Jokes and Giggles
Copyright© 2015 by Jack Spratt
Chapter 647
A single woman was shopping at the local supermarket where she selected:
A half-gallon of 2% milk
A carton of eggs
A quart of orange juice
A head of lettuce
A 2 lb. Can of coffee
A 1 lb. package of bacon
As she was unloading the items on to the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up the purchases, the drunk calmly stated, “You must be single.”
She was a bit startled by this proclamation, but was intrigued by the drunk’s intuition, since she indeed had never found Mr. Right and was single.
She looked over the six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status. Curiosity got the better of her and she said, “‘Yes, you are correct. But how on earth did you know that I was single?”
The drunk replied, “Cause ... you’re really fuckin’ ugly.”
A friend of mine has two tickets for the 2017 Super Bowl. Box seats plus airfares, accommodation etc., but he didn’t realize when he bought them that this is going to be on the same day as his wedding - so he can’t go. If you’re interested and want to go instead of him...
it’s at St Peter’s Church, in New York City, at 5pm. Her name’s Louise. She’s 5’4”, about 125 lbs, good cook, makes $130,000 a year! She will be the one in the white dress.
Here is the answer, finally!!!~:-) Went out last night for Halloween dressed as a chicken Met a girl dressed as an egg. A lifelong question was answered. It was the chicken.
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