Jokes and Giggles
Copyright© 2015 by Jack Spratt
-- YOUR AGE BY CHOCOLATE MATH
ITS FUN TIME IT ACTUALLY WORKS BOB
Y our age by Chocolate Math
This really works but don't ask me how.
Don't tell me your age;
you'd probably lie anyway,
but the Hershey Man will know! ****
YOUR AGE BY CHOCOLATE MATH
This is pretty neat.
DON'T CHEAT BY SCROLLING DOWN FIRST!
It takes less than a minute.
Work this out as you read.
*Be sure you don't read the bottom until you've worked it out!
This is not one of those waste of time things, *
1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like to have chocolate (more than once but less than 10)
2. Multiply this number by 2 (just to be bold)
3. Add 5
4. Multiply it by 50 -- I'll wait while you get the calculator
*5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1765...
If you haven't, add 1764. *
6 ... Now subtract the four digit year that you were born.
You should have a three digit number
The first digit of this was your original number
(i.e., how many times you want to have chocolate each week).
The next two numbers are
-- Oh YES, it is... !! --
/THIS IS THE ONLY YEAR (2015) IT WILL EVER WORK, /
/SO SPREAD IT AROUND WHILE IT LASTS. /****
/Chocolate //Calculator /
A SCOTSMAN'S FIRST BASEBALL GAME!
A Scotsman moves to North America and attends his first baseball game.
The first batter approaches the batters' box, takes a few swings, then hits a double.
Everyone is on their feet screaming "Run!!!"
The next batter hits a single.
The Scotsman listens as the crowd again cheers "RUN!! RUN!!".
The Scotsman is enjoying the game and begins screaming with the fans.
The fifth batter comes up and four balls go by,
The Umpire calls: "Walk."
The batter starts his slow trot to first base.
The Scot stands up and screams, "Run ye lazy bastard, run!"