her doctor later today and tomorrow. Right now, they’re doing tests.”

He looked at me seriously. “Is there anything else you need to tell me?” he asked.

“On the record, no.”

“Off the record?”

“Depends on how FAR off the record,” I allowed. “It would have to be as far off the record as your fishing trip,” I said delicately.

He nodded in agreement immediately.

“Okay. I wouldn’t tell you this if I didn’t think I could trust you. Things aren’t particularly rosy at home. There was a nasty rumor about me earlier in the term and it wasn’t true, but everyone believed it. I lost my girlfriend and my best friend. Unfortunately, they both live next door and our families are so close that we’re practically one family, so it spilled over into all of our lives. When I finally found out the details, I managed to prove to everyone that I didn’t do what I was accused of.”

He stopped me at that point. “Is that the rumor relating to Miss Saunders?”

I blinked in surprise. “The faculty KNOW about that?” I asked, stunned.

He nodded. “Some of us. When a rumor goes around, it gets to our ears sooner or later,” he told me with a shrug.

I nodded sourly. “I was injured and under supervision when that was supposed to have happened. I can’t exactly sneak away to have an affair and then visit abortion clinics with a concussion and sprained ankle. No one put that together. The short answer without the sordid details is that it caused a lot of damage to our family. When the truth came out, the lie had had so much inertia that the feelings kept up. My mother didn’t handle it very well. She hadn’t treated me particularly fairly and when I resisted things going back to the way they were, we had a rather nasty blowup last night. I’d rather that my classmates not know I got beat-up by my mom and that she’s being treated for a breakdown of some kind. You can also understand that for the sake of her career, I wouldn’t want that on the record. Our family has suffered enough without her losing her job due to the stigma some people attach to mental health care. L. Ron Hubbard didn’t do the world any favors in that regard.”

He blew out his breath. “That’s terrible news!” he said. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

“You already have. I just want her to be able to come back to work when she’s well. I may be applying for legal emancipation in the coming weeks, so that will mean an update to my contact information. I’ll make an appointment to see you if and when I need to do that though.”

“It’s that serious? I mean, clearly it is. The bruising is grounds for criminal charges alone.”

I sighed. “There was one person who stood by me through all the rumors I asked her to marry me. My mother is fixated on cutting her out of my life and restoring my old dating conditions. She’s convinced that will make everything right. So yeah, it’s pretty serious.”

“Congratulations,” he said. “I take it the young lady said yes?”

I blinked then laughed. “You’re the first person who’s just accepted that news from me without telling me I’m too young or suspecting something sinister. Thanks. She did say yes.”

“With my lifestyle? I’m really in no condition to judge.”

“What you do is with consenting adults...” I pointed out. “I’m still fourteen though. The age difference makes people twitchy.”

“How old is she?” he asked lightly.

“She’s 18. She’s in a few of my classes at Harvard.”

“I thought you just watched the lectures from here?” he asked, confused at how I met someone.

“We met during the summer. I’m on campus every week too for neurological tests and I get notice whenever there’s going to be a test so I show up to write it. I do get to spend a little time with her.”

He nodded. “Well, it’s been noticed by the faculty at large that you don’t have much of a social life. I’m glad that’s not universally true. You should get off to class though. Come see me if you have any more news or if you need a sympathetic ear.” He smiled and shook my hand.

“Thanks, Mr. Peterson. I will.”

I found Tricia at her locker and her jaw dropped when she saw my face. “What happened!??!” she wanted to know.