Chapter 607

This is from Richard J.

Be warned it is so bad it is funny...

Games to play in a boring office.

Office work dull? None of your colleagues appreciate your humour? ... Well if you’re like me then here are a series of gags that will keep you amused for hours, embarrass your work colleagues and probably end with your Pink slip- what a way to go though!?!

Run one lap around the office at top speed.

Groan out loud in the bathroom cubicle (at least one other ‘non-player’ must be in the bathroom at the time) then say, “Geez, that burns!”

When they’re not looking, pour most of someone’s fresh cup of coffee into your mug leaving them with an inch of brew.

Ignore the first five people who say ‘good morning’ to you.

Phone someone in the office you barely know, leave your name and say “Just called to say I can’t talk right now. Bye.”

To signal the end of a conversation, clamp your hands over your ears and grimace. When someone hands you a piece of paper, finger it, and whisper huskily, “Mmmmmmm, that feels soooooo good!”

Leave your zipper open for one hour. If anyone points it out, say, “Sorry, I really prefer it this way.”

In the middle of a meeting, suddenly shout out “Yahtzee!”

While riding an elevator, gasp dramatically every time the doors opens.

Say to your boss, “I like your style” and shoot him with double-barrelled fingers.

Babble incoherently at a fellow employee then ask “Did you get all that, I don’t want to have to repeat it.”

Page yourself over the intercom (do not disguise your voice).

Kneel in front of the water cooler and drink directly from the nozzle (there must be a ‘non-player’ within sight).

Shout random numbers while someone is counting.

At the end of a meeting, suggest that, for once, it would be nice to conclude with the singing of the national anthem.

Walk into a very busy person’s office and while they watch you with growing irritation, turn the light switch on/off 10 times.

For an hour, refer to everyone you speak to as ‘Bob.’

Announce to everyone in a meeting that you “really have to go do number two”.

After every sentence, say ‘mon’ in a really bad Jamacian accent. As in, “the report’s on your desk, mon.” Keep this up for one hour.

While an office mate is out, move their chair into the elevator.

In a meeting or crowded situation, slap your forehead repeatedly and mutter, “Shut up, damm it, all of you just shut up!”

At lunchtime, get down on your knees and announce “As God is my witness, I’ll never go hungry again.”

In a colleagues diary, write in 10am: “See how I look in tights.”

Carry your keyboard over to your colleague and ask “You wanna trade?”

Repeat the following conversation 10 times to the same person: “Do you hear that?” “What?” “Never mind, it’s gone now”

Come to work in army fatigues and when asked why, say, “I can’t talk about it.”

Posing as a maitre d’, call a colleague and tell him he’s won a lunch for four at a local restaurant. Let him go.

Speak with an accent (French, German, Porky Pig, etc) during a very important conference call.

Find the vacuum and start vacuuming around your desk.

Hang a two-foot long piece of toilet roll from the back of yourself and act genuinely surprised when someone points it out.

Tuck one pant leg into your sock and when queried, answer, “not now”, and walk away.