Chapter 6

"What the fuck is going on?"

"All we can say is your ol' man said to tell you that Ted said he wanted you to have a party and he wants to make sure he'll never forget it." Says Becky. Other than that, once your guests arrive you're to go upstairs and change.

"Other than that we know Nuffinkk." Pam says, emphasizing the last word. "Now spill it where didcha meet 'im?"

They start to quiz Olivia about her and her relationship with David, till they are disturbed by the doorbell.

Olivia answers the door, finding Ted, Stella Claire and a man she supposes to be Kevin, she thinks Ted looks like the wolf from Roger rabbit as he undresses her with his eyes and Kevin has a look of Droopy about him.

"I thought you would have made more of an effort, that hardly looks sexy." Ted complains, still managing to leer.

"Uh, I haven't had time to change yet, why don't you all go through, you'll find drinks in the garden.

As she speaks music filters through from the garden. The Blues brothers version of the theme from Rawhide.

"Ah Davy boy getting into the spirit of things I see." Says Ted a lecherous smile of satisfaction spreads over his face.

"Go sort yourself out with drinks uh, I'll go change."

The look of lust Ted gave her made her want to retch.

"The four people wandered through the house, surprised to find two women there, dancing with each other.

"Who are they?" Claire hisses.

"I don't know." smiles Ted, but I can't wait to find out, get me a drink Kevin."

Kevin slopes off to follow his orders, as he passed the girls Pam grabs hold of him and makes him dance with her and Alice.

"Sort you fucking husband out will you." Ted tells Claire before sauntering up to the girls. The music changes.

That smell, by Lynyrd Skynyrd, followed by Chirpy chirpy cheep cheep. The girls let Kevin go and ignoring Ted walk off and into the house. They give sarcastic smiles to Claire and Stella as they pass. Alice returns just after Rammsteins Mann gagan Mann blasts out of the speakers.

Noting that Kevin doesn't have a drink in his hand she fetches him a lager and starts to talk to him, he keeps looking nervously at Ted. Pam joins them a little while after, showing Andy and Andi in, she points out the beer to them and joins Kevin and Alice.

Ted is glad to have another man there and he starts to talk with Andy.

A short while later Richie, Staci and Olivia come into the marquee.

Ted drools as he sees Olivia, She is wearing skin tight black jeans covered in thigh length boots, a black skin tight vest and a black leather jacket. She greets the Andies and gets herself a bottle. AC DC's back in black comes over the sound system.

Ted is getting annoyed, he has been watching Kevin dancing with those two women and now he seems to be relaxing. Olivia is ignoring him and is soon also dancing with Kevin and although his regular fuck buddies are with him he can't stop watching Kevin dancing with the three hottest women here. He also realises that although there are only a few people here and only two he doesn't know that if he causes a scene he will just make himself look stupid.

The music gets louder, Ted is puzzled, he can see the speakers but he can't see the sound system or work out who has just turned it up. Now the mamas and Papas, California dreaming blasts out followed by Ricky Nelsons, Travelling man.

A silhouette of a man appears in the darkened kitchen doorway, he walks over to Olivia and mimicking the scene from the blues brothers where Jake holds a case open that contains Elwood's harmonica, or blues harp as it is referred to. He opens the case. Olivia looks at the man, the jeans, the boots and the leather jacket, then she looks at the contents of the case he is holding. He says something to her and she takes the contents out. He throws the case to the side and turns his back to her.

The man holds his arms out and with actions reminiscent of Lee Marvin having his waistcoat put on him by the Indian in the film Cat Ballou. Olivia dramatically pulls a leather cut off over his leather. Ignoring everyone, he turns to his wife and dances with her as another mamas and papas hit fills the air. Dedicated to the one I love. As it fades the music changes, less volume, Thin Lizzy, the boys are back in town.

David looks at her and smiles. I told you to trust me didn't I. Once we've got rid of dickhead, there are some people I really want you to meet. You owe them all a big thankyou.

Ted is worried, he realises that the David Hunt with the arrest record, the one he dismissed in his research is the one here now. He knows he has made a mistake and totally underestimated his opponent. He stops watching the couple and begins to sidle toward the kitchen door.

He turns and bolts, almost immediately runs into a wall of flesh. Two men stand in front of him, one stands well over six feet tall and is heavily built, the other shorter and wider, a lot wider.

"Don't try anything, I'm a policeman."

The two men are grinning, they do not move, for a while. Ted is also motionless, then as if by some pre arranged signal they step aside allowing him to move forwards, he sees many others behind them, they too move aside lining the way to the back door with an avenue of leather.

Terrified he runs through them into another body. This one does not move, in the dark kitchen he cannot see who it is. Hello darkness my old friend fills his ears, then the volume is lowered again. Two people firmly grab his arms, he struggles.

"You won't get away with this, I'm a copper, I will have you all for this."

"Were a copper." A voice says.

Ted hopes that voice does not belong to who it sounds like. Someone turns on the lights.

As he blinks trying to acclimatise his eyes to the brightness, another voice comes from behind him.

"When you get out look me up, then you can tell me who has it worse in prison, sex offenders or bent coppers. Oh, you won't know unless you ask each time you get the shit kicked out of you, seeings how you're both."

"You want the pleasure of cuffing this turd Pooch?" Says the man in front of Ted.

"Damn right I do." David says as he takes the offered handcuffs from Deputy Chief Inspector Kemp. He clamps the cuffs on Ted's wrists. "You wanted to be fucked, well you are now, well and truly fucked."

Dave pushes Ted toward Kemp.

"Pooch." A voice calls from outside.

"Pooch" from many voices Pooch, Pooch Pooch. It becomes a chant.

"Pooch Pooch Pooch, Pooch Pooch Pooch, Pooch Pooch Pooch, Pooch pooch Pooch." The chant continues 'til Dave holds up his arms, as he walks back out into the marquee he embraces each of the men and women in turn. Nigger apologises for not recognising him, David thanks him for the drinks.

As he gets outside Peters and Lee sing out Welcome home over the PA.

"For fucks sake someone shoot the fucking DJ." David calls out. "And you bastards, rule number four."

"Don't wanna see nobody not drinkin'" everyone apart from Olivia and Ted's guests recite in reply.