Mayhem in a Pill
Copyright© 2015 by Shinerdrinker
Chapter 65: Party All the Time
“Damn, man,” Frank Robinson fumed as he slammed his right hand and forearm on the roof of the Ford Explorer. “Why the fuck did you do that, man?”
Tim was about to slide into the passenger seat but stopped himself and stood back up to look at the driver and captain of the defensive side of the school’s varsity football team. “What are you talking about? I got a map to the real party right here,” Tim answered, a bit confused by his friends’ change in attitude.
“Dude, never. Never. Never. Never ever get between a brotha and his food. It’s almost as bad as trying to change the radio station on a brotha’s car. While he is driving!” Everyone in the car began laughing. “I was ready to tear Ferris Bueller apart and feed him to his groupies!”
Frank smiled from behind the wheel and started the car rapidly. Tim almost didn’t get himself completely into the vehicle. The boisterous laughs brought a feeling of fun back to the night rather than the nerves forming about a party being too wild. The added adventure of coming so close to getting into a fight also upped the group’s testosterone levels off the charts.
A few minutes later, they pulled up to a house much more down to earth than the palatial estate earlier in the night. There were no easy-to-find parking spots anywhere close to the party house.
“Yep, that’s it. Just gotta find a parking spot, and yo, all of y’all remember where we parked cause Imma gonna get fucked up tonight!”
Frank found a spot just in front of the house next door to the party. The two houses shared the end of a cul-de-sac with no others located along the sides entering the cul-de-sac. That kept a majority of the noise away from the nearby houses. The effect was more noticeable the closer the guys walked onto the party house property.
Several classmates began raucous cheering for the arrival of some of the biggest stars from the football team. Frank, Tim, Johnnie, Tony, Jeff, and Mark crossed the street toward the house hosting the party like they already owned the place. Once recognized, they did hold the spot. The cheers blew the roof off as the group made their way into the party. Red Solo cups, filled to the brim with beer, made their way into each guy’s hand when the guys moved further into the party crowd. Friends and other teammates greeted them along the way.
Frank was an old hand at this partying, being a three-year starter on the Roosevelt football team. He pulled Tim along with him, and they pushed their way to the DJ booth in a far corner of the rec room.
A guy Tim had seen in the school halls but had never actually met yet was busily getting the next track ready at his DJ booth. In the past, two separate CD players would be side-by-side, and the DJ would need to time the transition from the beat of one song to blend perfectly with the beginning of the next. With more sophisticated computer programs and digitally-stored music, the DJ just selected the next song. It all worked seamlessly.
“Trey, my man. Have you met Mayhem?” Frank asked in introduction when they finally reached the DJ booth.
“Naw, man, I haven’t had the chance. Mayhem! My pleasure. You playing one great fuckin’ season, ain’t ya?” the skinny, auburn-haired classmate said with an offered hand. It soon melded into one of the complicated handshakes that Tim found himself easily understanding. He had not understood before, but he found he enjoyed the camaraderie the brief dance gave between the participants.
“Trey, here, was one of the best wide receivers in town, back as a freshman, but he hurt his knee and decided to stay away from Big John and his fucked-up rules. My man, here, is now one of the most sought-after DJ for parties, concerts, or weddings. My man, here, has his future set and looking prosperous,” Frank offered. Then he and Trey shared another complicated handshake.
“Hey, I can’t complain. I would have loved to have played ball with you guys this year, that’s for fuckin’ sure!”
“You graduating this year, like old man Frank?” Tim asked and quickly dodged the faux-right hook.
“Naw, I got one more year at the ‘Velt, and I’m out. I got enough work, though. I could quit school now and be set, but I promised my mom I would finish high school,” Trey explained as he got the next track ready.
“Yo! I need to make an announcement. You got me?” Frank asked Trey, who looked back down at his computer and answered with a thumbs up. Frank grabbed Trey’s microphone on the table and waited for his cue.
“Hey, yo, what’s up!” Frank yelled into the microphone. Trey quickly reset the levels to ensure the speakers didn’t blow out. Frank looked back at Trey and nodded his apologies which Trey promptly approved.
“Hey, yo, thank y’all of you for coming out to celebrate this year in Roosevelt football!” Frank waited a moment while the crowd settled back down. “We had ourselves a great year, and we sure as hell ain’t done yet!” Another brief pause as the crowd had to wind down again. “Thanks to my man, Mayhem, we are poised to go far in the playoffs and show all these muthas that they shouldn’t have forgotten about TR!” The cheering took almost a full minute to die down.
“Now, I got a quick announcement, and I wanted to let everyone here know first since y’all is my people. I had a text message from my Pops waiting for me when we got back to the locker room tonight,” Frank paused briefly and was fighting to keep his composure. Mayhem thought Frank was pretty quiet in the car on the way to the party, unlike the other guys, but he gave no hint of a big announcement.
“My Pops opened a letter I got since he knew I was waiting on it, and it’s official – your boy is gonna be a Longhorn!” Frank wiped his eyes, and the crowd seemed to surge from the other rooms and the front and backyards. It took a second before the crowd erupted and started congratulating him.
Tim got himself all caught up in the emotions and grabbed Frank from behind. He wrapped him up into a bear hug and began swinging him from side to side. Frank shrieked at first because, being a big guy, he was not used to being manhandled like this. He quickly discovered who was running the circus ride he was on, though, and allowed himself to feel the adulation.
“Yo, mutha, why didn’t you say anything in the car? Shit, you were holding that in the whole time!” Tim said rapid-fire as the well-wishers around them subsided.
Frank just smiled and gave Tim a deep hug. Then he led Tim to the far side of the DJ booth while motioning for a couple of the other teammates to make a wall for him for a moment.
“I have always wanted to go to UT ... ever since I was a boy. I figured my only chance was through football, and while I have good stats and good film and what-not, no one was paying any attention cause we was losing. This year, that changed. You changed it.
“They got in touch with me after the Judson game, and they were impressed. When they saw that one, they decided to go back and look at my other games. They must have liked what they saw.” Frank started tearing up again. “It’s all because of you, man. It’s all because of you!” Frank was hugging Tim so hard it was like they were floating in the middle of the ocean while sharing a single safety ring.
“Naw, man, it’s all you, dawg. It’s all you,” Tim gushed to his defensive captain.
“My man! Is it true? I was out back! I can’t believe it! Is it true?” Troy Williams was pushing his way through the last few people who couldn’t get out of his way fast enough.
“Son of a bitch, you made it!” Troy and Frank were hugging each other. Several teammates and friends were now also needing to dry their faces.
Several minutes flew by with teammate after teammate making a point to personally congratulate Frank on getting an offer from his number-one-choice school.
Somehow, the beer began to flow freely, and Tim realized he was on his fourth beer and was not feeling the effects.
“We have already repaired the different systems within your body to bring them to their absolute peak of efficiency. The repairs include your body’s ability to handle alcohol and keep your other systems from feeling its effects.”
Tim raised his empty cup as he mimed taking a final drink. “So, what does all that mean for me?”
“It means it would take ingesting approximately 17 times more alcohol within three hours for you to feel any of the after-effects.” Tim smiled to himself. Then just below his sightline, “End of message.”
“And what are you smiling about?” Tim recognized one of the three triplets standing beside him. It took a second, but he knew it was Margie, the oldest of three triplets who had moved into the house next door to Tim’s just the past weekend.
“Did you hear his announcement?” Tim asked the oldest of the blondes.
She was dressed in what he had discovered was their standard uniform of skin-tight jeans and a loose-fitting red blouse. It looked like silk and made her skin sparkle. A moment later, Tim realized it was probably the glitter on her skin that made it glisten. She shook her head no to his question when she saw who Tim was pointing at.
“He got a football scholarship to play at UT in Austin.”
She nodded her understanding and raised her glass his way as an approval, “Awesome, but why is that a big thing? He looks like he should have gotten that years ago.”
“Well, Roosevelt has or rather had a reputation for being not that great at football. Now we are on a winning streak, and the colleges are beginning to notice. I heard a few other guys on the team have also been getting recruitment stuff this season so far.”
“What about you?” she inquired as she took another drink.
“What about me?”
“Do you get recruitment stuff from schools, or do you already know where you want to go?”
“Yeah, I’m getting stuff, too, but I still haven’t decided where I’d like to go. But yeah, I’m getting boxes of it almost every day. I gotta go to the post office to pick it up since it takes up too much room on the mail truck when they deliver.”
“Bull. You’re just messing with me,” she responded with a glare.
“Nah, I’m serious.” Tim quickly pulled out his phone and lined up a few of the pictures his sister had taken of him going through the box he or his dad picks up every day. Margie lifted the phone from his hand and surveyed the pictures for herself.
“What are you doing, sis?” The middle triplet, followed by the little sister, took their places along each side of their big sister. They peeked over her shoulder.
“Tim’s friend got a football scholarship to UT at Austin, and I asked if he was getting scholarships from any college yet. He told me they can’t deliver it to the house because it is too much stuff for the little mail truck to carry every day.”
Both sisters almost mimicked their older sister, “Bull!”
Margie waved the phone in front of their faces. Picture after picture showed piles of pamphlets and letters from colleges all over the country. It was easy to tell it was not the same picture taken several times.
“Carmen likes to take pictures of the piles and put them on both mine and her social media. She’s really into that stuff. Me, not so much,” Tim explained. “Apparently, she is becoming very popular because she shares much more of this online than I do, and people are looking to her for information about where I’m gonna go to school. I mean, I’m just a freshman. I’ve got some time to think about it.”
After Margie returned Tim’s phone, he got his cup refilled. He took a gulp of his drink and then continued their conversation.
“What are you guys doing here? How’d you even know about or get invited to a party like this?”
Each girl had the same look of astonishment on their face as if Tim had just asked the stupidest question of all time. Then they glanced at each other and seemed to have a conversation without a word said. They all took in a breath, stood up straighter, and threw a ‘Derek Zoolander - Blue Steel’ look at Tim. It took his heart a moment to catch itself.
“I got the invite on Monday after third period,” Marcia bragged.
“I got invited right before second period on Monday,” Marcie tried to upstage her sister.
“I got it in the parking lot when we arrived Monday morning,” Margie proudly revealed.
“Oh, that’s why that dude ran up to you on Monday morning,” Marcie remembered, but the three girls couldn’t hold up the joke any longer and slowly broke into a giggle.
Tim couldn’t decide which was a better look, their Zoolander impressions or their genuine laughs. Both were easy to consider as heart attack starters.
The party seemed to kick up several notches with new arrivals hearing Frank’s news. Tim found himself hanging out for a lot of the night with Trey. Tim discovered he liked the guy. Trey even remembered Tim from his lone exploit to gain a little notoriety back in middle school when he was still a short, fat, and quiet guy.
“Dude, I remember back in eighth grade,” Trey mused, using his hands a lot to emphasize his points. “I guess you were in sixth, that you were on that Academic Pentathlon team, and you guys whipped everyone’s ass in that competition.”
“You remember that?”
“Oh, yeah! What I really remember was the principal calling the school to the auditorium to suck you guys’ dicks in front of the whole school,” Trey kidded as he scratched an itch on his temple.
“Why did you remember that? You weren’t on any of the teams yourself, were you?” Tim queried, not sure where Trey was going with this.
“No, I remembered because I had a test that day in English, and I didn’t study. So when we were pulled out of class to go to the auditorium, I shot myself over there quick, fast, and in a hurry so I could get a seat and read the last couple of chapters that I had not read yet.
“I had just finished it when the principal started talking, and for some reason, I paid attention. It was like if y’all hadn’t whopped ass in an academic competition, I would not have finished reading a book I was supposed to for class,” Trey finished and took a drink from a water bottle. “You know the really funny bit?” Trey asked.
“What’s that?” Tim wondered aloud.
“For the fucking life of me, I can’t remember what the fuck that book was.”
Both of them started laughing so loud it caught the attention of several others. Trey quickly upped the beat for the next song, and everyone forgot the laughs and started moving on the dance floor.
A few minutes later, Trey started up another conversation. “I will tell you something I do remember. I remember what you looked like back then. Fucking hell, my guy. What is the story there?”
Tim liked Trey and decided to tell him how he had changed. “Well, I got a tapeworm from swimming in Salado Creek.” Not the real story, but it was the tale he had accepted early on.
“Hold up. That little creek out by Krueger?”
“One and the same.”
“I always thought that was where the sewer system from the city backed into. Yeah, when the creek floods, like half of it is the shit water from the sewers,” Trey remembered.
“Yeah, that was what my mom used to say, and you’re right, it is, but the area where I liked to go was just a hop, skip, and a jump away from the crib. The water always looked clean where I went, and you could see clear down to the bottom of this little natural pool where I liked to go,” Tim explained.
“Anyways, I got a tapeworm from there, most likely ... still not quite sure ... but I ended up having to spend a few days in the hospital because I had like this fifteen-pound shit, and it smelled something God-awful, lemme tell ya!”
Trey and several people in hearing distance of their group were laughing almost uncontrollably.
Frank, Tim, and Trey were standing outside, in the house’s backyard, in line for another beer. The kegs inside the house were now floating, and rumor had it the kegs outback were still flowing, so most of the party animals decided to go outside for a few breaths of fresh air. The story proved true, but the kegs were beginning to show signs of quickly emptying.
“Hello?” Frank answered his phone, “Wait for just a second, can you say that again?” A huge smile lit up across his face like sunrise at dawn. He hung up and directed his friends, “Come on inside. Something is comin’ on the news we gots to see!”
Frank grabbed Tim by his shirt and pulled Tim into the house at a quick step, only slowing to avoid running over other party guests.
“What is it, Frank?” Tim demanded as he dodged and squished his way through the crowds parting in Frank’s wake.
“It’s good, man. It’s really good,” Frank answered cryptically.
In the main living room, Frank stood in front of the 75-inch, wall-mounted TV that was currently off. Frank feverishly looked around the TV then turned around to survey the immediate area, obviously looking for the remote control to turn it on.
Trey, running behind Frank and Tim, went to his DJ rig and set up a simple, extended, 15-minute remix version of some popular tune. The remote control Frank was desperately trying to find in the desk drawer was underneath Trey’s DJ rig. He turned down the music, making several dancers moan their disapproval but also gaining the attention of others in the room.
“What channel, Frank?”
“Put it on ESPN. My dad said we made ESPN!” The crowd gasped and crowded around in front of the TV.
“Are you shitting us?” Someone from the crowd yelled.
“Well, we about to find out!”
The TV fired on, displaying the local news channel, but Trey changed it to ESPN. “Welcome back to SportsCenter. I’m still Scott Van Pelt, and you’re not.” Tim smiled at the bad joke.
The bald and bespectacled sportscaster introduced an NBA basketball game that had just finished late. The Sacramento Kings did not do very well against the Los Angeles Lakers.
“Woohoo! Lakers!” cheered somewhere in the back of the room. Several people snickered at what was a weak joke. When Van Pelt launched into another NBA game from the east coast, Trey turned down the TV all the way and turned the music up again. However, he kept his headphones on and listened to the NBA report. He was waiting for the ESPN host to talk about Roosevelt football.
Frank looked at the TV, perplexed as if it had turned itself down. Suddenly, he turned to the DJ. “What the fuck did you do that for, Trey?”
“I don’t think they give a damn about those games, but when he gets ready to turn over to y’all, I’ll turn that shit back up,” Trey answered while waving his hand to the crowd. Frank turned around and continued watching the sports broadcast while it was on mute.
After more stories about the night in basketball and then about an NFL player arrested for DUI, the lead overnight sportscaster for ESPN turned to look at the camera just off his left shoulder. A graphic appeared on the wall behind him.
“I’m a huge college football fan just like everyone else who works here, but I’m not one of these freaks who keep track of middle-schoolers and their supposed college-ready rocket arms at quarterback. Down in San Antonio, Texas, though, there is a kid who is not in middle school, but he is just a ninth-grader playing football for the first time in his life. He had never played a game, at any level, in his life. But he has turned his high school team into a true threat for the state championship in the state that claims to have the most complete and best high school football in the country. Some in California, Florida, and Georgia might want to discuss that assertion a little further but make no mistake, none of them want to try their luck against Tim Murphy and the Roosevelt Rough Riders.” Van Pelt turned to his co-host, seated on the other side of the desk.
“We’re going to show you some of the highlights of their win tonight against a nearby rival school, the MacArthur Brahmas. Now, I’m sure they have many good kids there at MacArthur High in San Antonio, but they are not anywhere near the level of Tim Murphy and his teammates at Roosevelt.”
The graphic showing over Van Pelt’s shoulder was a picture of the final score showing on the scoreboard at the football stadium. It read 84-0.
Van Pelt animatedly looked over his shoulder then back at the camera. “That ain’t a misprint, people. Roosevelt won their Friday night game over MacArthur, 84-0, and the star of the Roosevelt team only played in the first half, but in that half registered ... get this,” he added while dramatically reading off a sheet of paper in front of him, “Murphy got 14 quarterback sacks. He forced six fumbles while recovering four of them himself. He got two interceptions and ran one of them back for a touchdown. Let’s show you these highlights from this game, and you can see them for yourself.”
The picture over his shoulder morphed from the final score into highlights of Mayhem’s outstanding plays. He ran over and through practically each MacArthur player that even tried to get in front of him.
“Now, don’t go thinking we pulled these together from like eight or nine different games! This is pulled together from one game via the guys at UTR Highlight videos on YouTube. They recently announced they were going to spend the entire next season following the exploits of the San Antonio Roosevelt Rough Riders ... every week. Texas high school football gained a reality TV show, and it’s going to stream for the whole world to watch on YouTube.”
The film started with the opening play of the game. Tim lined up in his normal right-side defensive end position. At the snap of the ball, it looked like Tim shot out of a cannon, and he went right through the left side of the offensive line. The left guard barely reached Tim to attempt a block before being knocked down. Tim sacked the quarterback and the running back waiting for the football.
The next play saw Tim line up directly in front of the center as a nose tackle. On the snap of the ball, Tim fired out, now at the center. While the center could snap the ball back to his quarterback in a shotgun formation, Tim got his hands underneath the centers’ armpits and lifted him off the field. Then he shot-put the center at the quarterback. The quarterback was looking at his wide receiver trying to get open to receive the ball, but the center landed on top of the quarterback, and the ball went bouncing.
Tim went down into his practiced, four-legged run, like some jungle cat. He scooped up the fumble and tossed it back to Jeff Smith, the senior defensive lineman. Jeff ran 28 yards to put the RoughRiders on the scoreboard first.
Jeff had volunteered to change positions rather than lose his spot on Mayhem’s first day of practice with the varsity squad. The two quickly became friends. Friendship has its rewards since the film footage showed Tim was not in any danger of being caught by the offense if he were to run it in himself.
The following highlighted play had Mayhem lined up over the center, once again. The ball sailed over the quarterback’s head when it was snapped, and he had to run after the awkwardly bouncing ball before being sacked by Tommy James, the senior left-side defensive end. Tommy was able to beat his block quickly and catch the quarterback right when he got control of the errant snap. They continued showing play-after-play of the Rough Rider defense, led by Mayhem and Frank Robinson, with almost endless examples of the Brahmas being outmatched at every position on the field.
The fantastically over-the-top razzing from two over-the-hill former athletes against the kids from MacArthur forced Tim to start to feel bad. “Damn, those two are being a little too rough with those Mac kids! Shit, they didn’t quit; they just couldn’t stop you,” Taylor Benson, the quarterback from Lee High School, commented. “I seem to remember what that felt like.”
To read the complete story you need to be logged in:
Log In or
Register for a Free account
(Why register?)
* Allows you 3 stories to read in 24 hours.