Chapter 26: Medical News and Psychological Gains

When I got to my history class, Denise told me that she had an attempted groping incident as she walked in the hall with her Guardian. She told me what happened.

“Two guys came up to me and one asked if they could feel me between my legs and I refused.

“Then the other said, ‘Hey, her friend isn’t here to protect her. You grab and hold her and then I’ll hold her so you’ll get a turn.’

“He went to grab me but I was holding my whistle and blew it, and at the same second the Guardian was blowing hers. Two teachers came running and grabbed the guys. The Guardian told them what happened. I was so weak from the shock that I had sunk to the floor and the Guardian helped me stand and got me to the classroom. They took the two boys away and the Guardian went after them after she brought me here.”

“Wow. You ok now?” I took her hand. “You’re not shaking now and your color is good.”

“Yeah, I’m better. You know, if this had happened on Monday, I would have collapsed, so that’s a good sign, right?”

“I think. Say, you could use this as one of your ‘in viva’ examples and give it a score, right?”

She giggled. “It’s in vivo—vivo. I think that those are supposed to be voluntary exposures, not ones forced on me. But maybe.”

“Well, look at it this way. It’s not like your first assault by the bastard. This time it happened in a safe location with all kinds of safety controls and they worked, and you came out of it ok and maybe a little stronger too. Look at it that way. Look at the positive side.”

“Kevin, you know, you sound like my therapists. That’s what both of them kept telling me.”

“Maybe there’s something in it then, don’t you think?”

She started to answer but the bell rang and we had to sit. History and English classes passed with no incidents. Maybe I need to have those classes all day long. Real learning, no interruptions, no Program games.

After classes ended, Denise ran off again to get to her therapy session and I wandered off to the main doors for the dressing show. There always were a few people who tried to get their last-minute Requests in before the naked kids could dress, so it was a race to get dressed quickly. So when I got there, everyone had already gotten their clothes on and a number of disappointed Requesters were trying to insist that their Requests had to be honored even by the clothed students. That didn’t work.

But when I appeared, they turned on me with a flurry of Requests. I had a simple solution: I left the steps area and went over to the apron near the driveway, fifteen feet away.

“I decline the Request because I’m not in school, school is over, and this is not a school activity. Bye,” and walked to my car.

I got in my car and then remembered that I hadn’t checked my messages since the morning. Wow, did all that stuff happen only this morning? The first voicemail was from Dr Worthington. He asked if I could come to his med school office between 3 and 4 pm today and to call if I could, otherwise to call his regular office for an appointment. I returned his call and said I could get to the school in twenty minutes.

“Thanks for coming in on such short notice, Kevin,” he said when I had seated myself in his tiny, spartan office.

He saw me looking around. “Yeah, it’s pretty spare, right? This is the kind of office they give to their clinical faculty. We’re just docs for hire and not regular university faculty. Anyway, Dr Carey noticed something in the data files you sent from your first few sessions that looked anomalous—not at all like her PE patients, so she showed the data to her neurologist colleague. Tell me, do you ride a bicycle or motorcycle?”

I answered no.

“What about horses?”

“No...”

“Do you do gymnastics?”

“Not that either.”

“Hmmm. The signs show a pudendal nerve injury. Did you ever have a blow to your perineum? That’s the area between the testicles and anus.”

“Oh. Oh, yeah, that’s right. Let me think when that happened. I was learning taekwondo and once, when I was maybe 14 years old, I got kicked between my legs from behind. It was an accident; someone was sparring in back of me, did a kick and missed his partner, but he was much too close to me. My left leg was way up in the air because I was in the middle of a practice kick and he caught me right in the groin with his heel. It really hurt a lot; I couldn’t walk for two days, and I think it was swollen for more than a week.”

“Yes. That fits then. Kevin, you do have that penile sensitivity from the phimosis, but the major problem isn’t that. The pain is coming from a condition called pudendal nerve entrapment. Describe the pain for me. Do you have it when you sit for a while or is it worse toward the end of the day?”

“Yes to both of those.”

“Ok, and the quality of the pain: is it a burning, a numbness, a stabbing pain, knife-like or aching pain, a hot poker sensation, or painful erections or pain on moving your penis?

“Yes to many of those, especially burning, hot poker, stabbing sometimes, mainly around the base of my penis.”

“Is that what seems to be the primary location of the pain? Do you also have it with bowel movements, or does it get worse with sitting a long time, or after running or walking long distances, or lower behind your testicular area?”

“Mostly in the front, around my penis, and moving it around with an erection is very painful. The other areas hardly at all.”

“Well, it looks like we may have got your answer, son. This is a nerve injury that is actually fairly simple to pinpoint by MRI—actually a procedure developed some years ago called magnetic resonance neurography—and repair with a fairly minor procedure. This used to be a difficult problem to diagnose and treat but is no longer. The neurologists here treat this condition and have an excellent outcome rate. But I think that your case may be simpler to treat, since it seems to be isolated to one specific branch of the nerve, toward its distal end. I believe that when you received that trauma from the kick, it caused some internal bleeding near the nerve and then scar tissue formed in that area. Scarring has been known to cause nerve conduction problems because the scar tissue is somewhat rigid and presses on the nerve.

“So my thinking now is that this is a simple nerve impingement from the trauma and not structural issues like a narrowing of the canals that the nerve passes through. Before referring you for a neurology consultation or doing those tests I mentioned, I want you to try some physical therapy. Stretching the muscles and ligaments in the perineal area has been shown to break up scarring and loosen the tissues around the nerve. Here’s the phone number of a good therapist who knows how to treat that kind of perineal injury.”

“Do I still use that cuff thing at night?”

“Oh, yes, continue using the TNS. That’s treating the penile sensitivity problem and the data for that treatment shows progress. Have you noticed any difference in your penile sensitivity, especially for erections?”

“As a matter of fact, yes, now that I know that there are two different conditions, pain and sensitivity. I’m having less disturbing sensitivity with both my erect and normal penis.”

“So keep that treatment going and we’ll see you for that problem next week, then. And make that PT appointment.”

As I drove home, I couldn’t believe what I had heard in Dr Worthington’s office. Wow, what kind of news was that? Maybe I’ll be like a normal teen soon. That would be fantastic. Then my mobile rang and I pulled over to answer it. Yeah, I know. I’m a responsible person and don’t believe in distracted driving. The call was from Denise.

“Hi, do I have news for you,” she said.

“Hi, do I have news for you,” I said.

She giggled. “I said it first, so I get to tell you first.” Then her voice took on a plaintive tone. “Please, sweetie, could you come over again this evening?”

“Sure, but supper’s on me this time; let’s do take-in. What do you like?”

“Oh, cool, thanks. There’s a great Thai restaurant on Coller and Main, you know where that is? Anything on their menu is great.”

“How’d you know that I love Thai?”

“Oh, right, you used to live near there. Cool.”

“I’ll see if they have any of my favorites and we’ll see if we have similar tastes, ok? What time is good?”

We fixed the time for me to come and then I asked, “Should I get enough food for your mom, too?”

“No, she’ll be at a friend’s house all evening and she’s having dinner there.”

We gave our farewells and then I continued driving home. I chatted with Aunt Helene, who joked that I might just as well move in with Denise, and then went to my room to get some work done. Next I went on line to the restaurant’s site, checked the menu, and placed my order. Finally I cleaned up and went to pick up dinner and go to Denise.

When I arrived, I asked her what her special news was, and she told me, “Later. And tell me yours later, too. Remember, I go first.”

The dinner was great. For me, this was not real Thai; it was kind-of-Thai, but quite close and very good. I think it was Thai in a Cantonese style. Anyway, Denise liked my selections, although they weren’t her favorites. I promised to take her there for dinner and we made a date for Saturday.

After dinner, instead of going to the living room, Denise led me down a hall to where I assumed her bedroom was, and I could see from her body language that she was forcing herself to go. I took her hand, stopped her, and turned her around.

“Denise, something’s really bothering you. Are we going to your bedroom?”

“Yes,” she squeaked.

“And you’re scared.”

“Uh, yeah. That’s where the bastard tried to rape me. I’m afraid of those memories.”

“You don’t have to do this, you know. We can sit in the living room.”

“No, this is part of what I need to tell you. I have to push myself. I agreed with Dr Rousis that I was ready for this step.”

We entered her room. I had never been in a girl’s room before, but it fit all of my mental images of what one should look like. Light pink walls, flowery curtains, stuffed animals, frilly bedspread, it had it all. It was a light and airy room and suited Denise perfectly. She sat on her bed, holding her body very stiffly, so I turned the desk chair around, moved it closer to her, and sat in it.

“Um, why are you sitting there?”

“Denise, you’re so uncomfortable that I don’t want to stress you any more than necessary. I think that having a guy sitting on your bed with you would be over the top, correct?”

“Uh, that’s actually what had me scared the most.” She relaxed and the effect was dramatic. “You always seem to know what I need, Kevin. You’re so amazing.”

“I’m simply picking up on the cues your body is signaling, Denise. You’re really a very open person; very expressive. So is it time for your news yet?”

She blushed and looked down. “I guess. Kevin, this is going to be hard to tell. I rehearsed it all afternoon and I’m still terribly nervous about how to say this...”

Shit. She’s gonna tell me that she doesn’t want to see me anymore.

“Ok, here goes. Kevin, remember this morning when you were patting my privates ... oh, now I forgot where I was going to start this. There’s so many details...”

Oh, phew. She’s not dumping me.

“Denise, remember what I told Fletcher on the day I first saw you? Start at the beginning and go step by step; that’s usually the simplest.”

“Um, well, yeah, maybe ... Ok, let me try that. Going way back. Ok. I’m not on the Shot, you know? It’s required for high school girls to have it because of the Program and the school wants to avoid pregnancy and STDs with the Program kids. But I have a school exemption because the Shot can cause hormonal balance problems that would interfere with my therapy ... No, please don’t interrupt, I’m getting to it now.

“So the reason I mentioned that isn’t because I’m afraid I’ll get pregnant; it’s to explain this morning. I’m sure you remember Thursday morning in the CoffeeShak.”

“Um ... Last Thursday? What happened?”

“Yeah, right. Funny you’re not. Do you remember why I needed to stop? Yeah, I figured. Boys don’t have to think about that stuff. I needed to get some feminine hygiene products—menstrual pads—because my period was about to start and I’m very regular. The Shot affects girls’ periods but I’m not on it. It was a good thing I did get the pads because my period began on Friday and I wouldn’t have been able to get any Thursday after school.

“I’ve been using the pads all this week and remember this morning, when you and the boy were feeling me and I said ‘no lower’? Well, I was embarrassed that you’d feel the pad, first, and second, my-pussy-was-drooling-so-much-I-thought-my-period-had-started-all-over-again.”

The last had come out in a rush and then Denise relaxed again.

“There, I said it. I thought I wouldn’t be able to get that out. So I changed the pad and noticed that the flow was clear and my period was probably over, but still used a fresh one just in case. Well, after lunch, when I watched Sarah and Andrew making love, I got so damned hot that I think I came in my pants. I’ve never had an orgasm before but watching them got me so hot, like a spring being wound up, and then it snapped and I felt a gusher come out of my pussy. I could tell that you felt me have a physical reaction and I saw the result in your tights. You have a really big one, you know?” she giggled.

“Yes, sweetie, I did feel your emotional aura. You had the same effect on me that the lovers had on you, it seems.”

She giggled again, nervously. “Anyway, that pad was totally soaked. And when I wiped it up, I noticed that when I cleaned myself up and wiped myself there, this time it caused only a little discomfort. I mentioned it to Dr Rousis and she asked me to touch myself again, and again it was bearable—not pain, but just a kind of anxiety like something bad would happen but it didn’t. Oh, this is so hard to talk about...”

She was shaking like a leaf now. I reached out and took her hand, and then she pulled on my hand, drawing me toward her.

“I need you to hold me now. I feel so safe when you do.”

I sat next to her, embraced her, and she went on.

“So after my session, I decided that I was ready to ... I would ... uh, you know, the in vivo thing, stretch my limits, go another step. What I mean ... oh, damn. I can’t say it. What you did with me outside school this morning. Can we do that now?”

“Denise, are you really sure you can stand that? Did your therapist say you could do petting safely?”

“Ummm, she did say that I could now go as far as I could stand, and I know ... oh this is so terrible of me, I don’t want to say it...”

“Denise, say it. It’s hurting you and you need to get it out in the open.”

“No, it’s not about me, it’s you.”

“Me? Nothing you say can hurt me—uh, unless it’s that you don’t wanna be my girlfriend. Now that would hurt me lots.”

She made a shaky giggle. “Oh, not that! But promise you won’t get mad?”

“Let me check my bones. Nope, not a mad one in there, cleaned them all this morning.”

Now she laughed. “You dork! Trust you to joke about serious stuff.”

I put a finger on her lips. “Just say what you need to, Denise. I’m a good listener.”

“Aaahhhh.” she sighed. “Ok, what I meant is that you’re safe to be around. Even though I trust you in my mind, my body shouts ‘MAN! BEWARE!’ Please don’t think I’m awful for bringing up your disability, but that makes my body think you’re safe, too. It’s like you’ve got a gun, and it can be loaded too, but there’s no trigger to pull.”

I roared in laughter. That was one of the best lines I had ever heard. Denise looked at me in confusion.

“You’re not angry? I just insulted your manhood terribly!”

“No, no, no, not at all, sweetie. There’s nothing wrong with me that a transplant wouldn’t cure. I’m thinking brain transplant, actually.”

She laughed. “You’re unreal, you know. Most guys would have walked out after hearing that kind of insult.”

“First, I’m not like most guys—I wish I were, really. Second, I’m a realist and I work with what I’ve got, not with what I wish I had. And I never had any sexual function so I have no hangups about it. So you feel safe with me physically because your body knows that my, ahem, gun, is missing a key part, right?”

“Yeah,” she squeaked.

“Not to worry; let’s do whatever you think you want to try.”

She reached up and put her hands on my cheeks and brought her sweet lips toward mine. We kissed gently as she wrapped a hand behind my head and I reached around her and pulled her close. We rubbed our lips together for a minute and then I felt the tip of her tongue touch my lips. I pulled back.

“You ok with that, honey?”

“Mmm hmmm.”

We moved together again and resumed the kiss; I let her take the lead and just followed her as she explored this sensation. Then she opened her mouth and plunged her tongue into my mouth and we tongue-wrestled for several minutes as I felt her passion raising; she began moaning low in her throat. Keeping her kiss, she took one of my hands and put it down in her crotch. I pulled back again.

“A new level, honey?”

“Mmmm. I want to see what this feels like with no pad in the way,” she whispered and returned to our kiss.

I began to softly stroke her over her shorts, mainly staying over her mons, but then she moaned and spread her legs wide, breathing into my mouth, “Lower...”

So I moved my hand down slowly, stroking lightly and pressing firmly where I thought her clit was located, and she closed her legs, trapping my hand and voicing a little grunt.