Chapter 478

ROBOT FOR SALE...

A father buys a robot that slaps people when they lie.

He decides to test it out at dinner one night.

The father asks his son what he did that afternoon.

The son says, "I did some schoolwork."

The robot slaps the son.

The son says, "Ok, Ok. I was at a friend's house watching movies."

Dad asks, "What movie did you watch?"

Son says, "Toy Story."

The robot slaps the son.

Son says, "Ok, Ok, we were watching porn."

Dad says, "What? At your age I didn't even know what porn was."

The robot slaps the father.

Mom laughs and says, "Well, he certainly is your son."

The robot slaps the mother.

Robot for sale!

RabbiRabbit likes this one:

Mrs. Murphy and Mrs. Cohen had been long-time friends but, being old-fashioned, each went to a retirement home of her own respective religion.

It was not long before Mrs. Murphy felt lonesome for Mrs. Cohen, so one day she asked to be driven to the Jewish Home to visit her old friend. When she arrived she was greeted with open arms, hugs and kisses.

Mrs. Murphy said "Don't be holdin' back Mrs. Cohen, how do you like it here?"

Mrs. Cohen went on and on about the wonderful food, the facility and the caretakers.

Then, with a twinkle in her eye she said "But the best thing is that I now have a boyfriend."

Mrs. Murphy said "Now isn't that wonderful! Tell me all about it."

Mrs. Cohen said "After lunch, we go up to my room and sit on the edge of the bed. I let him touch me on the top and then touch me down below and then we sing Jewish songs".

Mrs. Murphy said "For sure it's a blessing. I'm so glad for you Mrs. Cohen."

Mrs. Cohen said "And how is it with you Mrs. Murphy?"

Mrs. Murphy said it was also wonderful at her new facility and that she also had a boyfriend.

Mrs. Cohen said "Good for you! So what do you do?"

Mrs. Murphy said, "We also go up to my room after lunch and sit on the edge of the bed. I let him touch me on top and then I let him touch me down below."

Mrs. Cohen said "Yes? And then... ?"

Mrs. Murphy said "Well, since we don't know any Jewish songs, we fuck."

RabbiRabbit's Second Favorite Blond Joke:

The Blonde is showing off her new tattoo of a giant sea shell on her inner thigh. Her friends ask her why she would get such a tattoo and in that location.

She responds 'It's really cool...

If you put your ear up against it, you can smell the ocean!!