Chapter 529

This one is compliments of the magician

Irish cop and London lawyer...

A famous London lawyer runs a stop sign in a rural area outside of Dublin and gets pulled over by an Irish cop. He thinks that he is smarter than the cop because he is a lawyer from London and is certain that he has a better education then any local Irish cop. He decides to prove this to himself and have some fun at the Irish cop’s expense.

Irish cop says, “License and registration, please.”

Big-shot London lawyer says, “What for?”

Irish cop says, “Ye didnae come to a complete stop at the stop sign.”

London Lawyer says, “I slowed down, and no one was coming.”

Irish cop says, “Ye still didnae come to a complete stop. License and registration, please.”

London Lawyer says, “What’s the difference?”

Irish cop says, “The difference is, ye huvte come to complete stop, that’s the law. License and registration, please!”

London Lawyer says, “If you can show me the legal difference between slow down and stop, I’ll give you my license and registration and you give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don’t give me the ticket.”

Irish cop says, “Sounds fair. Exit your vehicle, sir.”

The London Lawyer exits his vehicle.

The Irish cop takes out his baton and starts beating the crap out of the lawyer and says, “Daeye want me to stop or just slow down?”

This one is compliments of Gary

Two bowling teams, one of all Blondes and one of all Brunettes, charter a double-decker bus for a weekend bowling tournament in Atlantic City.

The Brunette team rides on the bottom of the bus. The Blonde team rides on the top level.

The Brunette team down below is whooping it up having a great time, when one of them realizes she doesn’t hear anything from the Blondes upstairs.

She decides to get up and investigate. When the Brunette reaches the top, she finds all the Blondes frozen in fear, staring straight ahead at the road, and clutching the seats in front of them with white knuckles.

The brunette asks, “What the heck’s going on up here? We’re having a great time downstairs!”

One of the Blondes looks up at her, swallows hard and says, “YEAH, BUT YOU’VE GOT A DRIVER!”

This short tip is compliments of John

Relationship tips for men; When a women says correct me if I am wrong, but,,,. DON’T DO IT!! IT’S A TRAP!!! Do not, I repeat do not correct that women!!!