Chapter 627

These Are Compliments of Smokeyjoe

The old people’s home put on a bus trip for its residents, they toured around stopping every now and then for a bit of sightseeing. Around lunchtime, they pulled in to a pub’s car park and they all went in to get a counter lunch.

Edith and Mary had a lovely lunch with a pot of beer, Edith then said to Mary “Would you go to the bar and get another beer, whilst your there ask if there’s any entertainment on?”

So Mary goes to the bar, asked for two pots of beer then asked the barman if there was any entertainment.

“Yes love, just some country and western.”

Mary, a bit hard of hearing, goes back to their table and when Edith asks about entertainment, Mary said “He said yes, just some cunt from Preston.”

Young Bill goes to the doctor and tells him, “Doc, I’ve got a problem, I can’t get an erection. No matter what I or my girlfriend does, it won’t come up.”

So the doc checks him out, sticks a couple of hormone shots in him and sends him on his way.

A week later, he’s back, “No joy doc, still won’t stand up and I’m getting de desperate.”

So the doc really goes to town, samples of everything and gets the lab to do a rush job.

The results are back within the hour, doc checks them out, sticks a couple more needles in him and tells him he should be right now.

But no joy, he’s back a few days later, frustrated the doc says, “I’ve got something I can use, a bit drastic, but if you’re willing...”

“Anything doc, anything.”

So the doc goes into another room, comes back with a large hypodermic syringe filled with a white mixture, “Drop your pants and hang on to your penis.” In goes the needle and 5 minutes it’s sticking up triumphant, the kid takes off like there’s no tomorrow.

Two weeks later, he’s back in the docs surgery, “Doc, it’s still standing up, it’s getting embarrassing, what the hell did you give me?”

“Two of sand and one of cement.”