Chapter 444

Here's your English lesson for the day: "Complete" or "Finished'

No dictionary has ever been able to satisfactorily define the difference between "complete" and "finished."

However, during a recent linguistic conference, held in London, England, and attended by some of the best linguists in the world, Samsundar Balgobin, a Guyanese linguist, was the presenter when he was asked to make that very distinction.

The question put to him by a colleague in the erudite audience was this: "Some say there is no difference between 'complete' and 'finished.' Please explain the difference in a way that is easy to understand."

Mr. Balgobin's response: "When you marry the right woman, you are 'complete.' If you marry the wrong woman, you are 'finished.' And, if the right one catches you with the wrong one, you are 'completely finished.'

His answer received a five minute standing ovation.

This one is compliments of Joe

I went to my nearby cvs pharmacy, straight to the back, where the pharmacists high counter is located.

I took out my little brown bottle, along with a teaspoon, and set them up on the counter.

The pharmacist came over, smiled, and asked if he could help me.

I said, "yes! Could you please taste this for me?"

Seeing a senior citizen, the pharmacist went along.

He took the spoon, put a tiny bit of the liquid on it, put it on his tongue and swilled it around.

Then, with a stomach-churning look on his face, he spat it out on the floor and began coughing.

When he finally was finished, I looked him right in the eye and asked, "Now, does that taste sweet to you?"

The pharmacist, shaking his head back and forth with a venomous look in his eyes yelled, "Hell no!!!"

I said, "Oh, thank god! That's a real relief! My doctor told me to have a pharmacist test my urine for sugar!"

I can never go back to that cvs, but I really don't care, because they aren't very friendly there anymore!