Jokes and Giggles - Cover

Jokes and Giggles

Copyright© 2015 by Jack Spratt

Chapter 674

This compliments of Mario

Five blokes in an Audi Quattro arrived at the ferry checkpoint.

Blonde Tracey, in her brand new uniform, stops them and tells them: “I can’t let you on the ferry. It is illegal to have 5 people in a Quattro. Quattro means four. One of you will have to get out and stay behind.”

“Quattro is just the name of the car,” the driver replies disbelievingly. “Look at the papers: this car is designed to carry five persons.”

“You cannot pull that one on me. This is Tracey you’re talking to here,” she replies with a smile. “Quattro means four. You have five people in your car and you are therefore breaking the law. So I can’t let you onto the ferry. It’s more than my job’s worth to let you all on.”

The driver is now very cross and replies angrily, “I’ve had enough of you. Call your supervisor over. I want to speak to someone with more intelligence... !”

“Sorry,” responds Tracey, “but Sharon is busy with those two blokes in the Fiat Uno.”


I was standing at the bar when a girl came up to me.

“Fancy buying me a drink?” She said,

“Sure,” I replied. “If you let me choose.”

“Okay,” she grinned. “But how will you know what I want?”

“Well, it’s a talent,” I smiled. “All I do is look a girl up and down and I know exactly what drink suits her best.”

“Okay,” she giggled. “You can choose for me.”

So I turned to the barman and said, “Diet coke please mate.”


DONALD TRUMP UPDATE.

CBS NEWS. Asked President Trump :- How do you Donald Trump, plan on Deporting 12 million Illegal Mexican Immigrants... ???

JUAN by JUAN. was his reply.


A man once told his son that if he wanted to live a long life the secret was to sprinkle a little gunpowder on his cornflakes every morning. The son did this religiously every morning, and lived to be 93.

 
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