Jokes and Giggles - Cover

Jokes and Giggles

Copyright© 2015 by Jack Spratt

Chapter 648

This Compliments of John A

A Dark and Stormy Night
This will Make Your Day

Bob Hill and his new wife Betty were vacationing in Europe ... as it happens, near Transylvania. They were driving in a rental car along a rather deserted highway. It was late at night and raining very hard with thunder and lightning.

Bob could barely see the road in front of the car. Suddenly, the car skids out of control! Bob attempts to control the car, but to no avail! The car swerves and smashes into a tree.

Moments later, Bob shakes his head to clear the fog. Dazed, he looks over at the passenger seat and sees his wife unconscious, with her head bleeding! Despite the rain and unfamiliar countryside, Bob knows he has to get her medical assistance. Bob carefully picks his wife up and begins trudging down the road. After a short while, he sees a light. He heads towards the light, which is coming from a large, old house.

He approaches the door and knocks.

A minute passes and a small, hunched old man opens the door. Bob immediately blurts, “Hello, my name is Bob Hill, and this is my wife Betty. We’ve been in a terrible accident, and my wife has been seriously hurt. Can I please use your phone?”

“I’m sorry,” replied the hunchback, “but we don’t have a phone. But my master is a doctor; come in, and I will get him!”

Bob brings his wife in. An older man comes down the stairs. “I’m afraid my assistant may have misled you. I am not a medical doctor; I am a scientist ... However, it is many miles to the nearest clinic, and I have had a basic medical training. I will see what I can do. Igor, bring them down to the laboratory.” With that, Igor picks up Betty and carries her downstairs, with Bob following closely ... Igor places Betty on a table in the lab. Bob collapses from exhaustion and his own injuries, so Igor places Bob on an adjoining table.

After a brief examination, Igor’s master looks worried. “Things are serious, Igor. Prepare a transfusion.” Igor and his master work feverishly, but to no avail, and Bob and Betty Hill both passed away.

The Hills’ deaths upset Igor’s master greatly. Wearily, he climbs the steps to his conservatory, which houses his grand piano. For it is here that he has always found solace. He begins to play, and a stirring, almost haunting melody fills the house. Meanwhile, Igor is still in the lab tidying up. His eyes catch movement, and he notices the fingers on Betty’s hand twitch, keeping time to the haunting piano music. Stunned, he watches as Bob’s arm begins to rise, marking the beat! He is further amazed as Betty and Bob both sit up straight! Unable to contain himself, he dashes up the stairs to the conservatory. He Bursts in and Shouts to his Master, “Master, Master”

“The Hills are Alive with the Sound of Music!” I am Soooooo Sorry ... But You Really Should’ve Seen That Coming!!

Happy Haloween 10/31/16

You might even consider changing your E-Mail Address Now!!!

So, what did you Expect From A Demented Old Friend on the Internet.


Their three kids, all successful, agreed to a Sunday dinner in their honor. “Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad,” gushed Son No. 1. ‘Sorry I’m running late. I had an emergency at the hospital with a patient, you know how it is, and I didn’t have time to get you a gift.”

“Not to worry,” said the father.

“Important thing is we’re all together today.”

Son No. 2 arrived.

“You and Mom look great, Dad. I just flew in from LA between depositions & didn’t have time to shop for you.”

“It’s nothing,” said the father.

“We’re glad you were able to come.”

Just then the daughter arrived.

“Hello and happy anniversary! Sorry, but my boss is sending me out of town & I was really busy packing so I didn’t have time to get you anything.”

After they had finished dessert, the father said,

“There’s something your mother and I have wanted to tell you for a long time. “You see, we were really poor, but we managed to send each of you to college. Through the years your mother and I knew we loved each other very much, but we just never found the time to get married.”

The three children gasped and said, “WHAT? You mean we’re bastards?”

“Yep”, said the father, “Cheap ones too...”

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