Chapter 851

As we get older we sometimes begin to doubt our ability to make a difference in the world. It is at these times that our hopes are boosted by the remarkable achievements of other seniors who have found the courage to take on challenges that would make many of us wither.

Harold Schlumberg is such a person.

QUOTE FROM HAROLD: “I’ve often been asked, ‘ ... What do you old folks do now that you’re retired?’

Well, I stay active and happy. I’m fortunate to have a chemical engineering background and one of the things I enjoy most is converting beer and scotch into urine.

Then I take a jog out to the shed and piss on a picture of Justin Trudeau, Kathleen Wynne and Rachel Notley. (All Canadian Politicians)

I do this several times every day. I really enjoy it and I get my exercise too!”

Harold is an inspiration to all of us old folks.

‘****

This one is compliments of J & B.

Five surgeons from big cities are discussing who makes the Best patients to operate on. The first surgeon, from New York, says, ‘I like to see accountants on my operating table because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered.’ The second, from Chicago, responds, ‘Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is color coded.’ The third surgeon, from Dallas, says, ‘No, I really think librarians are the best, everything inside them is in alphabetical order.’ The fourth surgeon, from Los Angeles chimes in: ‘You know, I like construction workers ... Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over.’ But the fifth surgeon, from Washington, DC shut them all up when he observed: ‘You’re all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There’s no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains, and no spine ... Plus, the head and the ass are interchangeable.’