Chapter 681

Two sisters, one blonde and one brunette, inherit the family ranch. Unfortunately, after just a few years, they are in financial trouble. In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch, they need to purchase a bull so that they can breed their own stock.

Upon leaving, the brunette tells her sister, ‘ When I get there, if I decide to buy the bull, I’ll contact you to drive out after me and haul it home.’

The brunette arrives at the man’s ranch, inspects the bull, and decides she wants to buy it. The man tells her that he will sell it for $599, no less. After paying him, she drives to the nearest town to send her sister a telegram to tell her the news. She walks into the telegraph office, and says, ‘I want to send a telegram to my sister telling her that I’ve bought a bull for our ranch. I need her to hitch the trailer to our pickup truck and drive out here so we can haul it home.’

The telegraph operator explains that he’ll be glad to help her, then adds, it will cost $1.00 a word.

Well, after paying for the bull, the brunette realizes that she’ll only be able to send her sister one word.

After a few minutes of thinking, she nods and says, ‘I want you to send her the word ‘comfortable.’

The operator shakes his head. ‘How is she ever going to know that you want her to hitch the trailer to your pickup truck and drive out here to haul that bull back to your ranch if you send her just the word ‘comfortable?’

The brunette explains, ‘My sister is a blonde. The word is big.

She’ll read it very slowly... ‘com-for-da-bul.’

This One Is Compliments of John A.

A fellow turns to his wife in bed and whispers: “Did you know that today is National Orgasm Day?” “Oh, what a pity,” she said, “Right in the middle of National Headache Week!!”

This One Is Compliments of Dave D

Their marriage was the talk of the village; the bride was a gorgeous young thing of eighteen while the groom was ninety one!

Imagine the surprise when after just ten months the girl gave birth to a healthy nine pound baby boy.

When being interviewed for the local paper, the groom was asked how he did it.

“You just gotta keep the engine running son, that’s all. After another year the girl gave birth again in the local hospital and the old boy was asked the same question.

“Just a matter of keeping the engine running” he grinned upon which the reporter replied cheerfully.

“Well I reckon the engine needs an oil change mister, this one’s black!”

This Group Is Compliments of Mario M

A man who worked for a Fire Station came home from work one day and told his wife, “You know, we have a wonderful system at the fire station. Bell 1 rings and we all put on our jackets. Bell 2 rings and we all slide down the pole. Bell 3 rings and we’re ready to go on the trucks. So from now on we’re going to run this house the same way. When I say Bell 1, I want you to strip naked.