Chapter 5

I just stared at her for a few seconds as tears formed in my eyes. I felt my lips move, but no words came out. I thought it would probably be better if I didn’t say anything - I’d likely end up even deeper in shit.

I loudly blew out a lung full of air, looked down and muttered, “Okay.” The keys were still in the ignition. After maybe another thirty seconds Hannah was in her driveway, headed towards the kitchen door without looking back.

Driving away, I pounded both hands on the steering wheel as I screamed, “Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!“

Ten silent minutes later I was nearing my neighborhood when a sharp pain struck my groin. The first twinge was like a kick to the balls, followed a moment later by a vice like grip that had me squirming in agony as I struggled to drive.

I’d been hit in the balls before, but the pain never lasted very long. Ten minutes on and I was in my room, wondering when it would let up.

The folks were in the TV room watching the tube. I slipped downstairs and got on the phone to Paul. “Hey, help me out here.”

“Yeah, what’s the matter? You sound terrible.”

“I feel like someone kicked me in the God damn nuts.”

“Wait, what?”

“Well, actually - that might be the least of my problems. Okay ... Hannah and I were making out...”

“Whoa, when did this start?”

“Last week at the movies, we kissed ‘n shit, even some tongue - she was really into it.”

“Orange jump suit, bud.”

“Yeah, whatever ... so tonight we were making out in the car, like I was working on her boobs and when I went...”

“Boobs! My little baby boy is growing up! You got to feel some boobies? You’re what? Thirty-seven now?”

“Look, I don’t need you being an asshole right now! Problem is she freaked out and got all pissy as soon as I touched her down there...”

“Okay, that’s not good.”

“ ... I had to take her home and then fifteen minutes later my balls start hurting so bad, and they still haven’t stopped. I’m dying, man.”

“What you have here is a classic case of the blue balls. Tell me - you’ve never got this far with a chick yet, right?”

“I’m more worried that now she’ll never want to talk me again.”

“You’re asking relationship questions of the other guy with no girlfriend?”

“I dunno, maybe your gay? Do any of my friends have girls?”

“Please, let me be serious.”

“Yes, please.“

“You already pushed too hard - just back off and give her some space to sort things out.”

“What if she hates me? How long do I have to wait?”

“Risk you take, but I’d give a day or two - then say everything was your fault.”

“Wait it out - great. Any ideas about the balls?”

“See, when she shut you down, all that sperm that was expecting to shoot all up inside of her got bottled up in your balls with no escape. You’re just going to have to rub it out and take a hot bath, dude.”

“As long as it stops, this is killing me.”

The next morning, physically I was fine again but mentally I was a mess - scared shitless that at any moment that thread would be cut and the sword would lop off my head.

I made some oatmeal for breakfast but picked at it and barely ate any.

I tried to read the sports but didn’t give a shit.

I went out to walk in the woods, but instead of skipping stones on the pond I was firing them into it.

I got home before lunch, went to the living room and put a record on the stereo. The Moody Blues’ “Day of Future Passed.” Headphones clamped on, the volume up, I laid on the floor and closed my eyes.

I dozed off, but after twenty minutes I heard the needle scratching and had to flip over the record.

I was zoned out by the time the last song started.

Lacking energy to do anything else, I put that record back in it’s sleeve and pulled out Boston.

When I’m tired and thinking cold
I hide in my music, forget the day
And dream of a girl I used to know
I closed my eyes and she slipped away

She slipped away-ay-aaaay

‘Damn it!’

No fucking way I was giving up yet. I wiped my tears and stomped into the kitchen, grabbed the phone and dialed my aunt’s house.

“Hannah?”

“Yeah?”

“This is Joe.”

“I know.”

“I ... I wanted to check ... and see if you’re okay.”

“I’m fine.”

“No, really. I mean ... I don’t want you to hate me. I’m sorry.”

“I don’t hate you. I’m fine.”

“Are you coming to the game tonight?”

“I don’t know. Depends on how I feel.”

“But you said...”

“I’m fine. I gotta go now, I’ll see you later. Bye.”

Click.

‘Well, she said she didn’t hate you.’

It was the second inning when Randy finally asked, “Joe, where’s the wifey tonight?”

Still staring straight ahead at the opposing pitcher, I frowned and answered, “Not sure, I don’t think she came tonight.”

“Whoa, trouble in paradise?”

“Eh, we had a little... incident last night. I’m waiting for her to get over it.”

“Well, if you guys ever go Splitsville - mind giving me her number?”

I turned my head quickly, his face within an arm’s length of mine, and spit out, “Hey, fuck you.”

Bruce jumped up and scampered in front of us. “Guys - chill! We don’t need no fighting.”

I mumbled, “Whatever” as I got up and headed for the dugout.

After the game Aunt Janet, Dave and Donna were waiting in the stands. I asked my aunt, “Where’s Hannah?”

“Said she had a headache. Spent most of the afternoon in bed.”

Once home I went straight to my room and put the Pirates’ game on the radio. They beat the Padres seven-to-one and went three and a half games up on the Expos. As soon as the game was over I shut off my light and buried myself under the blankets.

At least my interest in food was returning on Wednesday. For lunch I fried up some chipped ham, topped with a slice of American cheese, a slice of tomato, a squirt of mustard and a lump of cole slaw.

I was nearly finished when the phone rang. I reached up from the table and answered, “Hello?”

“Joe, I got some great news!”

“Yeah - who’s...”

“Hannah, dummy.”

“I thought so.”

“I made team!”

“Oh, the...”

“Yeah, the cross country team! I went out this morning and did the three miles in seventeen minutes and change! Kicked ass - excuse my language!”

“That’s so great! I’m proud of you.”

“I’m the only girl and the only ninth-grader. I get to travel and dress, and then the coach will decide before each meet whether he’ll have me run.”

“I bet your legs look better than anyone else’s when all a’yunz have those little shorts on.”

“Joe, I hope you’re not looking at the guys’ legs.”

“Of course not. And, um ... are we good?”

“We’re getting better.”

“I missed you.”

“I missed you too. Sorry for being so bitchy.”

“No - you weren’t...”

“Joe, don’t argue with a woman when she’s forgiving you.”

“Yes dear. You comin’ to the game tonight?”

“Yeah, as far as I know mom’s bringing us all down again.”

“Can’t wait. Hey - before you go, is Dave there?”

“I think he’s down in the kitchen. I’ll yell at him to pick up the phone.” She screamed, “Daaaave, Joe’s on the phone for you!”

I heard the phone being jostled and then my cousin said, “Hey man, what’s up?”

I waited a split second until I heard the click of Hannah’s extension hanging up, and started in with, “Seriously dude, twelve?”

“What?”

“Ellen.”

“Uhhh...”

“Jones - from the party last week. Forget already?”

“Oh, wow - where did you hear that?”

“From her, she told me after the game on Monday.”

“No way!”

“Yeah way, and my cock’s bigger.”

“Whoa – how the...”

“I showed it to her.”

“Wait a minute, wasn’t Hannah with you that night?”

‘Fuck - busted!’

I heard Aunt Janet ask, “Honey, where was Hannah?”

Dave turned away from the phone and said, “Nothing Mom, Joe and Hannah saw something on the way home Monday.”

After a couple seconds of silence I responded, “Yeah, and she liked it too!”

“DUDE!”

We lost the third game of the finals on Wednesday and were on the verge of elimination. Hannah did attend along with the rest of her family, but was subdued in our post-game conversations.

We tied the series on Thursday, then won the league championship with a resounding seven-one victory on Friday. As soon as the ball was squeezed for the final out, all of our players ran from their positions on the field, in the bullpen and on the bench to gather in a screaming mob in the middle of the infield. Nearly all had given up their dreams of professional baseball, but in three days we’d be playing in the tournament we’d grown up watching.

Monday would be Opening Night for us at the stadium. Registration, the banquet and the dance would come on Sunday, and as for Saturday ... as soon as the thrill of the moment began to wane our left fielder Rich Hall yelled out, “Hey guys! Listen up. Party at my house tomorrow night. Lots of food and, uh ... we’ll have some drinks for everyone. I want to see all a’yunz there, and bring a friend!” followed by one last group scream before we headed out to meet our friends and families.

Hannah was back to her bubbly self, bouncing up and down and hugging me as I joined them in the stands. Once she let go, I turned to my aunt. “We’re, um ... having a team party tomorrow. Is it okay with you if I take Dave and Hannah?”

Hannah grabbed my arm and pleaded, “Please, Mom?”

“Is there going to be alcohol?”

“Yeah, probably some beer.”

She squinted her eyes. “I appreciate your honesty. You know my rules.”

“Yes, m’am, I do ... and thank you.”

Hannah jumped in delight then continued to hang on my arm as we walked to the lot. Dave asked, “What time tomorrow?”

“Starts at seven. I can be out at your house a little after six.”

He replied, “Sounds good, bro” as his sister gave my arm another squeeze.

I pulled into the alley behind the Hall’s house and parked in the grass by their garage, next to several other cars. As we walked towards the brightly lit back porch, I said to Hannah, “If anyone asks, just tell them you’re sixteen.”

We found the family room in the finished basement about half full as we entered, with a mix tape playing at a reasonable volume. We were quickly greeted by the host. “Joe, glad to see you!”

“Hey Richie, how ya doing? This is Dave Carter from Coke and his sister Hannah.”

They each shook his hand as he said, “Yeah, hi, pleased to meet you - I’ve seen you guys around at the games. Make yourself comfortable - there’s lots of food and drinks.”

Dave disappeared into the growing crowd, but Hannah followed me as I headed for the tap, next to the table with the stack of plastic cups. I handed her an empty one, and as I leaned over to work the handle that would fill mine with golden brew she asked, “But you promised Mom - no alcohol.”

“Don’t get drunk and she’ll never know. Here, give me your cup.”

Her face puckered after her first sip. “What kind of beer is this?”

“I dunno. The kind of beer that comes out of an unmarked silver keg?”

“Eh, not too bad - I can get used to it.”

I saw Randy headed our way and felt a residue of unease from our exchange earlier in the week.

“Hi Hannah, nice seeing you again. Joe’s told us a lot about you.”

She gave me a questioning look to which I shrugged my shoulders and said, “Just that you’re the most smokin’ hot, wicked smart, charming girl I’ve ever known.”

Randy chuckled. “Yeah, something like that.”

Hannah slipped her arm around mine and replied, “I fall for the smart ones. Tells me he has potential.”

As Randy headed off I scanned the room, conducting a mental roll call. I spotted Lori, who had a reputation for being fairly easy, but who hadn’t given me the time of day when I had tried to introduce myself at the last party. And there was...

“So you got the most smokin’ hot girl hanging on your arm, and you’re checking out other women?”

‘How did she... ‘

As calmly as possible, I commented, “I see Vickie’s gotten back with Bill Mock.”

“Who’s that?” she asked.

I nodded towards the right corner of the room. “Over there, the brunette with the tall blonde guy.”

“So you know her?”

“Just from games and parties. Well ... I did ask her out back in June.”

“Oh yeah, what happened?”

“She gave me her number, I called twice, and she was nice to me but both times said she was busy, try again later. So I dropped it.”

“Sounds like you made the wise choice.”

“You’ll probably see her at school, she goes to Pineland too. I think she’s gonna be a junior.”

Hannah tilted her head back and drained the last of her cup down her throat. Handing it to me she asked, “Can you get me another one?”

“Uh ... yeah, sure. But let’s not overdo it.”

As she followed me back to the keg, she said, “I’m fine.”

“I’ve heard that before.”

She took a sip from the full cup I handed back to her. “I’m just buzzed a little.”

“That’s what they all say. You know how pissed you mom’s going to be if I bring you home buzzed.”

She looked up at me with big eyes. “Kiss me.”

“What?”

“I said, kiss me!”

I leaned down and gave her a brief smack on the lips. “You taste like beer.”

As we turned away, my hand in my middle of her back, she said, “I just want everyone to know you’re mine.”

A few minutes later Dave came wandering over and I asked, “Where’ve you been?”

“Met this chick Lori - she just blew me in the bathroom.”

“Shit Dave, I can’t take you anywhere.”

“And I leave you alone with my sister, and you get her drunk?“

“I am not drunk.”

“And I am not a stud. Whatever, catch you guys later.”

As Dave headed back off into the crowd I asked Hannah, “You want me to get you a sandwich and some chips? Soak up some of the booze?”

She sat on the arm of a chair. “Sure, I’ll be here.”

I was met at the food table by Vickie’s boyfriend Bill who made some plates of his own. “Hey Joe, did I see you with a girl tonight?”

I was making her a sandwich with turkey, american and mayo. “Yeah, Hannah Constantino.”

“How long have you been seeing her?”

I made the same for myself, but piled ham and roast beef on top of my turkey as well. “About a month. They just moved here and she’ll be going to Pineland.”

“Well, good job!”

I finished each plate off with a handful of Snyder’s. “Thanks, man.” Realizing I had two plates and a cup to carry, I chugged down what was left of my beer then headed back towards Hannah, Bill right behind me.

Upon arriving I found Vickie standing next to Hannah, both of them giggling and glancing my way. The other girl leaned in and whispered in Hannah’s ear, causing her to laugh uncontrollably.

“Hi Vickie, how are you?”

“Great Joe. I just met Hannah, and she’s been telling me all about you.”

Bill handed Vickie her plate as I responded, “I’m not sure if that’s good or bad.”

She grinned. “I’ll never tell.”

Bill said, “He’s a good guy, Hannah” and I smiled in appreciation.

At that moment the mix tape got to the chorus of The Knack song, and we and everyone else in the room raised their right hands and shouted...

“My Sharona!”

After that, Bill continued, “C’mon Vickie, I see Todd over there.”

I gave a small wave and said, “Later” and Vickie smiled back.

I sat on the chair, and Hannah, still sitting on the arm said, “You know, she really was busy.”

“What? You asked?“

“I wanted to see if there was anything wrong with you. Maybe not. Her loss.”

Without a word, I looked up and smiled as I felt my cheeks blush.

We both spent the next few minutes making quick work of our food, her’s washed down with beer. When Rod Stewart was playing, I gazed back up at her, singing along...

Hannah pushed her sandwich onto her plate and laughed quite loudly until she snorted!

“I didn’t think it was that funny!”

Trying to regain her composure, she put her hand on my shoulder and said, “Oh God, you kill me.”

“No more beer for you!”

“Huh - well let me finish my food then.”

While we were both at the garbage can, Billy Joel came on. I tugged at Hannah’s arm. “C’mon.”

She stumbled behind me as everyone gathered in a circle, arms around the person on either side of them. People were coming in from outside. As the song continued, we all swayed back and forth, singing along as loudly as we could.

And on and on through the other verses, as we had long before memorized the song. As I sang I felt an intense tickle on my butt. I turned my face to see Hannah grinning up at me.

For the rest of the song, her finger tips were tracing paths up and down the back of my thigh. Despite my blood alcohol level, my groin was noticing.

When the song ended, Hannah puckered her lips and gazed up. I gave her what I intended to be a normal kiss, but felt her tongue pushing against my lips. I pointed to the door and whispered, “Outside.”

She took the lead, our hands joined as she dragged me behind her. Out in the driveway, we found a dark spot alongside the garage. As I wrapped my arms around her waist, she looked up and whispered “Do ya think I’m sexy?”

I answered by returning my lips to hers, pressing hard as Hannah fell into the wall of the garage. That time I welcomed her tongue and as my arousal grew my hands began roaming, first up and down her back, then over the fabric of her shorts and back up to squeeze her breasts. As she grabbed my butt and pulled me closer, her lack of height caused me to press into her belly.

When I finally backed off for some air, suddenly I felt her hand squeezing me through my slacks. I glanced back over my shoulder at a small group of people on the back porch, not thirty feet away. I whispered, “Let’s go to the car - we don’t need to be putting on a show for everyone.”

We both settled in our respective front seats of the Pinto, turned towards each other and locked lips over the hand brake. Soon Hannah reached over to resume stroking my hardness. Then she fumbled with the zipper.

Frustrated, she complained, “C’mon! I want to see it again!”

‘Oh my God’

My heart was pounding.

Again she failed to lower the zipper. “You do it. I don’t have time to play around.”

I leaned back to lift up off the seat. I undid my belt buckle, opened up Kennywood and slid my pants down below my butt. Next thing I knew Hannah’s small hand was inside the fly of my boxers, wrapped around my manhood.

I was stroking the inside of her thigh, then began moaning softly as she pulled it out of my underwear, gently sliding her hand up and down along it’s length.

My hand worked it’s way further up her thigh, but I suddenly I had second thoughts. “Are you going to smack me if I touch you?”

“You’re going to get smacked if you don’t touch me!”

She unsnapped her shorts and leaned back, then reached for me with her left hand.

My breathing became quick and shallow as she resumed her work on me. I laid my palm on her belly and slipped my fingers inside her panties. I inched lower until I felt her wiry pubic hairs. I paused briefly to explore the extent of her patch then continued lower.

She gasped and her hand tightened it’s grip on me as my fingers found her wet, warm lips.

Hannah began continually squirming and moaning as I pushed in and slipped a finger, then two, inside of her, seeing how deep I could penetrate. Suddenly she tensed, her thighs locking my hand in place. She let out a scream, “AAAAHH“ and then “YES!“ as her body spasmed in orgasm. Still unable to remove my hand, I continued to lightly rub her until she collapsed.

She still had a firm grasp on my tool and I was close. She smiled at me, and after inspecting it for a second dropped her mouth over it. I felt her tongue on one side and then the other as my tip scraped against the top of her mouth. Hannah continued to bob and suck as I began squeezing her thigh. “I’m cumming, I’m CUMMING!“ She made no effort to move and I shot inside her mouth, causing her to cough and choke at first, but she did her best to swallow it all.

When I had no more, she pulled off and rolled over to her side of the car, leaning back into the seat. I took her hand as we both sat silently for a few minutes.

Eventually she reached down to fix her pants and said “Can we go for a walk? I don’t want to go home yet.”

It was a cool night as we strolled hand in hand down the neighborhood street. “Hannah, I...” but she put her finger to her lips to silence me.

After a couple blocks she pointed to a lawn, sloping gently towards the street. She led me into the grass where I sat beside her.

“Just listen” she started. “That was the first time I’ve ever done that. Well - I’ve touched one before, but never put it in my mouth. And the first time I had anyone else give me a climax.”

Again I started to say something, but she said “Shush!” then continued. “I’m sorry for the other day, but you scared me. One of the reasons I really like you is you haven’t tried to take advantage of me. I could see how you were looking at me, but I thought it was kind’a cute how little me could intimidate you. But then you got all grabby and I was afraid I was losing control.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Wait, I’m not done.” She took my hand. “See, I love my mom – but I don’t want to be my mom. How many times has she been married? Knocked up in high school and she hasn’t kept a guy for more than a few years. I don’t want my life to be like that.”

I felt a tear. “What can I do?”

She looked me straight in the eyes. “Just shut up, kiss me, and hold me.”

It was a prolonged, tender kiss between those who loved each other. No tongue. We laid on the grass, my right arm around her as she rested her head on my shoulder. I felt her warmth and her heartbeat as I counted the stars in the clear sky.

After ten or fifteen minutes she whispered, “We can go now, I’m starting to get cold.”

We walked hand in hand back to the car. Neither of us said a word until, looking at the cinders she was kicking along the side of the street, Hannah said meekly, “I bet I wasn’t the best at doing it.”

She glanced up to measure my response and I grinned. “Best I ever had.”

She shoved her elbow in my side. “And you’re gonna tell me it’s the only one you ever had.”

“No - there was once before, but it wasn’t that good. She didn’t ... I mean, I never, uh, finished...”

“Don’t be embarrassed, you can say the word ‘cum’ in front of me.”

“Okay, I didn’t cum.”

She gave my hand a squeeze. “Well then - I did good!“

We’d been told to arrive at the hotel no later than ten a.m. on Sunday for registration. I was a few minutes early and watched my teammates filter in. Detroit was in the conference room when I arrived - Baltimore, Brooklyn and Cincinnati having already finished. Some of their players were mingling around the hotel and parking lot as those from other teams came in carrying their luggage. I peaked in the room and saw the line approaching the desk, each player stating their name and presenting their birth certificate.

I returned to the lobby, plopped down on the sofa and glanced up at the clock. I brushed my hand my shirt pocket to reassure myself that I hadn’t forgotten my own proof of age.

Randy spotted me as he came through the door and made a beeline to the couch, holding out his fist. “Dude!”

Lazily I reached up and bumped his fist. “What’s up?”

“Sounded like you had a great time last night!”

I suddenly felt warm. “Uh, yeah - it was a good party.”

“Don’t be shy, man - we heard your girl all the way back at the house.”

I quickly stood, closing the distance between us. Lowering my voice, I said firmly, “Please - don’t be making a scene. The last thing I need is for her to get all pissed off.”

“It’s cool, man. Just thought you might be celebrating. We were high-fiving on the back porch.”

“Oh God - a little privacy, that’s all I’m asking.”

“Yeah, well - you, me and sixteen other guys.”

“Fuck.”

For the next twenty minutes, every time one of those other guys said, “Hey Joe” I was wondering what they were really thinking.

Five hours later all sixteen teams gathered at the country club for the banquet.

“Long, where’s your tie?”

I looked up to see my coach scowling back. “Haven’t worn it since I had my senior picture taken in eleventh grade. Hate the feel of being strangled.”

“You have one tie?”

“Yeah, somewhere.”

“Well, at least you wore a suit coat. Try not to spill your dinner on it.”

“Yes, sir.”

It looked like each team got three tables. As the host, we got to sit front and center, and I picked a seat facing the podium.

I squirmed when Rich gave me a thumbs up, then he took the seat next to me. “Have a good time last night?”

“Yeah, thanks - good party.”

“No problem!”

The tournaments officials took their turns droning on and thanking everyone. Rich leaned over and whispered, “Yada, yada, yada ... where’s the food?”

I was dozing when they got around to introducing the featured speaker, Hall of Fame pitcher Bob Feller, who spun his tale of going from the cornfields to the major leagues.

I leaned over to Rich. “Hear that? Tied the American League record of seventeen K’s in a game. He hadn’t even started his senior year of high school - and look at us!”

“No shit?”

“Shit.”

After a few more minutes of listening to Feller, Rich asked, “How many here do you think will make the majors?”

I did the mental math, counting two hundred eighty eight players, but knew the answer from keeping track of the guys who had come to town over the previous ten years. “Four or five, give or take a couple.”

Soon after that the waiters started carrying out the covered plates of chicken cordon bleu, green beans and mashed potatoes. Several trays were stacked within my reach. Finishing my meal quickly and not seeing any waiters nearby, I quickly grabbed a second serving and dropped it on top of my dirty plate.

Rich said, “Damn dude, I don’t know how you still weigh a hundred and forty.”

After dinner I made a quick trip home for my third clothing change of the day, casual slacks and a golf shirt for the evening dance.

The line outside Diamond’s night club stretched down the block. I staked out a spot near the door, hanging with some guys I knew while scanning the crowd for Dave and Hannah.

Ten minutes later I saw my aunt’s car stopping at the far side of the street. I waved and jogged over to meet my cousins. Hannah had on a light blue skirt and was showing a lot of leg. I couldn’t complain.

Dave said, “See you later, man” as he wandered into the crowd.

As we waited for the doors to open, Hannah asked, “How was your day?”

“Registration this morning, a fairly boring banquet - but I did steal an extra dinner!”

Bill walked by, flashing a thumbs up, and I nodded in reply.

“You what?”

“They didn’t give you a lot, and the stack of hot plates was sitting right next to me...”

“And no one said anything?”

“My coach yelled at me for not wearing tie!”

Keith came up to us, quickly checked out Hannah from head to toe, then slapped me on the back. “Way to go man!”