Chapter 4

Soon, he turned into the compound, being immediately recognised by the gate guard. He parked the car, and took himself to the front door, where he was swiftly admitted. The man notified him, “The President wanted to see you, sir, as soon as you got back.”

Jeeves nodded in acknowledgement. “Thank you. I shall attend to it at once.”

He found the President in his study, watching a news channel. “Sir, you wished to see me?”

“Ah, Jeeves. You are back. So, yes. Can you shed any light on that story?”

“Which story would that be, sir?”

“The one about the robbers being killed on the Akan Highway. Was that you?”

“Sir, I made sure that I was not identified, so there is no link back to you. I told the other drivers that I was employed by the government. The radio has implied that I was an army officer in plain clothes, and I am happy to leave it at that. I had no wish to embarrass you, sir. I just did not want to be robbed.”

“EMBARRASS me? Jeeves, I would be quite happy to have the world know that my staff are competent in any situation.”

“That may be so, Your Excellency, but in the immediate circumstances I was not to know that, so I took appropriate action, based on my past training. It all happened like an old training exercise. It quite surprised me, being able to react in that way. I believed I had left all that behind. It seems that some aspects of the past never leave you, no matter how hard one tries.”

“Why, Jeeves, I do believe it is you who is embarrassed! You hate to admit that your past has caught up with you. Never mind. If you wish to hide yourself away in your Presidential employment, that is fine by me. I am flattered that you have shown how competent you are, as a man. It increases my confidence in my butler. I now know for sure that you will be able to defend me if necessary.”

“Thank you, sir. Your Excellency is most kind.”

“Obsequity as well! You are a true Jeeves, my man. I am so pleased that I found you. Go and get yourself showered and changed, Jeeves, before you report on your mission.” He looked at the time, and added, “Tiffin time, I think, Jeeves. Have the maid bring in tea and toast, Jeeves.”

“Certainly, sir.”

Jeeves retired, first to arrange for the tea, etc., then a quick shower and change. He was back in twenty minutes, looking impeccable. The President poured himself a cup of tea from the silver teapot. “Jeeves, as you have to report in confidence, man to man, pour yourself a cup of tea as well, but make sure we will not be disturbed.” Jeeves went off and issued the President’s orders. Once he had done so, he settled to report.

“Sir, I returned your lady to her parents’ home, as instructed, after the medical arrangements. The parents, unfortunately, found themselves financially unable to care for the girl any more, and left her disposition in my hands. Knowing your wishes, I found another family willing to take her in, and so we shall hear no more of her. I assured them that you would acknowledge their assistance at some future date. I left that date indefinite, thus Your Excellency has no direct obligation.”

“Initiative. That’s what I like about you, Jeeves. You carry out my wishes, even if you have to extemporise. Do go on.”

“Sir, I also did my best to get in contact with my former military colleagues. The contact details had altered over time, but I eventually got through to someone – I do not know who – and conveyed your hoped-for assistance in your recovery efforts. On my way back here, before the contretemps you alluded to earlier, sir, I was phoned. How they managed to maintain the signal, I do not know, but the gist of it got through to me.

In the course of exploring the signals traffic that banks employ, my colleagues were surprised at the high degree of sophistication involved in your apparent transactions.”

“So these guys were hackers, of a sort?” “You might say that, sir. Their investigation seems to have triggered some electronic security trigger, for they were contacted directly by the perpetrators.”

“Good grief, man. That is surprising! Are they offering anything?”

“Perhaps I should explain further, sir. The perpetrators were in fact, alien beings.”

“You are joking, surely?”

“No, sir. It was The Personalia, the intelligent spaceships that offer Earth’s link to the Colonies. I understand that the aliens also offer audit services to the business community. Accordingly, they have no need of resources such as your bank accounts, for themselves. It seems that they felt that as you and others had, shall we say, “redistributed” financial assets, they considered it equitable that they should do similarly, with the aim of providing help to the poor and needy. The word is that they will not give you anything back, as they regard it all as proceeds of crime.”

“Weird. Aliens rob me because they have ethical standards of their own? They actually see themselves as Robin Hood substitutes, do they?”

“It would appear so, sir. It was certainly a surprise to me. From what I had heard, their interests were more in the line of normal business activities. My sources say they own many patents that make money for them, so they are able to buy anything they need from Earth. Their other concern seems to be for Earth’s colonies. They have bought into some industries on Rehome, for example.”

“Jeeves, you are straying somewhat. I want to know, are my diamonds safe from them?”

“Oh, indeed, sir. Their efforts are entirely electronic. They have no physical presence on Earth, so they cannot touch assets held in physical form, such as gems and metals, artworks, or financial instruments on per. Any such assets are unaffected by them. That is what I understand.”

“Thank goodness for that, Jeeves. I am still upset about their depredations on my bank accounts, but at least my other assets are safe from them.”

“That is true, sir. You need have no fears on that account. Does that mean that Sir will be able to continue my salary?” He coughed politely, adding, “My apologies for being somewhat mercenary, sir.”

“Don’t concern yourself about that, Jeeves. I shall ensure that your salary is paid on time, for the foreseeable future.”

Jeeves was visibly relieved. “Thank you, sir. That puts my mind at rest. What can I do for you now, sir?”

“Have you got a valid passport, Jeeves? In your real name, of course!”

“Yes, sir. Are you contemplating a trip abroad, sir?”

“Yes, to collect some diamonds. I want you with me, for protection on the return trip.”

“Very well, sir. Carrying weapons across borders is not permitted, so I shall have to improvise, or else leave my weapons in a stash for collection after returning across the border.”

“I can probably manage it, if I designate you as my armed bodyguard. You would have to carry your weapon in that case. My position would allow that to happen. Obtain a firearm for that purpose, Jeeves.”

“Yes, sir. I shall make enquiries. May I have a day off, tomorrow, to go shopping?”

“Yes. Oh, I see. “Shopping”. Yes, of course.” He grinned in delight at the thought. “Shopping for a gun. I like it.” His smile vanished, and he remarked mildly, “One which is untraceable would be preferable, in case you have to use it unofficially, and make it vanish.” Jeeves merely nodded his understanding.

Next morning, Jeeves loaded up his Land Rover for a trip, and set off. Five kilometres down the road, he drew to a stop and made a call. He explained his need for an untraceable hand gun, for officially protecting the President. He was given a address to go to. He entered it into his satnav, and set off again. He was there in around ninety minutes. It was an ironmongery shop in a small town. He drew into a parking area a block away, and walked to the shop. He sauntered in like any normal customer, after admiring the contents of the front display.

He was faced with a young male assistant. He told the young man, “My name is Mr Lines. I was looking for a special order, which was phoned in earlier.” The young man looked puzzled, but slipped through a bead curtain to the back shop. He was back quickly, followed by an older man, who looked Jeeves up and down.