Chapter 705

The Old Dog

A German shepherd starts chasing rabbits and before long, discovers that he’s lost. Wandering about, he notices a panther heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch.

The old German Shepherd thinks, “Oh, oh! I’m in deep shit now!”

Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the panther is about to leap, the old German Shepherd exclaims loudly, “Boy, that was one delicious panther! I wonder if there are any more around here.”

Hearing this, the young panther halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees.

“Whew!” says the panther, “That was close! That old German Shepherd nearly had me!”

Meanwhile, a squirrel who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the panther. So, off he goes.

The squirrel soon catches up with the panther, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the panther.

The young panther is furious at being made a fool of and says, “Here, squirrel, hop on my back and see what’s going to happen to that conniving canine!”

Now, the old German Shepherd sees the panther coming with the squirrel on his back and thinks, “What am I going to do now?” But instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn’t seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old German Shepherd says.

“Where’s that squirrel? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another panther!”

Moral of this story...

Don’t mess with the old dogs ... Age and skill will always overcome youth and treachery!

Bullshit and brilliance only come with age and experience.

If you don’t send this to five ‘old’ friends right away, there will be five fewer people laughing in the world.

Of course, I am in no way insinuating that you are old, just ‘youthfully challenged’.

You did notice the size of the print, didn’t you?

A puppy was running across the field when he came upon a railroad track. At the time there was a train going by at a medium speed. The puppy wanted to get to the other side so he sat there and watched as the cars went by trying to gauge when would be the best time to cross under the train. He finally decided to try it and went over the first rail to the middle of the tracks. Then he did the same thing over again, trying to gauge when to go. He decided to try it and almost made it but about 3 inches of his tail got chopped off by the train wheels. He didn’t want to lose that part of his tail so he stuck his head back to try to pick it up but the train wheels caught him again and it was all over for the little puppy.

Moral of this story: Don’t lose your head over a little piece of tail.