Jokes and Giggles
Copyright© 2015 by Jack Spratt
I failed a Health and Safety course at the Senior Center today.
One of the questions was:
"In the event of a fire, what steps would you take?"
"Fucking big ones" was apparently the wrong answer.
The Bank of Montreal was running a recent Password Audit and found Stevie
O'Toole from Conception Bay (Newfoundland)
using the following password:
When Stevie was asked why he had such a long password, he replied,
"'Lard t'underin! Are yez blind er' stupid? I wuz told me password had to be at least 8 characters long wit' one capital.''
Mick and Paddy were fishing on the Irish shoreline when Mick pulled out a cigar.
Finding he had no matches, he asked Paddy for a light.
'Ya, sure, I tink I haff a lighter, ' Paddy replied and then reaching into his tackle
box, he pulled out a Bic lighter that was an enormous 10 inches long.
'My God, man!' exclaimed Mick, taking the huge Bic lighter in his hands. 'Where'd yew git dat monster?'
'Well, ' replied Paddy, 'I got it from my Genie.'
'You haff a fecking Genie?' Mick asked.