Chapter 778

This one is compliments of JT

A retiree arrives at the clinic for his annual physical. When he checks in, he learns that the physician that had been treating him for many years had been called away for a personal emergency. The clinic assigned a young doctor who had just joined the practice to conduct the physical.

When the old man goes in to see the doctor, the young doctor greets him with “Hello Mr. Smith. How can I help you? What is your complaint?”

The old man replies, “I have no complaint. I am in excellent health. I am here for my annual physical.”

The young doctor apologizes saying, “I did not intend to insult you, sir. It is just that most of my patients your age have some problems to be treated.”

The old man reiterates his assertion regarding his good health and the doctor tells him that he will conduct the physical exam after completing a medical history check list. The doctor reads the questions on the history form and checks the answers until about the middle of the form. At that point the young doctor asks the old man,

“Tell me, how old was your father when he died?”

The old man answers, “I did not tell you that my father had passed away. He is 96 years old and in excellent health just as I am.”

The young doctor is flustered and responds, “I am sorry; I did not mean to insult your father. It is just that most of my patients your age have already lost their parents.”

“I am happy to tell you that my father is doing very well,” said the old man.

“Excellent!” said the young doctor, “But in that case how old was your grandfather when he died?”

The old man replied, “I did not tell you that my grandfather had died. He is in excellent health just as my father and I are. As a matter of fact, just last week he married a young woman 25 years old.”

With this reply the young doctor has had it. He throws his hands in the air and exclaims loudly,

“Why on earth would a man that old want to marry a woman that young?”

The old man replies with a grin, “I didn’t tell you that my grandfather wanted to get married.”

This one is compliments of Rick M.

The Party Girl

During a wild party at a Long Island country house, Ivonne had too much to drink and strolled outside for some air.

Getting to a grassy field, she lay down to watch the stars. Ivonne was almost asleep when a cow, searching for clover, was carefully stepping over her.

Groggily, she raised her head and said, “One at a time, boys ... one at a time.”

Food For Thought: