Chapter 117

Present – Jens, Ben and Thom – In the Cobra on the way to the hospital

Thom wants to bet Ben a bottle of Knob Creek that Liz’s baby is a girl and Ben shocks us all when he replies, “Thom, it has to be something other than alcohol because I’ve decided to stop drinking.”

I immediately ask, “Ben why have you decided to stop drinking?”

Ben kisses me on the cheek and answers, “Jens, I’ve been drinking too much lately and it needs to stop.”

I smile at Ben because it reminds me of the time Daddy stopped drinking for me and agree with him, “I think that’s a wise idea and I’m going to join you...”

Having Jens on my lap has been a little uncomfortable, not because of her weight, but because of the way she’s squirming around! It’s exciting me and I really don’t want to be excited right now.

I whisper in Jens ear, “Please sit still, all your squirming is starting to get me excited.”

Jens grins at me and whispers back, “I know, I can feel it.” But of course the squirming doesn’t stop or even slow down.

I whisper a threat, “If you don’t stop, I’m going to ask Thom to stop so I can sit on your lap.”

Jens gives me an evil grin and says, “Okay I will stop for now, but it was fun while it lasted!”

I whisper a complaint, “Maybe for you, but for me it is starting to hurt.”

Jens pouts and whispers a complaint of her own, “Well that’s no fun.”

I decide that two can play this game so I slip my hand up her dress and begin to lightly stroke her behind the knee (I know she loves this).

Jens whispers another complaint, “Ben what in the heck are you doing? Thom will catch us...”

Ben and Jennifer are playing with a lot of whispering going on between them - damn they are a cute couple and I sort of wish I was younger so I could start a relationship like theirs. But I’m too damn old to be thinking of that now. Inga is in for a big surprise at how slowly I plan to proceed on our relationship. I hope eventually she will get tired and move on to someone closer to her age.

I mention to Ben, “You were right, I think we should pull off and fill up your Cobra.”

Ben exclaims, “Shit Thom, I forgot my wallet!”

Jens adds her own exclamation, “And I don’t have a purse.”

I glance over, smile and say, “Don’t worry, I’ve got some cash on me and will take care of filling up this thirsty little snake.”

Jens giggles and remarks, “Hey I like that! I think that’s what I’m going to call her, ‘Snake’.”

Ben suggests, “We could get a Cobra graphic done on the trunk while the name is being changed on the door.”

That sets Jennifer off and she complains, “I can’t believe that beotch Stacy stole my car, had it restored and then put her own fricken-fracking name on the door.”

Ben laughs and declares, “If she thought doing that would somehow make me leave my lovely and practically perfect wife, she must really be crazy.”

Jens picks up on my words and immediately complains, “What the heck is this practically perfect? I thought I was perfect.”

Ben whispers something in Jennifer’s ear, she blushes and says, “Thank you for explaining that comment.”

I ask, “So what did Ben say?”

Jennifer blushes again and replies, “It’s private and Ben don’t you dare tell him!”

I taunt, “So Jennifer, do you always hen-peck your husband?”

Jennifer exclaims, “Hen-fricken-peck, what in the heck do you mean?”

I laugh and Ben consoles her, “Jens, Thom’s just pulling your leg.” He continues with, “Thom pull into that gas station.”

Then he swears, “Shit! I wish I had asked Stacy something about the rebuild on the Cobra.”

I query, “What’s that?”

Ben explains, “The 427 needs premium gas, which is almost unavailable anymore. I wonder if she got it setup to use gasohol.”

I look at the pumps as we pull in and remark, “Well, you either have low octane ‘normal’ gas or high octane gasohol.”

Ben submits, “Well, I guess we will try gasohol.”

I pull up to the highest octane gasohol pump they have, exit the Cobra and Ben announces, “Jens, I need to stretch my legs.”

Jennifer opens the door, climbs off Ben’s lap and it’s all I can do to keep from laughing since Ben has a major tent in his pants (Hell I would too if she was sitting on my lap). He sits in the seat until he relaxes, exits that car, comes over to me and says, “Thanks for not saying anything about that.”

I act like I don’t know what he’s talking about and ask, “What are you talking about?”

Ben says, “Thom, I noticed where your eyes went when Jens got out of the car so don’t try to bullshit me.”

I laugh and remark, “Damn, you don’t miss anything.”

Ben replies, “Most of the time I don’t, but sometimes I do. Are you watching the crowd we’ve attracted?”

I reply, “Hell yes and I’ve seen them too. Don’t worry, I will move in such a way that my gun is exposed, that should chase them off.”

Yeah, the Cobra had attracted the interest of a couple of undesirable looking men. I make sure my coat falls open so they see the pistol on my hip. The snake was full so I head into the store to pay for the gas and one of them says as I pass, “That’s a nice car of yours.”

I ignore the comment, head in to pay for the gas and things go to hell in a handbasket quickly. The guys walk in behind me and one of them orders, “Don’t turn around and hand me your gun using two fingers.”

I never get to react because I hear a couple loud as hell cracks and the guys begin to scream. I turn around and see that Ben had come in behind them and had beaten the shit out of them with a tire iron.

I pull my pistol, display my badge, flash the guy behind the counter and order, “Call the police...”

There are idiots born all the time. The two guys head in the store after Thom so I go to the Cobra, open the trunk, pull out the tire iron and Jens asks, “What are you doing now?”

I smile at her and reply, “Those two guys are behind Thom in the store and are going to try to rob the store and take your Cobra.”

Jens says, “No one is taking my Snake again. I knew I should have brought a gun.”

I order, “Stay here and I will take care of them.”

She complains, “No way in heck, I’m backing you up.”

I order, “Then take off those loud-assed shoes so we can sneak up on them.”

She slips off her shoes then we sneak into the store behind the two guys. I wait until they try to take Thom’s gun and club the shit out of both of them with the tire iron.

Thom takes control of the situation, looks at me and asks, “Damn did you really need the tire iron? Hell you broke their arms and cracked their skulls.”

He sees Jens behind me and asks, “And what are you doing here?”

Jens answers, “Taking care of my man!”

I reply, “I used the tire iron because I didn’t want to get my dress blues dirty.”

Thom says, “Well, we will need to wait for the police to show up and give them our statements so we’re going to be here awhile.”

Jens complains, “Dang it! I guess we will miss the birth of Liz’s baby.”

I hand my phone to her and suggest, “Give them a call and let them know.”

Jens makes the call while I watch the two idiots laying on the floor in front of Thom, they finally wake up and begin to whine.

Thom comes over and says, “Thanks for covering my six.”

I reply, “No problem, I knew what was happening when they followed you into the store.”

Jens comes over and says, “Well they made it to the hospital just fine and Liz is in the delivery room. I guess it could be another few hours until she delivers so we still might make it.”

Thom says, “I should move the Cobra away from the pumps.”

I hand him the tire iron and ask, “Could you put this back in the trunk?”

He replies, “No problem.” He heads out the door and Jens says, “I’m going to go get my shoes.”

She follows him outside, I look at the two idiots and say, “You’re fucking lucky I didn’t just kill the two of you.”

One of them whines, “I wish you would have.”

The other one threatens, “We’re going to sue your ass off.”

I laugh in his face and reply, “No you won’t! You know what’s going to happen to you in prison with that broken arm? You’re going to be too busy being someone’s sweetheart to have the time to sue me.”

He begins to cry as I laugh again and taunt, “That’s right, I hope you like how your life is going to turn out.”

Jens comes back in and taunts them too, “So you two idiots thought you were going to steal my car? You’re lucky you didn’t try because I would have killed you.”

Thom has parked the Cobra and comes back in as the police arrive. He flashes his badge to them and gives them a statement. When he’s done the policeman comes over to me and asks me for my statement. I tell him what happened and his only comment is that ‘I shouldn’t have taken the law into my own hands.’

Jens gets feisty and says, “Why the heck not! They planned on stealing my Cobra after they robbed the store.”

The officer looks at her and makes a huge mistake when he says, “That’s a nice looking car. If it’s yours you must be Stacy.”

Thom begins to laugh and Jens practically explodes, “Heck no! I’m not that Stacy beotch! She stole my car and had her name put on the door instead of mine.”

The officer looks confused so I say, “It’s a long story that’s already been taken care of. Jens my love, don’t we need to get to the hospital?”

Jens apologizes, “Sorry officer, Ben’s right. This is a long story and we do need to get to the hospital where my best friend is having a baby.”

Thom comes over and asks the officer, “We really need to go if you don’t need anything else from us.”

The officer says, “No, I have everything I need.”

We head out the Cobra, I climb in and Jens sits on my lap again. Thom starts the Cobra and we head toward the hospital...

Present – Bernie and Liz – At the hospital

We made it to the hospital just fine and expected Ben and Jennifer to be behind us but they weren’t. Because we had already done the paperwork, we were hustled into the delivery room and Liz fretted, “Where the hell are Jens and Ben, they were right behind us.”

Liz’s mobile phone rings, she looks at it and says, “It’s Thom - he was driving the car.”