Jokes and Giggles
Chapter 961

Copyright© 2015 by Jack Spratt

Paratrooper Training:

She went through the standard training, completed the practice jumps from higher and higher structures, and finally went to take her first jump from a plane.

The next day she called home to tell her mother the news.

“So, did you jump?” asked the mother.

“Well let me tell you what happened,” the girl said.

“We got up in the plane and the sergeant opened up the door and asked for volunteers. About a dozen people got up and just walked out of the plane.”

“Is that when you jumped?” asked her mother.

“Uh, no. The sergeant started to grab the other men one at a time and throw them out the door.”

“Did you jump then?” asked her mother.

“I’m getting to that. Everyone else had jumped, and I was the last one left on the plane. I told the sergeant that I was too scared to jump. He told me to get off the plane or he’d kick my butt.”

“So, did you jump?”

“No. He tried to push me out of the plane but I grabbed onto the door and refused to go. Finally, he called over the Jump Master. The Jump Master is this great big guy about six-foot six, and 280 pounds. He said to me, ‘Are you gonna jump or not?’ I said, ‘No sir, I’m too scared.’ So, the Jump Master pulled down his zipper and took out his Johnson. I swear, Mom, it was about ten inches long and big around as a baseball bat! He said, ‘Either you jump out that door or I’m sticking this bad boy right up your ass.’”

“So, did you jump?” asked her mother.

“A little at first.”


Today is my baby girl’s 18th birthday. I be so glad that this be my last child support payment! Month after month, year after year, all those payments!

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