Butlered!
Copyright© 2016 by Gordon Johnson
Chapter 13
Miss Frobisher, I thought. Now, THERE is a puzzle. If the records are accurate, she is still employed as a police constable, in an undercover capacity. Presumably, she is looking into the activities of Mr John Dawes. That gives me some inkling of a background to her attitude of being socially uncooperative. Historically, where undercover police got too involved with the people they were investigating, this undermined the validity of their work, so nowadays they are more circumspect.
I think I should be very careful in my dealings with Miss Frobisher. She may be here as an undercover cop, or may have left the service unofficially, or might even have defected to the criminal fraternity. Whatever the situation, I should keep my mitts off her until I know more.
As to the house transaction, again I must wait for more information, it would appear. I should simply continue my work as Jeeves until I have a better, more comprehensive understanding and deduce my best options.
Next morning, as I began my regular duties, I found myself looking at everything in a different way. I viewed the family members as before, but not Miss Frobisher. She, I saw with new eyes. I observed as she watched the family members go about their normal business at the breakfast table. Her attention now seemed more of an examination; as if she was looking at them for a clue of some kind.
Is there a special way that a police person looks at other people? I never seemed to think so, but by this point I was less certain. Perhaps police were trained and equipped to notice small changes in demeanour, in behaviour? I had no relatives who were in the police ranks, so I had no previous knowledge to fall back on. It remained a mystery to me.
“Jeeves? Are you with us?” My attention had wandered from my work. “I do beg your pardon, Miss Catherine. I was thinking about another task.”
“What I asked, Jeeves, was: ‘Have you completed compiling your inventory, seeing you have returned my tripod?”
“Indeed I have, Miss. I have added the photographs to the items listed, and as far as I can tell, the task is complete. I merely have to run through the inventory, one by one, to confirm that my assumption is fully accurate. I shall then inform your father that the inventories are prepared, so that he can make any decisions about alterations in insurance cover, or in security measures ... that sort of thing.”
“Inventories, Jeeves? Plural?” This girl was sharp.
I paused, thinking. “Indeed, Miss. It is sometimes simpler to keep a total inventory as several sections, for convenience of use by the Master.”
“Oh. I thought it might be something I didn’t know about?”
I expressed ignorance, saying, “Miss, I simply list everything according to the Master’s wishes. The total coverage is up to the Master. Some inventories may include expensive machines employed by the household, such as computers, small garden tractor, and so on. These are not normally regarded as valuables, but may be regarded as such for the purposes of inventory and insurance, if the Master so desires.”
“Oh. I see. Thank you, Jeeves.” Catherine seemed disappointed that no revelation transpired. I got the impression she had suspicions about her father, but didn’t want to speak them in public.
Dawes had been listening, and now intervened. “Thank you, Jeeves. That will be all.”
I bowed towards him, and departed for the kitchen, to check that chef was happy with today’s morning proceedings. She was, but appreciated my attention.
“You always say the right things, Jeeves. Thank you for your concern.”
“Chef, I merely act as I have been trained. It is unfortunate that more people do not apply similar consideration for others.”
“Whatever the reason, it is still appreciated, Jeeves.”
“Acknowledged, chef. I think I had better go and polish my shoes again. They are looking a little jaded. I must have scuffed them this morning.” I escaped her plaudits and retired to my pantry and my posted schedule, to see what I needed to do later today.
I found that I genuinely had not completed the confirmation of matching images to inventory items. I had confirmed the first twenty, and got bored. I really ought to do some more.
The boring bit was selecting which of several images was the best one for attaching to the inventory item. Often there were only minor differences between images of the same item: the angle of view or slight changes in lighting angle. I usually ended by selecting the one I personally liked, and left it at that. It was wonderful where, out of three images, only one was bereft of flaws such as reflections.
I was engrossed in this task when someone tapped at my partially opened door. “Jeeves? Are you free?” It was Miss Catherine.
I halted my work and turned to face her. “I am now, Miss Catherine. This task is boring, so your interruption is welcome. What can I do for you?”
“Daddy said something about bodyguard duties being a possibility. He was wanting to know when we might need to have a bodyguard on hand. It puzzled me.”
“I apologise for all the confusion, Miss Catherine. It was occasioned by a slight altercation I had in the street with some teenage boys. Your father thought I might add body guarding to my duties, but I am not keen on that suggestion as I am not qualified in body guarding work.”
“I see.” She clearly did not see this at all, so I went on. “It was due to my ability to protect myself, as a result of army training in self defence. Your father has taken it further, without any intention on my part. It is quite unsettling, I find.”
“Poor Jeeves. Daddy is so self-centred; he forgets that other people have feelings, and rides rough-shod over them. What worries you about it?”
“I am a butler miss. While my army training permits me to observe and be able to comment on security lapses, I really have no knowledge at all about the process of guarding civilians. It is a whole new field for me. Butlering is a proud career, but the training does not involve body guarding duties, and that policy is, I believe, the correct one.
Should some family member be injured or worse through a failure of mine through inexperience, I would be very distressed indeed.”
“So what do you want to do, Jeeves?”
“My feeling, miss, is that I should refer such a request to my employers, the firm of Jeeves and Company. They have the capacity to refuse to allow me to take on such duties, as it is outwith the contract; but on the other hand, they might offer to have me trained in body guarding work. I just do not know what will happen.”
Miss Catherine came closer and patted my shoulder reassuringly. “I think you are right, Jeeves. You should ask your company to intervene.”
“Thank you for your advice, Miss Catherine. Your opinion is most welcome.”
She paused to reflect.
“Jeeves? Now that I am here, can I ask you about Frobisher?”
“Frobisher, Miss? What do wish me to comment on?”
“It is the way she has been acting in the last couple of days. She seems to be a bit flustered when you are talked about. It is as if she does not know what to do or say about you. Have you been doing something to cause this, Jeeves?” She held up a hand. “I do not want to interfere where I am not wanted, Jeeves, if you have some feelings for her. It is an entirely altruistic enquiry, so that I know where I am with Frobisher. Up until now, she has been a very upright girl, almost straight-laced in her views and attitude to everyone around her. Your presence seems to have affected her, unsettled her balance in some way.”
“Miss Catherine, my presence in this household is under contract to Jeeves and Company. If there is any way in which Mr Dawes or other members of the family are upset with the performance of my duties, then I shall immediately retire from the scene, and the Company will provide an alternative Jeeves.”
Catherine wrinkled her nose and snorted, “Jeeves, you are as usual avoiding answering my question. I am NOT complaining about your performance, but enquiring about a relationship between you and Miss Frobisher.”
“But Miss Catherine, there is NO ‘relationship’ as you call it between myself and Miss Frobisher. We are fellow employees in this household, and while I hold her in high esteem, it would be improper of me to embark on any sort of ‘relationship’ here and now.”
“Ah, so you do have a high regard for her?”
“Indeed so, Miss Catherine. She is an attractive lady, and for some time I have been without any female companionship, so there is a temptation within me, but I must, for the moment, refrain from any such temptations. More so, now, as your enquiries have told me that I must be completely detached in my work here.”
“But Jeeves, this does not solve my problem. I must...” She was interrupted by my house phone sounding imperatively. I answered.
“Jeeves.”
Jones was at the other end. “Jeeves, the cops are at the gate! Just as well the new system is operational. Should I hold them there, or let them come to the door?”
“Mr. Jones, if the deputation is led by a sergeant, then allow them to come to the door, and I shall meet them.”
“It does seem to be a guy with sergeant’s stripes, Jeeves, so I will buzz them into the grounds. Get your butt over here soonish, ‘cause I don’t want to deal with them.” When Jones was uneasy, he tended to use Americanisms in his speech. I noted this tendency.
“I am on my way.” I responded, then spoke to Miss Catherine. “My apologies, miss, but I must get to the front door, to repel boarders, or at least to receive the police!”
Catherine laughed at the idea. “Sure, on your way, Jeeves. Can I come and watch?”
“I am unable to prevent you, Miss, but I would advise keeping well back, as a precaution in case Mr. Jones gets involved.”
“Spoilsport. Okay, I’ll watch from a distance.”
I was approaching the door when the doorbell rang. I opened it, and the same police sergeant stood there, expectantly. I waited for his opening remark. He spoke politely.
“Sergeant Blenkinsop for Mr Jeeves, if that is convenient.”
I nodded and opened the door wider. “Do please enter, Sergeant Blenkinsop.”
He remained still. “Thank you, sir. I have an update on the matter we discussed.”
“I see.” I looked beyond him, towards the car, where another policeman sat in the driving position, but watching us closely. “Are you free to join me for a coffee, sergeant?”
“I can do that, Mr. Jeeves if it is the same coffee. Just give me a moment.” He turned towards his driver and held up both hands, fingers splayed, indicating ten minutes. His driver gave him a ‘thumbs up’ signal of understanding, and the sergeant turned his attention back to me.
“Right, Mr. Jeeves. I take my coffee black, with two sugars.”
“Over to the reception office, then, sergeant.” He followed me, and when he spotted Miss Catherine, he gave her a short wave of acknowledgment. She smiled back at him. We entered the office, and I started to set up the coffee machine, and fetched out the sugar jar from its shelf. I did not use sugar, myself, but Jones had a sweet tooth. As the preparation would take a little time, the sergeant took off his chequered hat, laid it on a clear space on the small table, and began his story.
“After our little chat the other day, I visited the young man in the hospital. He is getting better every day, I am told. I came out right away with some basic facts. I told him that my investigations had revealed that he was not alone in his confrontation with you. He seemed a trifle put out that I already knew this, so I murmured, ‘Witnesses’, then told him, ‘I have spoken to the gentleman who hit you, Jimmy. He explained to me how he had tried to avoid any unpleasantness, but you decided to opt for violence with a knife.’
He became red in the face, but did not challenge my informed version of events. I went on, ‘Do I collect sworn statements from your friends, Jimmy? In which case I need their names and addresses. We can escort them to the police station to take their statements under oath, and at the same time we can check on any police or court record they may happen to have. This should assist in assessing the veracity of their statements.’ He looked blank at the word ‘veracity’, so I explained, ‘Whether they are telling the truth, Jimmy. Understand?’
This put him out even more, so I added, ‘I have obtained an assurance from the gentleman who resisted you, to the effect that he is willing to let the matter drop. It appears he does not wish his defensive capabilities to become common knowledge, lucky you.
How do you see things, Jimmy? I would of course recommend that in any case you do not confront him again, for your own good. I have it on good authority that he is dangerous in a fight.’”
The coffee was by now ready, so I poured the two coffees before he went on with his tale.
“After a little more discussion, Jimmy agreed to allow the matter to be forgotten, with no action on either side. Jimmy seems to have accepted that he acted precipitately, and his injury was his own fault.” He paused. “This is good coffee, Mr. Jeeves. Thank you.”
“It is the type used by the entire household, sergeant, so we are fortunate that way. I understand the brand is not easy to get hold of.
So, the lad and his friends will be no more bother?”
“That is what we assume, si ... Jeeves. With teenagers, you never know, but I think you put the wind up them. If you meet them again, please refrain from comment. I think that will be the best course.”
“Ah. Is that a discreet warning from you, sergeant?”
“Mr. Jeeves, regard it as my advice on how you should proceed in future. If there is another confrontation, it may end up in court, no matter what way it goes on the street. I expect you want to avoid that.”
“True. Very well, sergeant, consider your message delivered and understood. I shall do nothing to acerbate your teenager problems.”
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